I wish I hadn't expressed anger as much as I did. Ken would tell me that I felt too entitled to my anger and I think he was right. He was rarely angry, and I wish I would have behaved more as he did, calmer. It would have made him happier. That is my main regret.
I can't help but feel all of us WISH some stuff was different , I know I do, I have beat the hell out of myself over things I had said or not said , did and didn't do.. we all prolly have some regret we are human after all. I know if it were I who had passed , my Sean would be feeling the same way and I wouldnt want him to. I am so greatful we met so young being our time was cut short.. now to get myself to accept what I just wrote.. I do believe it to be true <3 to us all
Yikes! I certainly do and it tears me up if I allow it to.
Steve was the rational one-I can honestly say I saw him lose his cool one time and never with myself or the kids. Shit just didn't bother him.
A very wise person told me to let the thoughts and feelings of poor behavior go as there is a unspoken understanding, a special intimacy in a loving marriage that forgives such actions.
I cling to the understanding that all is forgiven now, where he is, there is no judgement and no regrets. And I'm doing the best I can to apply that same understanding each day while I'm still here.
Yes, that sounds exactly like what I feel. Somehow we need to forgive ourselves, we can rest assured that our husbands forgave us already. Hugs.
Oh you took the words right out of my mouth! I have been beating myself up since my husband died almost four and a half years ago!! So many times I was such a bitch and make life miserable. We were married for thirteen years and he had a drinking problem and then cheated on me, I divorced him and long story short we remarried years later after we both had failed marriages with other people. He had stopped drinking and we were older and wiser. We were togther a total of 35 years. But we didn't talk when he got the cancer and we didn't talk about him dying, we just didn't communicate about anything and he was not affectionate, but I knew he loved me. And I should have talked to him and thanked him for everything he did for me and all the ways he showed me how much he loved me but I didn't and he died and I feel so guilty and ashamed it's killing me!!!! Everyone says to get over it, that it's OK, he has forgiven me, but I can't forgive myself!