mls64 I totally agree.
I am an "extroverted introvert", which means I enjoy being with other people, but I need a good deal of time at home by myself. Emphasis on "at home." For me, a weekend away is not half as enjoyable as a weekend at home when I can just relax. I feel no need or desire for another male companion. Sometimes it bothers me that I like this life so much; it makes me feel like the 30 years I was with my husband made no sense. Maybe it's that during those years I was a younger and different person for whom marriage was fulfilling, but now I am old and crabby (*grin*) and I like to go my own way.
I've just passed five years since Ray died. He was in care for the fifteen month prior to his passing so I have been alone for a long time. For the first few years it was really hard, and I missed him terribly. Then my life settled down and I tried dating an older man but could see it was not what I wanted and he was the same having been alone for a long time.. It is not easy to fit in with someone else's schedule at my age (70) so we are still friends but that is all. I feel better about being alone now. Maybe I will find another person to do some eating out or going to the movies with but for now my widowed friends are the people I eat out with. At 70 being alone is not the worse thing that happens.
It seems to me that someday's I feel fine alone... Other days, I wish I wasn't alone. But if I need to be out amongst others, I just leave the house. I hope that is normal.
I'm looking forward to becoming a Grandma for the first time. It won't be long now. She is due on Oct. 26 :-) I'm trying to concentrate on that and that only.
I'm looking so forward to this baby boy. :-)
There are times when I am fine when I'm on my own and times when I hate it. I had a good Christmas but now everyone I know seem to have plans for January (which is school holidays here) and my routine is disrupted as most of the organisations I belong to close down for at least three weeks so I have little to do and too much time on my own. When I was part of a family that was rest and relaxation time now it seems slow and boring.