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We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

Last year July of 2012 my husband passed away, four days later my owner/office manager passed away.  Four days before my husband passed I had to put one of my fur babies down that I had for 13 years. 

I lost a dear sweet friend in November of 2012, another one in February of 2012 and today I find out another friend of mine has passed away.  What hurts more than anything else is the loss I know these families are going through especially the friend that just passed as she left a husband and a teenage daughter (young teen).  So much in less than a year and it just breaks my heart because I want to do something but the family is keeping everything private at the moment and understandably so, it just hurts to see so much pain on top of seeing more and more new widows and widowers.  I know it is part of life but why so many so fast?  It makes it hard to want to move forward because you don't want to hurt any more and because of what we have been through we don't want to put anyone through this kind of hurt. 


Do we stalemate the rest of our lives and just function or do we eventually accept the inevitable and try to live life to the fullest?



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I think we really need to accept the inevitable, as best we can.  Otherwise, you're a hamster on a wheel.  To honor life, I feel I must LIVE, not just exist.  It's hard though.  I know what I need to do - acceptance, moving forward, etc. - but easier to know than to do.  (((HUGS))) I'm so sorry for all the losses you've experienced. 

Aeleice, I'm so sorry you've had to deal with so much pain in such a short time. I lost my husband in May 2011, sense then I have lost 2 Aunts, 5 friends and i have 3 more fighting cancer now. It would be easier to avoid people to protect our hearts from more pain and loss but we would just be trading one pain for another. The pain of loneliness and depression. I try to help others with what I've learned in my journey and live one day at a time to bring peace and happiness in where ever I can find it. We all need people and we have to except that none of us are guaranteed the amount of time we have here on earth. So to honer my husband and everyone else that I love I plan on make the best of the time I have and help others to do the same. I do still have bad days but I hope for the best each morning when my feet hit the floor.

Thank you both.  I know that I am going to continue to live life to the fullest, my Steve, loved the Tim McGraw song, "Live Like You Are Dying".  That is how he had always lived his life and since his passing and the fog had started to lift I chose to do the same.  It still makes my heart ache when I see so many people that I know pass and some are just way to young.  I know in the past year I have heard people tell me things happen for a reason and No, I do not accept the fact there is a reason my husband passed but in the same respect it has made me more aware of grief and I have found I am able to reach out to people that I know and help them.  I asked about the stalemate because here and in other groups I am involved in I see and read where so many people are just barely functioning and they are ones that have been without their love for years now. No that it is a bad thing but just the fact I see it.  I want to take what has happened to me and use it to help others.  I am so glad that I am a part of Widow Village as in the short time I have been here I have found s many things to learn from and grow even more as a person.


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