A community of peers created by the Soaring Spirits Loss Foundation
Tags: introductions, welcome
Permalink Reply by heatherL on April 3, 2012 at 10:54am
Permalink Reply by Paula Rene on April 3, 2012 at 11:18am Renee, I am so sorry for your loss and your children's loss. I am also sorry for the other widow's loss who attended your husband's funeral but so glad she was there to give you some great advice. I lost my husband when my children were 9 (son) & 13 going on 40(daughter). My children refused counseling and kept saying they were OK but 4 years later, my daughter finally lost it. That's when we all got some long overdue counseling. I was so busy trying to care for them that I never grieved and they were so busy trying to put up a good front that they never grieved.
Take time for yourself and do get on this site and really talk to all of us. It has helped me so much. I love that your son and his dad had the John Wayne movies in common. My daughter and her daddy spent hours together watching John Wayne movies. I still have them all on VHS and it is such a comfort to just sit and watch "The Duke" and think about the wonderful times we had together.
Paula Rene
Permalink Reply by Hunt on April 4, 2012 at 11:08am Hi Renee, I'm so sorry for your loss. My wife died in December, also following kidney failure, in ICU. It's a terrible thing to go through with your beloved. I can't imagine going back to work so quickly, and am truly sorry that you have to. I couldn't bring myself to go in at all for almost a month, other than to sign checks. I am still having trouble focusing and engaging almost 4 months in, although I can manage a full day if I have to, like if clients are in from out of town. It will get easier. I work to be kind to myself, and to give myself time to just 'be'. I know with kids at home that is probably easier said than done, but you are worth it.
Permalink Reply by Paula on April 2, 2012 at 11:29pm Hello Rene, I am sorry for your loss. You must be so numb now. This is the right place to be, there must be every sort of experience here and you can say what ever you want to when you want to and it's ok, because we get it and we know it sucks.
Permalink Reply by lorioc42 on April 3, 2012 at 10:29am Welcome Jerry and Renee, I'm glad you joined .. sorry we had to meet you under these circumstances though. Sending {{{HUGS}}} and strength, and peace your way.
Permalink Reply by Hunt on April 3, 2012 at 11:24pm Hi, I'm Hunt I was widowed December 21, 2011.
My wife of 28 years, Candi, died in ICU due to complications following GI surgery. She was diagnosed with Lupus 10 years earlier, and had been fighting the disease and it's effects on her body the entire time. We have 4 children together (all now grown), the two oldest are each married, and we(?) have two grandkids from our oldest boy and his wife. I've know for over a decade that I would lose her, and almost did on at least 5 other occasions. Her passing felt like what was supposed to happen when it did, but I still feel like part of me was forcibly torn off. She and I talked about her probably dying first, and also about what an incredible closeness and intimacy we developed dealing with her health together.
I look forward to getting to know you all.
Permalink Reply by Joyce on April 4, 2012 at 12:11am Welcome Hunt, sorry for your loss. We are looking forward to getting to know you too. This place has been a life saver for me. My husband died in October of 2011. Sending hugs your way!
Welcome, Hunt. I'm so sorry for your loss. My husband, Walter passed on Jan 6, 2009 from kidney failure and congestive heart failure. He was on dialysis when we married but received a kidney transplant and we were given an incredible gift of many more years together because of it. We also talked about his death very openly and I often tell people about the depth of our relationship that I know was partially because of his health and what we had to go through. We had a truly special relationship. Still, it didn't prepare me for the grief I would feel when he died. I'm glad you found this site. There are so many great people here who truly understand all the stages of grief that we must all lgo through. I wish you strength for your journey and blessings to you and your family.
Permalink Reply by TJ on April 5, 2012 at 8:36pm Hi,
I am new to things here. My husband died 12/28/10. He had a long battle with many illness. He went to the hospital on Christmas day. Two days later he was unconscious and intabated and I was told he had an infection in his leg that got into his blood stream and shut down his liver, which meant the dialysis he needed was not an option. He died the next day. Our son was 7 at the time. It has been a little over a year now. I guess we are doing alright, but it is awful lonely.
Well that is me in a nut shell.
Permalink Reply by bogie77 (Donna) on April 5, 2012 at 9:00pm TJ, so sorry for the reason you're here, but so glad you found us. My husband passed away 12/31/10, so we're at about the same point in that respect. My kids are grown and on their own, though, so I'm probably considerably older. My husband had bile duct cancer for about a year. This journey that we've been forced to take is definitely a long, tough, lonely road, but this place has definitely been a Godsend!
Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.
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