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Hi I'm new...my hubby died 9/11/19..after being sent to emergency, hospital, rehab/SNF 9 times over 9 months..We were married 50 years...and I have such a mixture of emotions...so very sad he is gone, yet  relieved he is no longer suffering. The SNF experience was one my heart aches for anyone having to go there. Supposedly he was in one of the 'better' ones, but  it was an awful experience.

He had a major stroke a few days after going from the hospital to rehab ....he had only been there for a UTI and I am still bitter he had a stroke in a rehab/long term.nursing facility. 

btw Is anyone here from central Florida?

God Bless yu all..thanks for 'listening'

I am Lindsey, widowed August 16th 2019. Together for 12 years and Married for 7. We have 2 boys age 13 AND 9. I am from Indiana and work in the education field. This is by far the hardest thing my children or I have ever had to do. 

Hi Lindsey,  I am so sorry you are going through this..My heart goes out to you and your boys. I can not begin to imagine how hard this must be for you in having your grief and then also having to comfort and help your boys in their loss too.  There are never adequate words for these losses but my prayers are with you and our boys.

Hugs Lindsey! I'm so so sorry your heart is hurting! I'm in the education field (this is my last year), and am a hospice chaplain.  Widowed twice. My first husband was my high scool sweetheart. We were married 30 years, had 4 kids (3 are living) and 6 gbabies. Our youngest was still at home & 6yo when he died. It's so hard to walk your own grief journey, help children with theirs, and also try to keep things consistent & happy in their lives. 

Having others who "get it" that you can talk things out with at times is so very helpful. If you ever need to talk, feel free to message me.Giant hugs!

Nita

Greetings to all. I am very glad to have found this site just recently. Oh how I wish I had known about it a long time ago. Better late than never, as the saying goes. I was suddenly widowed at the age of 46 in Fall of 2004. It's been a rough road, but I found that with immediate grief counseling and tremendous support from my physicians at the time, I managed to get through it all. The passage of time and a lot of hard work on my part has brought me to today, where I feel like my life has settled into somewhat of a steady state. I'm not quite sure what that means in the larger picture of life's journey, but it is what it is. I am checking out the site as a newbie, and joined a few groups that look like a good fit. This site looks like a tremendous resource. Thanks to all who made it happen.

Hi Freebird.  I can not imagine what you have gone through in your journey through  pain in the last 15 years.It's  good to know things are getting a little better for you.  I am pretty new to this site too and join you in being grateful to those who created this site and continue to support it. I wish you all the best in all areas of your life!

Thank you Dolly. Things are actually pretty darn good in the larger picture. However, the holidays are now here, so I don't think I need to elaborate on how that affects us all. I also recently discovered the book entitled "It's OK That You're Not OK". Granted I am reading it 15 years later, but...the overall message has been a tremendous help to me. I'm an optimist by nature. I will admit that dealing with such a sudden life change was traumatic and exhausting, and sometimes continues to be exhausting, but I can still see the light at the end of the tunnel, and it is not an oncoming train. :)

Hi Freebird. I'm so glad you are "doing ok".  It's been a year since my Cyndi died suddenly. I'm better than I was, thanks to time and lots of support and the knowledge that she wanted me to go on with life.  It will take lots more time to get to where you are but I know that I will. It's what Cyndi wanted. Thank you for your example!

You're welcome, BillDrums. My husband's passing in 2004 was also a sudden thing. Ouch. Even though it has been 15 years, there is not a single day that I do not think about him. And the trigger dates like the no-more birthdays, no-more anniversaries, the solo holidays...yikes. Yes they still hurt like hell but...I do a lot of online article reading to help myself get through those emotions, and now I have this site. I had the advantage of going to a grief counselor immediately after the fact, and then again to another counselor at approx the 2 year mark. It was my idea to go to both in a 1:1 setting in a private office. I still have my notes from those sessions. I look at them once in a great while, just for perspective of Then and Now. You are welcome to send a Friend request if you like. I'm brand new (here) so I'm not sure how that works on the site. :)

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