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Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

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Thank you.

Hi, Joined Soaring Spirits about a year ago meeting for lunch.  I signed on to Widow Village just a couple of weeks ago and have read some of the posts and online chat.

I am widowed about 1-1/2 years now married for 41 years.  I find I just don't know what to say to people in these large groups.  I was so used to just "the two of us" there didn't seem to be an outside world.  I feel empty inside, eating an awful lot.  Mostly junk food and a lot of anxiety.  I am able to take care of myself with the exception of having health issues that limits me to activities.

thanks for joining us, hugs Fran.

Hi. I have been widowed just over two months now. Mitch and I were married for almost 14 years. He died suddenly from a massive heart attack. I think I'm still numb and in disbelief. I have two kids - a 12 yo boy and a 10 yo girl. We are all managing day by day. I feel compelled to advocate for my kids more than ever and live for my kids more than ever. I think my grief is getting lost in the shuffle so I'm trying to reach out. Thinking about Camp Widow in San Diego in July. Thought I'd check in here to start.

Hello Siouxieg - my condolences. You are in the right spot here and I'm glad you reached out to us. You say you feel numb and that your advocacy for your young kids is making your grief get lost. These are normal feelings. The numbness I described as fog. It is there to protect you - if you can allow it, don't push it away. It is there to protect you. Right now you are doing the right things. Take care of your kids and yourself. Ask for help from your support network that is nearby. People want to help but they have no clue how. They will say stupid stuff - you will have to overlook it. Read our stories, they are similar. Write about your feelings because it may feel good to you and because many times, it helps the others who are in a similar boat understand where they are. My thoughts are with you this evening. Please take care and let us know how you are doing. 

Hi Siouxieq -

I am so sorry for your loss.  You're feeling just what you need to be right now.  I don't know about being widowed with young kids...however, I can tell you that you're on the right track about Camp Widow.  I have been a few times. I love my widowed family!  I can tell you that  it changed my life. I'm not just saying that.  It truly did. 

There is an amazing kids program the same weekend as a part of Camp Widow.  Recovery is a family affair.  I know the kids who are a part of this program and who mentor the kids.  I have seen them grow and become amazing humans in spite of their losses. 

In the meantime, depending on where you live, there may be a Regional Group near you.  check out 

http://www.soaringspirits.org/regional-social-events/

for more info.  

For right now...feel how you feel.  Hug your kids...but take care of you.  YOU are important. Make sure you breathe, sleep, and eat.  If not, 

Come here any time. Reach out.  Utilize the chat.  You're all going to be ok. 

It may not seem that way, but I promise it will happen. 

Peace

Sue 

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