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I was widowed @ 46. My husband battled esophageal cancer for just over a year. We were married 26 years he was 9 years older than me so I knew I would be a widow but thought I would be older. I am dating the father of one of my co-workers and really struggled with feeling like I was cheating in my husband. Initially I just wanted to go to dinner with someone who could relate to what I was going through. He has been widowed for 15 years and is so patient with me and my kids. His jkids and my kids get along so well and he knows thaty kids have to work out how they feel about us daring. Don't know if marriage is ever going to be what I want again but I am enjoying being with someone who undersrands.  We started dating 1 year after Wayne's death it had been a journey and I know Wayne would not want be to be alone. Like you I feel to old to date but to young to spend the rest of my life alone.

What an incredible story, Joanna! I am so glad you have found love again. 

Wishing you the very best with your new love. I imagine your former husband will always be in your heart.



My husband Ken died on January 14, 2006. Our kids were 6 and 10, and the day is also my daughter's birthday. I was 44 years old. He had Hodgkin's disease which they'll say is a "good cancer" to get because it has an excellent prognosis. So at the beginning, we were resolute in our belief that he would get well and that this was to be a temporary glitch in our lives. I was amazed that we could continue to go on living well with cancer in our midst...until it came back. He ended up having a stem cell transplant. But then it came back again. This time he went for a second stem cell transplant leaving our home in Chicago to go to Houston's MD Anderson. He pretty much spent the last 6 months of his life in a hospital room. Nothing went right. Everything went wrong. But he was such a strong, cool, caring guy. He continued to help others with his kind and giving nature until the end. I went back and forth to Texas for 6 months while my niece helped be a "mom" to my kids when I was gone. We had a whole long list of people who came to Texas to be with Ken when I couldn't be there including his parents in their 80s. In 6 months, he never spent one day alone in Texas without a friend or family member by his side. He was a clinical therapist who had a private therapy practice as well as working in child welfare administration. The world would have been a better place if he were still in it. Most of all, I hate that my kids don't get to have his fathering anymore. Hate that.

It's funny, you're my only friend on this site and I just read your background.  Similar to mine.  My husband was 48 when he was diagnosed with Stage IV colon cancer, they found it in his lungs.  He lived a full life for 5 years despite many different chemo regimens, 4 major operations at MD Anderson in Houston and and Proton Therapy in Houston.  My husband was a fun, loving and caring guy also.  He helped so many more people than I knew during his lifetime.  People came out of the woodwork to tell me how Bob went out of his way to help them with their struggles with cancer or other things.  He was an inspiration by the way he battled his cancer with courage, grace and even humor all the while trying to remain as productive as possible.  I have two daughters 22 and 16.  We miss him everyday, but he is with me.  He sends me powerful signs on a regular basis!  Just got another one today. 

Can you tell me what signs you get from your dear husband?  I don't mean to be personal, but I love to hear of people who get signs from their spouses.  It makes me feel so much at peace to think that others truly feel their loved ones haven't died, but have gone on to another place and they will see them again.  I got a few signs in my dreams that make me feel great, but I haven't gotten any in awhile.

Just HAVE to share what happened today! Yesterday was 18 months since my love left us. I don't know why, but 18 months has really kicked my butt! I finally had my meltdown last night. I cried so hard! I screamed at him for not fighting harder, then I cried more for doing that. I asked him if he was in Heaven to please let me know! My 1st husband had let me know and for some reason I have never asked my 2nd husband.

Let me back up a lil. My husband was a preacher and a singer. He sang in a quartet years ago. So, for his funeral I gave a cassette tape of him singing in the quartet to a guy to do the sound for the service. Well, he lost it! For 18 months I've cried over this tape that the guy lost and he's continued to look for it and feel horrible.

This morning we (my lil girl & I) got in the car to go to church and THE TAPE WAS IN MY CAR!!! I didn't own this car when he died so it couldn't have been hidden in there somewhere! I keep my car locked so no one could have put it in there! It was under the kleenex box and I put a new kleenex box in there not even 2 weeks ago and there was no tape in there!

I asked the guy who did the service about it and he said he has never found it!

Right when I needed it most, I truly believe God allowed my husband to put that tape in the car to show me he was there and that he is healed and perfect now!


That. is. AWESOME.!!!!Thank you for sharing!!


WOW ... WOW ... WOW!!! What an amazing blessing.


That is the most wonderful message. I, too, have lost a tape of Jud singing. Hope I will get a gift like you did.

That is a beautiful thing!



That is wonderful news!  I totally understand - because a similar situation happened to me.  I went to a lecture and had 2 sets of keys - my husbands set of keys was missing when I went into my car.   I thought I could of lost them at the place from the lecture - but it was not there.  I searched all through my purse - emptied out the contents of my purse and nothing - looked throughout my car and called the place the next day - and they searched the parking lot and nothing.  I asked my husband to please help me find these keys (they were his keys).  2 days later I put my hand in my purse and there were the keys!  I know it was him also.....


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