In the early stages of my grief, I was wandering around in a trance-like fog simply feeling lost and pretty destroyed as a result of losing my husband. It was as if I died with him but I was left behind.
During this time, I was scouting the bargain racks at a neighborhood Barnes and Noble and saw a book called, When God Winks at You: How The Power of Coincidence Guides Your Life. I read the first story and it peaked my curiosity, so I bought it (see below). Soon thereafter, I started to experience what I felt were potentially messages from my husband.
For example, I was walking back home from the market one day, I came across an advertisement for a TV program called, "Did I really die?" When I saw it, I whispered under my breath, "Yeah sweetie, you really did." Another time, I was walking home from a Home Depot, and saw two large smiley type faces drawn in chalk on a wall. One read, "Hello Grumpy" and the other read, "Be Happy." There was a time when my husband did something that annoyed me and he walked over and said the words, "Hello Grumpy" to me to make me smile. Coincidences, perhaps, and some were less subtle than others but those "coincidences" meant something to me specifically.
So, I'm curious, have you experienced any Winks?
My pleasure Rainy!
I just had one this morning.
Ron and I were travelers. He knew that I planned to scatter bits of his ashes in various places and so far I've deposited them in 7 places in 6 countries. This morning I was flying home from Dallas- the last leg of a trip home from India and Nepal, where I'd scattered some of his ashes in the Ganges, with a Hindu priest chanting verses from the Vedas and some in Kathmandu, at the base of a beautiful old tree on the property of the resort where I stayed. I'd picked up an issue of the India edition of Conde Nast Traveler in Delhi Airport and was reading an article on St. Petersburg, Russia, where we'd gone on our honeymoon in 2003. There was a spectacular double-page shot of the Amber Room in the Catherine Palace. I pulled out my phone and went to the album of pictures from that trip and looked at the one the guide had taken when we were in that room in the Catherine Palace. I think I was able to find the spot where we stood in the picture in the magazine!
I came across something online randomly at 2:30 am. I'm actually in a FUNK and not sleeping etc.. ya'll know how it is. So anyway I went to a website randomly googling clearance just looking.... and this is what I came across.
First, let me set it up by saying there were all sorts of random items on the screen but the only items that had words on them are the ones, I'm about to tell you about.
The first row had some little bird earrings, next is a necklace that said Love You Always, I scrolled down a little when I see a necklace that said Beleive in Miracles. I didn't think anything of either. On down the page, a bit a little necklace said, Be Brave, Keep Going. Then on down, a ring that says Miracles, on down the last line there was a necklace that said Free as a Bird. Some of you may have noticed, "Free Bird" is a thing of Jerry's. After I saw that, I thought wow that is the biggest God Wink I've ever gotten!! Then I went back to the top, so I wouldn't forget anything and because I didn't think anyone would believe it and made a video.
I struggle with the whole message thing and am on the fence about it. I just don't see how ppl in Heaven can be happy if they can see us here. So, I don't know.
Maybe it's sleep deprivation or maybe it's Jerry or maybe it's God himself telling me he has his hand on my darling man. Who, really knows but I'll take whatever it is as it had lifted my mood this morning.
Two days after my Rick passed, December 20, 2017, I was trying to log onto his Yahoo account. It wouldn't let me in, since I was using the password he told me months prior to use. I was freaking out, because all of our e-bills and financial stuff, and emails from friends and our then-running marmalade business, and then Yahoo linked him up to Facebook and then Messenger. Rick took care of all the financials and contacts since he was retired, and I am still working a full time job. In my panic, I started going through files, etc, but nothing. I then looked over at a dusty Rolodex on the windowsill. I hadn't looked in it for years. Guess what the Rolodex was turned to? Yahoo, with his new password. I knew for a fact that was my Rick. But in the 3 months since he passed, there has been nothing else from him. Nothing. And it has made me sad to know he's no longer around. He had completely rebuilt our house from the studs up, and built our guest house all by himself, so just being in our house gives me comfort. But I was sad that I didn't feel his 'presence'.
Well, Monday I was getting ready to leave work. I now drive his Mini, which has a fob for a key. I unlocked the door, sat in the seat, and I hadn't had a chance to insert the fob into the ignition when the radio turned on all by itself! OK, I thought, that's odd. When I got home, my sister, who has been staying in the guest house since Rick's passing, came up and said 'don't ask me what is going on with the TV and radio'. When I leave for work, I leave the radio on for my dogs, and the TV is off. She came up to the house about noon, and the radio was off, and the TV was on. Not only that, but nothing worked on the remote....nothing. Turns out, the TV in the guest house did the same, and then hers changed channels all by itself. She thought there must be something wrong with the Satellite box. She then went into one of the bedrooms where all of his marmalades are stored, and she picked up a jar, and instantaneously broke into wracking sobs, out of nowhere! She left the guesthouse, thinking that Rick was there. She checked the dogs, but they weren't acting differently.
I contacted DISH, took the day off yesterday, and the technician was there for 2 hours, checking and re-checking both TV's, satellite box, everything.......he couldn't find anything wrong. He just re-set everything, and it's working fine again. Now maybe I'm over-thinking this, but the car radio, the TV's and the satellite going screwy all at once seems strange. Maybe my Rick was letting us know he's still there. The car radio thing has happened now 4 different times, and my mechanic says there is no reason for this. He has messed with his daughter's new digital clock, and it keeps re-setting itself to 7:02. I have no idea what the significance of that is, but my coworker has had her clock turn to 7:02, and my sister's battery operated clock just stopped working. Kaput, even though she put in new batteries 2 days prior. (she is staying in the guest house that Rick built). It started working again the next day. It's now gotten to be a once every 2 weeks or so that something electrical happens. The vet who is treating my old St. Bernard with acupuncture asked me 'what am I doing?' I replied that she was shifting the energy. Then she asked 'what is the first law of physics?' I replied that energy is neither gained or lost, it merely changes form. BINGO! Just because this mortal body of ours can't see what our loved ones have transitioned to, that being pure energy, doesn't mean they aren't there. We just don't have the capacity to see them. But God Winks are all around us, we just have to pay close attention.
I've posted before about my Rick's MiniCooper's radio turning on and off before the key is inserted or removed, or the TV and radio in the house turning on and off by themselves. Well, today would have been Rick's 65th birthday.
I leave the radio on for the dogs while I'm at work. My mom was a bit of a 'cougar'- her long-time sig. other, Tom, was 20 years her junior, and HER song was Rod Stewart's Maggie May. Rick and I had an artisan marmalade and jam business, and when he went to get the personalized plates for the van, he wanted Jammin, but that taken, so he settled on Marmvan. Our theme song was Eddie Grant's We Jammin, I'd love to be jammin with you.........Guess what song was playing the second I walked in the door last night? WE Jammin, followed by Maggie May!!! So the both of Rick and my mom are hanging out together! My sister called last night about 8. I hung up, put the phone of the coffee table and went into the kitchen to feed the dogs. The phone then rang as the intercom......totally different ring tone and tempo. The other handset for the intercom is down in the cottage! Guess Who!!! Then this morning when getting up ( I still sleep on the couch) I looked at the TV/Sat remote on the coffee table, and it's all lit up! The buttons only light up when you touch it! What a wonderful God Wink to celebrate my Rick's birthday- he's just letting me know he's still here, even though I can't see him!
Peace to all today