My guess is that everyone here feels as " Half Of A Person / Couple ". Paul made up the other half of me. ... Am I now alone ? I hate being alone. ... What have you done to make yourself a bit more whole? Please tell me... Maybe I can try what you have.
Yes, coming here was a good move. People actually understand some of the things I feel. Of course your reply was helpful. To me, a reply means, " Someone understands where i'm coming from. " . :-)
I loved your post! You write so well, :-) You said several things I would love to say if only knew how to phrase them. But you did it for me :-) Thank You!
Making a list of things I liked about me THEN, and how I can be way that again, alone, sounds like a good start.
Thank You for your reply. It mean a lot.
This advice is spot-on.
Six years ago, I felt like the remaining half of a tree that had been struck by lightning and just waited for my side to fall over--but it didn't. I finally got out and tried different things. Some worked; others didn't. Just be patient with yourself when things do go as expected.
I also had to learn how to be "single" again after a thirty-five year relationship, and to trust myself to make the right decisions. I haven't been 100 per cent there, but I have learned from my mistakes.
I keep asking myself that, but I get the same answer every time. " I have no idea. "... Read the Post from JRVAL above. It's making me think. One thing she said to do , is to make lists. Lists what you do like about yourself and what you don't like. And work on it.
I think we have to MAKE a place for ourselves again. Make ourselves fit into the worlds again. I just have to stop and think HOW will I do that? So that's where I am right now. If we were all teenagers, I don't think any of us would have a single problem. Teens make themselves known, Make their points known. They don't care what others think. ( or so it seems ) I need that carefree lifestyle. But how do I get it ?
I get it, after Doug died, I had so much energy, I accomplished so many things. I got out there, joined groups. Met no one (friends) as I don't fit any where, too young to be a widow, not part of middle aged married people, joined a singles group of bitter divorced people. I had to come to the conclusion I don't fit any where & maybe I never will.
Now at 4 yrs the energy is gone. The desire to do something is gone, If I do vacuum or don't, who cares?
Had to go for a cancer test this morning. I hate medical things, I took my atavan & got thru it. Whether it comes back positive or negative. who cares. I pray I just don't have to live too long like this.
Summer is here & it just seems like an annoyance, now I have to mow, rake etc. At least winter is just shovel, go inside & watch TV. Now I have to listen to people go on how nice it is & they are going to the lake with their family. vacationing with their family. I am finding it very hard to pretend these days. I just feel worn down & done.
I sing anywhere, anytime. Sometimes I cry my eyes out afterwards, but it helps me get in touch with my feelings. I've been feeling quite numb and disconnected lately and singing helps me reconnect with something I love, music. My cats like it, it makes me feel better, and I could care less if people think I'm nuts, because I just don't care what people think anymore! What a liberating feeling. In general, folks seem to like it, and it's much cheaper than therapy!
Thank you for posting this, I'm sorry we all have to be here, but it's a good place and I'm grateful WV exists. Wishing us all a little peace and hope today.