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    My right foot has been bothering me for about 3 years. But it just got bad enough to see the Podiatrist.... He said my feet have Arthritis in them and some bone spurs. But my right foots hurts the worst. So Dr. Brock gave a Cortisone shot in my right big Toe Joint.  I didn't feel a thing. He froze the area.  But I was so close to tears anyway. Paul wasn't there to hold my hand... :-(  He always held my hand. So I texted my son... He said " Don't worry Mom, it will be like a little bee sting . " ...  Am I being selfish when I say " Where is Paul ? " shouldn't he be here taking care of me ?  Is this what I have to look forward to ? Being alone at moments when he was always right there with me ?  


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Not selfish at all. A couple of weeks ago I got really sick - was out three days. And I realized the last time I had been sick, Ed had taken care of me! So quite a few years ago. I was too sick to even go to the store for supplies. My coworker had her 92 year old mother buy some stuff and leave it on the bench outside my front door! But I kept wishing Ed was here to care for me. I missed him.

Hi Sissy,

I had my first medical test yesterday and while I had friends with me and I got positive results, the fear that I would face a major health crisis without Steve was overwhelming.  I just had to force myself not to go there in my head.  I think this represents one of the most difficult things for those of us here...facing the future and all of it's potential issues without the support of the person who has stood beside us all these years.  For some it means learning to depend on others - friends and/or family - and for many who are not blessed with a strong support system it means facing each crisis alone.  This is just one of the many facets of grief that we all have to deal with.  I hope your foot has improved.


Averysmom (Jackie)

Hi Sissy I'm knew here but just going to jump in. I've had several trips to hospital since my hubby died and like you feel more lost than ever. My kids couldn't be there because of the distance of where they work. Then took a taxi home and be alone feeling like crap. I hope it gets better xx

A different "first" without DH.  I haven't been able to get my bike (which he gave me in 2001) out on training rides because I'm afraid of what would happen if I got a flat.  I can't calll DH anymore and ask him to come get me and bring the bike rack!  Even with the bike fully overhauled and with special liners in the tires I just stuck to long cardio workouts at the gym.  The first of my long rides every year is always a little scary- I'm 64 and I know that I won't be able to do these forever, although I'd like to.

So this morning I had a 35-mile charity bike ride.   At least these are well-organized, with a number to call if you have a problem and volunteers who will pick up you and your bike.   It was a wonderful ride- perfect weather and free beer at the end.  My legs were a little rubbery at the end but that's normal.

I have an Uber account (haven't tried them yet) and also have to check to see if my state is one where AAA will provide service if you have bike trouble.  There aer at least 2 more of these rides I want to do this year and it's time to get my groove back!

Wow, Athena, good for you! A 35 mile bike ride? That's amazing. I know what you describe--we have to use our heads and think things through. Being alone can be not a good situation for a lot of reasons. I only walk on trails now that are well in view of others and always make certain my cell is charged.

I used to sometimes just walk around the neighborhoods but have fallen twice. The first time I was stooping to get under some low hanging tree branches that were wet from rain then made the mistake of jumping off the curb-fell down and had a hairline fracture of my ankle. My husband was still living do he came to get me. A couple years ago took another tumble over one of those wires that supports trees. Fell so hard I thought I broke the sidewalk! So no more walking the sidewalks. Are there any bike trails nearby that are well-traveled? It's probably not a bad idea to have someone go along if you can find someone, for safety reasons.

I did a 30 mile ride on Saturday.    Didn't feel that great during the ride,felt dizzy and nauseous.    Still I got through it and enjoyed the free IP'A at the end. I plan to go on another one this Saturday.

That doesn't sound good- did you stay hydrated?  Did you eat occasionally?  The rides I do always have stops with PB$J sandwiches, Gatorade, bananas, etc.  I also bring a GU packet or two- little foil packs of glucose laced with caffeine.  The "Chocolate Outrage" flavor tastes like hot fudge sauce!

I hope next Saturday's is a little easier.

They had four rest stops with water, bananas, orange slices, pb and j sandwiches and i stopped regularly for water.   I think it was pretty well covered.   I think I either caught a little bug or with it being windy, maybe it affected my equilibrium or something.    I will be on guard on Saturday.    I hope it goes well. 


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