A community of peers created by the Soaring Spirits Loss Foundation
I was blessed a couple weeks ago. My Brother makes sure I get out of the house on a regular basis. I went to watch him sing Karaoke. I happened to be video taping him when he got this HUGE grin on his face and pointed into the crowd. Well turns out he found his soul mate and I got it on tape. Reminds me of the night Steve and I met. We felt as though we had finally found an old friend that we hadn't seen in years.
My question...will it come around again? Or was that my one shot at soul mate and only one per customer, thank you very much, please move along? I AM SO SAD....
I had the same thought/concern after Brian died. I was 29 and the idea of being alone for the rest of my life was devastating, yet I could not imagine I'd ever have a love as strong as what we had or that any other relationship could measure up or compare. Still, I kept my heart and mind open and started dating again when I was ready. I'm glad I did.
I read somewhere (probably on this site!) some great insight on this very topic: "If I could find the soul mate for who I was then, who's to say I can't find the soul mate for who I am now, or who I will be in the future?"
I will say that no two loves are the same -- I love my boyfriend just as strongly and deeply as I loved my late husband. However, it's not like I "found love again" -- instead, I found a new love. This love doesn't feel the same as the love I had with my husband because there are different people involved and it is a different relationship. There are things about my current relationship that are better than my marriage, things that are worse, and things that can't be compared at all. Still, I am in love again, and believe I have found my soul mate for this stage of my life.
My heart goes out to you, shattered1, but take comfort in knowing that it is possible to find love again. It might not "feel the same" as your last love, but that doesn't mean it can't be just as deep, true, or satisfying.
Wendy, you are blessed! Thanks for sharing the hope.
I used to believe that we all had a "soul mate" out there....predetermined, "one per customer", end of story. I was lucky to find him and am grateful for the incredibly short time we were given together. But now I am 39 and facing the possibility of many years alone....and I sincerely hope that I was wrong. I know that I will never love anyone the way I loved my Rodney, but I do hope that I love someone again. I too believe we were meant to walk this earth in pairs. Maybe there is that someone who will be the "love of the rest of my life." Wendy, I love the point about the person we were before, and finding someone the soul mate for who we are now....makes sense to me.