This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

Here's a spot where you can post your special July remembrances - wedding anniversaries, birthdays, anniversaries of your loss, children's weddings, etc. - and discuss the plans you have to get through those potentially hard days. 

Views: 805

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

July 20th was always a special day for us. It was the day we met back in 1969. We were introduced by college friends. I was a young freshman not looking for a relationship and he was a senior getting ready to head out into the world. We had gone with separate groups of friends to an off campus student youth center to watch the Apollo 11 moon landing. This was back in the day students did not have TV in their dorm rooms. Some of his friends knew some of my friends. Next weekend a group picnic on Sunday afternoon. I remember the summer drizzle and the humid air that day. We were young and weather did not stop our plans. It started to rain and I was getting wet and my future husband loaned me the shirt off his back. About a week later after I washed and ironed the shirt I returned it to him. He fumbled with the shirt as he asked me on our first date. It is hard to believe how quickly the years since then have passed. He died in 2014 leaving me feeling that spending almost 45 years together was not nearly long enough.

On July 20th we would celebrate by doing crazy Moon related things--once we went to Goodwill and picked out all the old record albums with Moon songs on them. We took them home put them on the record player and danced to them all. Another year he surprised me in a restaurant with a violin serenade of Moon River. Not too long ago he gave me a CD with Michael Buble singing Fly Me to the Moon.

I do not know what I will be doing this year on July 20th...probably going to work and coming home to an empty house. I think telling you all our story is my way of celebrating the memory of our wonderful love.

I love your story, EileenJoy. Thank you so much for sharing your special love.

July 16 it will be 6 months since he passed away.  The world is so different without him in it.

Thank you for asking, it was a very hard day but I had the most amazing thing happen to me, it was about 10 am yesterday and I had been crying and asked my Mike for a sign that he was here with me. This is no exaggeration I came upon a VHS tape not labeled and I popped it in, it was my husband, we were on vacation 10 years ago and I was in Walmart in New Mexico around the same time. In the video he goes on to say I have dragged him to yet another Walmart. At the end of the video he says "I love Ya Kate, Happy Anniversary" I sobbed my eyes out. I never thought I would hear him say that to me again needless to say on our 25th Anniversary!

Oh my goodness,, what a wonderful gift your Mike gave you on your special day!

Love that you felt the love of your Jim on your special day.

Early in my loss, someone - can't remember where I heard or read it - suggested we hug ourselves.  I remember thinking at first that was silly, but one night when I was feeling low I wrapped by arms around myself as I laid in bed.  And it felt good. And I was able to sleep a bit, too. Perhaps now when you hug yourself you'll be transported back to this lovely dream.

Today, July 16 is the one year anniversary since Ervin passed away. We went to cemetery today, kids, cousins and PD friends and Vietnam buddies to send off 45 blue and grey balloons. 45 for the years together, blue his favorite color and grey for brain tumor awareness. I keep thinking of what happened last year and it is like watching a movie over and over. Sad but I will noy cry in front of people. I am sure when I go to bed it will hit me. Now the next year starts all over all the celebrations without him again.

We were married July 30, 1978. I met him in May of 1975, at age 20.

My beloved died on August 6, 2012 - one week after our anniversary. 

I am grateful for all of our good years, and raising 3 beautiful children. But I miss him so...I sometimes feel him sending me love and guidance. but I miss his comforting presence in "real" life. But of course, what is real? We will all leave this physical plane, so maybe this is actually "unreal."

But I miss him, and I still struggle to have routines that matter to me. I am grateful for 2 beautiful grandkids and my loving daughter and 2 sons. I am blessed. 

I hope and pray all of you will be comforted and blessed, day by day. I don't not know what I will do for our anniversary. Maybe I should go on a little trip? I also like the idea of random acts of kindness.... Or maybe one big gift in memory of him...

Love to you all,


Hi Mary - I really like your positive attitude and your thoughts that this life may be "unreal". I sometimes think the same thing.

   My first anniversary without my husband was this past May 29 . I planned to have a phone reading with a medium that day- so i could feel connected to him. It was wonderful. Then i invited my 3 kids  to eat dinner together. It was nice having them around me.

  I hope your day goes well.  Love, Yvonne

July 3rd...The date my life changed forever and I lost the love of my life 

July 28, 2015 will mark the 2nd anniversary of my husband's death to Stage 4 metastatic lung cancer.  I hope to face the day with strength, being positive, remembering the great times in our 37 years together.  My plan is to text each of my children, letting them know how very much they are loved.  To celebrate my  three beautiful granddaughters I have been blessed with since Jay died.  My life's journey, though difficult these last 3 years, has also been one of tremendous emotional growth for me.  I anticipate my future and am purposing to forge ahead as a single person with absolutely no clue as to  how to go about it.  I am forcing myself to attend concerts, other events locally and find that it becomes easier each and every time.  It is exciting to, at the age of just about 59, begin to figure out what it is I want to be when I grow up.  No longer a spouse, no longer a daughter, now a single woman forging her own way in this, my new journey of life. 

I am struggling at the present time with the death of my mom right before Mother's Day this year to lung cancer.  I have postponed grieving/mourning my mom. I now realize that I need to face July 28, 2015 first. 

Mt first birthday without my husband of 37 years and my best friend is July 25. I will be 60!   Such a big number and such a big loss. My sweetie passed 12/12/14 after a brief illness.

   I have been dreading it - but decided to take the bull by the horns and invite people to my house. I have a teenage daughter and 2 adult sons living at home. I invited 2 of my closest friends with their husbands and my siblings for dinner. I hope to laugh and enjoy life. I will work to do it and not be a victim to sadness.

  All of my life - my dear husband planned out really nice birthday celebrations. I feel bad that i took it so for granted and even criticized things at times. Now its time for me to do my life different. I really dont know how - but just put one foot in front of the other.


© 2019   Created by Soaring Spirits.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service