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Mother's Day and other triggers in May.
NOT for Moms only!
Share your experiences, memories, feelings about May.
On and around Mother's Day, pop in here once in a while and let us know how you are doing. Your friends will try to send you a little extra TLC.
Tags: May, Mother's Day, holidays, seasons
Views: 25
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by MissHIm11 on -
Mother's day will not be anything like last year. This will be my second Mother's Day as a mom but my husband is not here to help me celebrate. I really am not looking forward to it as my daughter is only 15 months old. I figure my mom and I can enjoy a nice day together inside.
Another trigger will be my baby shower that is planned for May 14th. I didn't want the shower but my friends insisted. I hope I can enjoy myself and not be sad and depressed the entire time.
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Permalink Reply by Dianne in Nevada on -
I hope you and your mom are able to have a nice Mother's Day together, Crystal. And although you're naturally worried about how you'll feel at the shower, I hope the day brings you some joy as your friends help you celebrate the impending arrival of your precious Jorge Matthew.
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Permalink Reply by Dawn- Clouds Mum on -
Mothers Day is going to be tough for me too. In some ways I am lucky that I am going to have my daughter and grandchildren here with me and as it is my first without Keith the company will be good. Depending on the weather we might just take the boys on a picnic down near the river and then a nice dinner at home.
I hope you and your mom enjoy the day together and it is tranquil for you.
The baby shower is possibly your friends way of trying to cheer you up. You never know it may turn into a special day for you after all. Try and enjoy it. I know that will be hard, but at least they are trying.
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Permalink Reply by Dianne in Nevada on
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May has a lot of potential triggers for me. May 4, 2006 was when we first heard the word cancer; May 5 was the spinal surgery that temporarily paralyzed Vern; May 7 was the bleed out followed by 4 units of the wrong blood that nearly killed him. This May will bring my first Mother's Day without Vern and my 60th birthday, and May also brings my dad's birthday and my mom's passing.
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Permalink Reply by Runnergirl on -
May certainly is filled with lots of triggers. It may help to deal with one at a times, trying to block out the others until the next trigger date. Rather that fight it perhaps you can plan to commemorate that date in a certain way--visit a special place, eat out or cook a favorite meal, get together with close friends. Then sometimes if nothing works I once decided I was just going to feel sorry for myself for a day--it happened to be our anniversary and I allowed myself to cry and stay in my robe all day. The next day I got dressed and went on. There's no one way and it is certainly not easy. Be kind to yourself and plan some self-care: spa day, favorite book, movie, etc.
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Permalink Reply by MsKris12 on -
I like your way of thinking-if you try and take all the triggers in at once THAT in itself is overwhelming! Taking one at a time is the best plan of attack. In addition, for Mother's day especially, I'm going to try and focus on others, my mother, my sisters . I am finding when I do that I don't dwell on my stuff to long.
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Permalink Reply by Runnergirl on
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Being of service to others helps me to get out of my head and not dwell on my pain or grief. It's easier said than done at times.
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Permalink Reply by NMWidower on -
Oye. May for me will always have several key dates in a row. The midyear anniversary occurs on May 5th (it will be 18 months) , then just a couple days later this year is Mother's day, and at the end of May (may 29th) is our wedding anniversary. Then a couple weeks later is my late wife's birthday (June 14).
last year this was a really tough gauntlet of "first" days. I dont think this year will be as tough, but I know it will still be a flurry of days that will likely tend to be emotional. Key dates just have a way of so clearly reminding us of the loss that its hard for them not to be emotional.
I think I will always feel sadness on mothers day as my kids really miss having a mom. I think we will plan on making something nice to take to "mommy" that day and maybe will send up a few balloons with messages to "mommy" too. My kids have liked doing that a lot.
Hope others find comfort in their tough days in May too...
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Permalink Reply by Momtofour on -
our triggers are the beginning of October till March 7th. In that time frame we have my daughter's birthday, his death anniversary, Christmas, our anniversary, the twins' birthday, his birthday, valentine's day and our youngest daughter's birthday. Those were always the 5 hardest months for me. I'm about to hit 19 months in a week...last month was a bit hard for me. Barry was never home much for mother's day, but he usually sent flowers or something. So its' not a huge deal to me. Father's day will be hard for us though.
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Permalink Reply by MsKris12 on
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May is full of triggers for me and I am bracing myself for each of them.
Mother's Day, my birthday (May 12) in our house Steve declared a birthday WEEK for each of us. We are treated special and get special treats each day for a week. Because my bday is at the same time Mother's Day my week lasted a bit longer! Our son graduates for high school and turns 18. Our niece graduates college and then gets married at the end of the month. Memorial Day-always a big deal at Beckhams Cove (self-named beach property of my Uncles-whom loved Steve and Steve loved him and the good times we had there)
AND-I will be moving into our new bedroom and bath next week. I have made it "my" space, but know that he would have loved it. (with the exception of the feminine touches on the wall and floral print chaise) I can't help by feel immense sadness and emptiness when I climb the stairs.
Blessings to everyone this month!
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Permalink Reply by Best66 on -
My anniversary is may 5th... im already shattered about it. Ive been crying at work almost everyday and cant seem to pull myself out of it. My mom lost my dad also so she and I will probably sty in bed watching old movies all day on mothers day.
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Permalink Reply by Runnergirl on
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My heart goes out to you. Staying in bed sounds like a good idea to me. Sometimes I go through my wedding album and relive the memories. On my anniversary one year I was at a gift shop and saw a coffee mug my husband would have liked so I bought it. Now when I use it, I think of him. Recently I dropped it and the handle broke. I tried gorilla glue but after the dishwasher, it came apart. I don't know if that's symbolic of something but I did get a good laugh.
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