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We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

There is music for unrequited love, music for found love, and music for lost love (break ups).  

It would be great if there was music for those who lost their loved ones to death.

When my husband died in 2016, someone here kindly suggested, Tell Your Heart to Beat Again.  Its not really about widowhood, but its the closest thing I am aw are of.

I wonder why we are ignored in the world of music, and how long it will be before someone thinks of us!

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The musician who wrote Tell Your Heart to Beat Again, Danny Gokey,  is actually a Young Widower, although he's remarried now, so I think the song does apply. Would be interested to see what other songs people think of. The first that comes to mind is Cole Swindell's You Should Be Here, which I think is about a friend he lost.

BabushkaD (Debbie) GOD this makes me sob. Like other tunes I've listened to me, they are all so sad and beautiful at the same time.

I've always found that There is always something to remind me by Naked Eyes, Photograph by Ringo and Otis Redding Thats how strong my love is apply very well to us.

I love this one - she wrote it for her late husband Ron.

Also this one

"Darkest Days" by Black Label Society ...

Both the music & video spoke to me as a widow in full on grief ...

There was a thread about this a while back

I got a lot of good ideas for songs for the memorial service, that I would not have known about other wise.

My Heart Will Go On, by Celine Dion and another beautiful song was The Prayer by Bocelli and Dion. The latter, not exactly what you look for but very inspiring and spiritual, worth hearing on YouTube.

That makes me sob all the more. It's beautiful and sad at the same time. Callie2, maybe it's because I've never had a dream of my beloved Marty since he died 6 months and 1 week ago? Maybe it's something else?

Sorry, Inside. We drawl comfort from different things. Those were two songs I related to during the early days of my own loss. As far as the dreaming goes—I don’t recall dreaming much about my husband early on, yet there were a lot of times I woke up talking to him. I truly believe that shock and or grief affects our brains in strange sort of way, maybe it’s self-preservation, don’t really know.

Maybe three years out, a friend of ours told me he came to her in a dream and told her he was OK. Why her, I do not know but I thanked her for telling me that. But then I thought, why not me? It was past year four that he presented himself in what I will describe a vivid dream. I had experienced this when my Mom passed and it was very similar. From that point on, there was a certain relief but not sure why. Again, they had both told me they were OK. Now, I am sure many will think this is crazy but it was and still is, very real to me. It brought me comfort. I don’t know how many others have had this experience but there are some that say they have experience Gods winks or other signals to those they left behind.  

Wish there was something I could do to soften the pain for all with recent losses, however, we need to go through this process by ourselves. A lot of people avoid talking to us early on— others will talk but are careful not to bring up the deceased persons name. They don’t understand that the mention of their name won’t make things worse for us—if it brings a tear to our eyes that is normal and quite OK. We don’t stop crying after the funeral. There are so many reminders of two lives that had been entwined for many years. There’s hardly anything that won’t resurrect a memory of some sort. This is grief. It is the most painful time in our lives but we need to feel all this in order to heal our souls and move ourselves forward in our lives. We are still living, still learning and loving. I think we learn a lot through the grief process—I truly feel another demension has been added to my own life. I would prefer to go back in time and live there  happily with my husband but since that’s not an option, I have to be grateful to have had him in my life and to have experienced his unconditional love.

I know the God winks well Callie2. Thanking God I get those just about monthly. Always comforting.

What you said, "I think we learn a lot through the grief process—I truly feel another demension has been added to my own life." That's a lovely way to reframe the pain and anguish in the grieving. Thank you.

Callie2:  When my best friend told me that my husband had visited her in a dream, I was honestly kind of mad.  Why her and not me?  But then when I thought about it some more I decided that it was a tribute to him that other people loved and cared for him and welcomed a "visit".  I know he loves me still and while such an experience would be nice, it's okay that I haven't had it.  

I have had several dreams in which he appeared but they were not particularly meaningful; he was just there.  In fact, one of them was funny to me after I woke up.  I dreamed we were riding in the car and chatting.  He told me he thought our son had spent way too much money on a big wine purchase.  I got very testy and said he needed to be less critical.  The funny part of this story is that the only time my son purchased a lot of wine was when he bought it for reception back here at the house after my husband's funeral!  

I also wondered why I never got any meaningful dreams with my husband in them.  I finally got my final "message.'  It was his goodbye.  The timing and other factors make me believe that he waited until I was strong enough on my own.  Any messages before that would have kept me hanging onto a life that I could no longer have.  


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