A community of peers created by the Soaring Spirits Loss Foundation
I'm not sure if I'm being selfish, obsessed, greedy or maybe just a little crazy. That's why I thought I would come here and ask all the people that can possibly understand my feelings and where I'm coming from.
It's now been a year sense KC passed and some family members are asking for some of his ashes. They want to put them in jewelry or what ever but I can't stand the thought of letting anyone have them and not know where every part of him is. I did have to necklace made for his Mother, one for both her sons she lost this year. But I made her promise that she either wills them to me or they are to be burred with her. I have this crazy idea that some time down the line someone wont know what this jewelry is and my husbands ashes put in a rummage sale or something. I Know that is crazy talk but I dreamed that it happened.
So what I'm really asking is, is it wrong of me to tell his family that they can't have any of his ashes? I will be with them all this coming weekend and I'm afraid that if I said yes to one then others will want the same thing. The worst part is I have to be with his sister that never came to see him when he was sick, didn't come to KC's service or even send flowers a card or anything. I wouldn't even go with her being there but we are having the service for my BIL. I love the rest of his family and KC's Mom and I are as close as any mother and daughter. I just don't know if it's fare to tell them all no and keep him all to myself or am I being selfish?
Thank you for any opinions you may have.............Lisa
Thank you everyone! I felt it was my choice but then I was wondering if maybe I was being selfish. After reading all of your words and thinking about it some more. I'm still so protective of him just like I was when he was sick. I still believe that's a big part of why I have a problem not having him all with me. Or I'm just still crazy but what ever one it is I'm not going to feel guilty about doing what I want. Love you all for your help! :)
Lisa....To be honest....I don't know what I'd do. You're the only one that can make that decision...but make sure it's something that you can be at peace with.
(((Hugs))) to you