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Where did the time go.  On October 30 it will be six years for me.  I still remember that day and what followed.  I never had a chance to say goodby and tell him I Love you.  My whole life changed in a minute.  I gave up my life in RI and moved to NC.  Things are different.  I bought a house and asked if my daughter and  spn in law if they would come.  They suffer from Mental Ullness.  I went back to work two years ago, tried dating, and went back to church.  Could someone tell me if it is normal to experience and remember all that happened on October 30 and after.  I would like to know if anyone is going through this.  This year is especially hard for me.  I always dreamed of celebrating my 50th with him.  Now I have to do it alone.  Looking for anyone to help me through this difficult time.

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On  September 19th it will be eight years for me. Each year as the anniversary approaches I suddenly seem to have total recall. Every year I think life has changed a little but the pain of loss is still there. I guess that is the price of love. We can only be as strong as we are able to be. I guess it depends on our circumstances. I think for me looking at photos and remembering the good times helps. Hope you can think of those good time now too.

I have a lot on my plate but it doesn't stop me from missing him.  I work part time in home care and travel.  Thank you for responding to me.  My life has changed but I will never get over my husbands loss.  I have pictres of him around me.  I remember the good times and thank you for the suggestion.

Celebrating 50 years when you are only half there is very difficult. My husband died just a few months short of our 50th anniversary. Someone suggested I do 50 random acts of kindness to help remember him, but that idea overwhelmed me.

As it turned out, the Oso mudslide occurred about then. We had lived near Oso in our younger years and knew some of the people involved and some who died. It was the largest landslide in our country's history. We have three children and two of them who still lived nearby helped with the recovery efforts. 

What did I do to honor our anniversary? I wrote three checks, $50 each. One each to the Oso fire dept., the local hospital, and to Search and Rescue. Each had a note of encouragement enclosed. It was hardly a drop in the bucket needed for the town, but it was a way my heart said we could help. It was symbolizing our three children (who were the best part of our marriage) and our 50 years together.

My suggestion is that you go someplace or do something meaningful to honor the 50 years you had together. It does not need to involve money. It can be a freebie, using only time. But do something that will help heal your heart.

I travel a lot but do to my job it is difficult.  I work in home care and my patients rely on me.  I thought this would help me heal my heart.  Your suggestion tp send money to organizations we believed in was great.  Thank you for the suggestion.

Over four years for me. Our 25th Wedding anniversary is on 10/14 (we were together 12 years prior to that).

I have taken the advice of someone that posted on these boards and do random acts of remembrance on our Wedding anniversary, Christmas, Janet's Birthday and February 3rd (the day she passed).

I take 10 blank cards and personalize each one with a positive note like "Enjoy the Day",  "It's our Anniversary" or something similar, sign it Janet, put $ 20.00 in each envelope and put them on the windshield of empty cars in Cape May (where we got engaged and married) and along the way. I do a few cars outside the Goodwill store as well.

What a wonderful suggestion.  I work in home care and live in NC.  I moved from RI five years ago.  I saw poverty in RI but nothing like NC. I will do that on the anniversary of my husbands death.  You made my day.

Finding the right car (not new or expensive ones) is harder than you think. 

I focus on older models, cars with baby seats and the occasional out of State vehicles.

 

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