This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

Just rises up and washes over me. Making me so scared. The world seems such a scary place. How do I live in it all alone? How do I keep going forward when half of me is gone?

Views: 79

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

Alma, I am so sorry you are experiencing anxiety. I have had a tremendous amount of anxiety over these four years since my husband died. Sometimes it feels crippling. It has gotten worse of late and so I am on several medications and seeing a therapist. Meditation and exercise helps as well

The situations in today's world and news just seem to heap worries on us.  That being said, we who have lost our spouse, have lost half of ourselves.  No one to talk to, to lean on, or support us.  Our worlds have imploded, and exploded leaving us lost, and adrift in sea of emotions with no compass to guide us.  We have to come to grips with our loss, accept our loss, and then rebuild a world (life) without our mate, and in some cases also without guidance.  That is no walk in the park!

Just going to the store shopping can be scary.  Taking your car in for service, filling out forms, getting something fixed around the house...  Going out side by yourself and be scary.  Without our "Rock" we constantly step out on thin ice and worry. 

As we move through the grief and become more reassured with ourselves and the things we do, we will become more settled and more capable. 

The more we do with other people the better we will become.  We need to get out, attend meetings, eat out, become a part of various groups, and soon we will be able to locate that personal compass that helps guide us, and use it.



Such wise words. Thank you.  does  not  get  easier  with  time  in  my  opinion  and  experience!    You  need  sufficient health  to  move  forward  in  the  outside  world  when  you  are  alone and  as  you  age it  becomes difficult   as your  abilities  dim  and  you  become  less  able.  I  have experienced  this the past  seven  years.  Yes,  it  is  extremely  scary  and  uncertain day  to  day but it  is NOT  impossible.  It  might  mean  no  bed of  roses  or  easy  way  to get  through  the  grief.  You have  to  accept  yourself  where  you are  and set  expectations  that are  in  harmony  with  your  ability-  as  you  age-  dreams  must  include  the  reality  of  what  you  can  do because  65+ is  different than  35+ or  45+ or 55+/  and  no  two  people  are  the  same.   It  sounds  so  trite  to  day  at  a  time  but it  is  true.  No  fast  quickie  way  to  get  to  the  other  side  of  grief.  Keep  busy  but  well  rested.  Do small  things  that  spark  joy for  you. Ignore  the  know-it-alls  who  really  haven't  a  clue but  preach  suggestions to  you.  Understand  your  feelings  are  worthy  and  real  BUT  your  truth  in  life  is  more  important- you  are  needed  and  loved  and  here for  a  reason in  spite  of  being  lonely  and  frightened.  Long  drawn  out  process with  both valleys  and  mountain  top  experiences-  all for  your  growth  or  your good.  Relax  and  understand  you  are  still  whole  and  capable of  healing.   In  fact  we  are  designed  to weather  life  and  reach  victory  all  in  good  time.  Believe  your  truth.

Thank you.


© 2019   Created by Soaring Spirits.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service