Since Doug died & people said so many stupid things to me, I always wanted to have a page where people who were left behind, could share the unbelievable stupid things said to them.
1) The day Doug suddenly died, my parents came over & said: "You wouldn't believe the week your sister has had" I replied, "Really, did her husband die today?" My father responded:" NO, but she had a bad week" & as usual we talked about my sister as we have my whole life.
2) At 24 days in, his best friend called me to say :"" Come on, I know he meant a lot to you, but come on. get over it"
3) 3 People told me I was lucky that he died & it wasn't a divorce.
4) The lady who bought all his RoughRider (football) stuff said: "I am sorry for your lose, but wow good for me"
5) I lost 50 pounds in 4 months after Doug died. I just stopped eating, as I had no interest in food. woman at work said: "Well one good thing about his death, you look great"
6) My boss after first day back to work: "I don't care what has happened in your personal life, we just want you to do your job"
7) When you tell someone else what someone said, the idiot replies, "Well I am sure the meant well" ????????????????????
I know what you mean. People tell me they "can waste hours on the internet" I would try to find something interesting and couldn't. I tape every show I find interesting, love my PVR. I channel search, & no commercials. Yesterday of course it snowed all day, again, it's getting so depressing. I got home after taking my dog to off leash and sat on the couch, curled up with my family (2 dogs, 2 cats) from 2pm to 9pm then went to bed.
I am amazed ho win North America "If we just work more" we'll feel better, Our society is so cold. As long as everyone is happy & no one bothers anyone else with their bad mood, depression, death in their family etc. life is good. Always "think positive" ??? Idiots. When people say "You decide to be happy" I rip them a new one. A person going through a spouse dying doesn't chose to feel miserable. Someone with depression wishes they could be happy. Wants a reason to live. I am so sick of people who have perfect lives not bothering to understand some us have trials in life.
Alone: I will be thinking of you lots, and praying for you.
Menufalls: I didn't even list them all just the top 5 or whatever. At the beginning I was basically speechless, but I also felt I couldn't' say anything back as I needed friends. I felt like I just had to put up being treated badly or the other choice was totally alone. I look back now & wished I told them all off, as they all vanished & quit being my friend any way even when I put up with the crap. After almost a year I started getting the nerve to say something back realizing if they were this rude & insensitive to me when my world just fell apart. I didn't want them in it any way.
Doug's sister was obviously fine way before I was even near crappy. I think they think that because it's their brother they are as close to that person as you are. I had to explain to her. She didn't see him every day, talk about her day. She didn't get it, but I tried.
Did your idiot manager read that book "eat, pray love"? It's only 4 months!!!! At that point I was just still in shock. So many people who have never gone through this think they have answers. We need a website that every person who has never lost someone HAS to read. Maybe then they'll wake up. The hardest thing for you right now is to be strong, I hope you know someone who has gone thru this to talk to. I know I wish did.
I thought of this thread today when I was reminded of a woman who said to me, "That poor boy will have to live w/it the rest of his life. I'll pray for him to heal"
This was in response to telling her ìt was 3 months since Bob had been killed by a 19yr old road rage driver who was deliberate in his actions as well at his sentencing gave us a backhanded apology blaming my husband ...
I wanted to kill her, but started vomiting instead ...
WOW!!!People just never cease to amaze. Our society is so cold & stupid. When one of their loves ones dies I always think, I hope you encounter nicer people than I did.