Members

This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

Does anyone else do this? I lost hubby on Dec 12 this year. Now, I find myself talking to hubby, aloud or in my head, as I do something. Like, what do you think, maybe this one, huh? Or, okay, let's go get some veggies, I have to try cooking and eating something today. As I'm "talking", I feel good, in the sense that I'm calm and rational. However, I'm wondering if I'm in a state of denial without knowing it. If so, I want to discontinue this habit.

I would appreciate any opinion. Thank you.

Views: 612

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

I took a walk this morning and I told him where I was going. I do ask him stuff too and I also tell him (tell!) to let me know what he would do if he were me. Somehow, I think, our minds are still meeting and what I end up doing is partly due to our "connection". 

Very sorry about your recent loss.  Like a lot of others, I don’t find this unusual or unwise, especially if it helps.  I used to do it too a lot at first, but you know even now at eleven years I sometimes ask for his help.  Especially when I misplace something— he was always good at finding things!   If I have to make a tough decision, I ask him what to do.  Then, on really rare occasions, I ask why he had to go and leave me, this is so unfair!

It is a difficult adjustment in so many ways even not considering the heartache—in many cases it leaves us with no one to talk to.  Sharing our innermost thoughts or even something mundane, there is a void there.  Talking to our spouses does not sound unusual and I don’t think it is harmful.  We do whatever helps us get by.

Well, I'm getting used to talking to hubby.  First thing in the morning, as I'm preparing for bed, and throughout the day. Feels normal now to "connect" with him except in a different way. He's on the other side looking over and I'm on this side, but we're still together. 

Maggie, welcome to the awakened way. The veil is thin. He is still right here.  Bright blessings.

You've spoken of the veil before. What is that about, if I may ask?

My belief is that the world between the living and the transitioned is but a thin veil.  We and they live at different vibrational energy levels.  I believe when one crosses, it's simply like opening a door and walking into another room.  Continue talking to your hubby.  He hears you.  

This is beautiful. I believe they all hear us too. 

Thank you! I do believe that all beings (living and passed on) are made of vibrational energies.

Hi Maggie,

I am 4 1/2 years out, I still talk to Arlene in the house and sometimes out and about. I also at times think I hear her voice, but that might be my brain (such as it is) protecting me. Thinking I hear her started for me in the 1st month (June 2015). I was at work and getting ready to have a meltdown, looking for a plce to do it, when I first thought I heard her talking to me, this started a conversation in my head with her, where she assured me that I was not imagining things. Was it for real? I choose to believe it was. Would anyone outside of this "existence" understand it? Not very likely. All I can tell you, is if thats what you do, then go with it till it doesn't work for you anymore or just stop it without realizing you stopped it. 

Don, love your post. I've received many signs from Stephen, especially in the first six or so months.  A few people I've shared these with looked at me as if I had two heads, so now I only discretely discuss with like-mined people.  The signs from our loved ones across the veil can be very distinct or very very slight.  They can come, then go away for a very long time (after all, they are busy too).  Trust your heart.   ~Shirley

Well, Don, so far, I've been saying good morning and goodnight every day and in between, I talk to him in my head or aloud as if he was still here. That's what I would have done in the past anyway. It's good to know I'm not having a meltdown. Thanks!

An interesting topic being discussed here.  I also talk out loud and in my head to my wife.  Unfortunately the conversation has been one sided and I keep looking for some kind of validation.   I wish and ask her every day for some kind of sign.

RSS

© 2020   Created by Soaring Spirits.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service