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Every where I turn it seems there is something that reminds me of him and what I don't need to buy anymore. Whether it's a potato chip flavor or a snack or product that was only for him. It's overwhelming.

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Four years later I see things at the store and think I should get that for Janet.

Glad I am not the only one.

Every time I see coffee ice cream in a store's freezer section, I immediately think of Judith...even in Year IX.

So it's just one more forever thing. Instead of hurt I hope someday it makes me smile.

Possibly...but that will depend upon you. Grief morphs into sadness and wistfulness over time, but eventually you will be able to think of your husband and smile--I just can't tell you when that will happen. Hugs in the meantime, as you work through your grief.

At  seven  years  though  it  has  not  gotten  softer  or  easier  for  me  at  all...I still  love  to  cook  and  married  to  an Italian  I  mastered  a  lot  of  recipes  to  please  him- some  of  those  I  still  make  and  I  no  longer  cry  remembering  his pleasure in  eating  them...instead  I  recall  precious  memories  as  I  cook  and  talk  to  him laughingly  wondering  if  souls in heaven  require  nourishment-   lol  of  course  they  do  not  but  these  private  times do  become  sweeter  with  time  so know  that  your  memories  will  solidify  and  find  a  resting  place  deep  in  your  heart  and  that  will  support  and  lessen  your  grief.   Every day  dozens of  things  bring  him  and  the memory of  him  to  mind...but  as  time  passes  I  find  many  loved  ones  who  have  died  return  to  me  in  things  and  places  and thoughts  because  we  shared  love....I  miss  them  all  but  ever  so  grateful  they  were  in  my  life  at  one  time.  Reminds  me  to  be  kind  as  there  are  people  who  still  need  our  love.  Sometimes  strangers  we  briefly  acknowledge  are  blessed  by  a  smile  or  a  greeting.  Life  is  good- even  when  grieving.   You  will  weather  this  fresh  grief  as  many  have  done  before  you.  Let it take  it's  course and  give  it  time.   We  understand-do share  if  it  helps  you lessen  the  overwhelming  pain  you  experience.   Buy  something  small  neither  he  nor  you ever  bought  before-  there  is  still  newness  in  life  waiting  for  you  to  show  you  the  way forward   as  you  grieve.

Thank you. Such a beautiful and kind post

You  are  welcome.  It's  only  words but  behind  them,  like  so  many  others  who  post is  compassion because  (I) /we  have  all been at  your  stage of  grieving and  know  how  deeply  it  hurts.   laurajay

A couple of times in the first few months, I came out of the supermarket and headed for the passenger side of the car. Tears ensued.

Now when I make something good to eat, I hear Frank's words, "Good fare." I talk to him sometimes when I am cooking, baking or eating.

My husband and I were married just shy of 50 years. Six years ago he passed. Even tho I am in another relationship since then, I still "talk" myself through some recipes that I've used for years. "Forget putting in the mushrooms because he did not like mushrooms" or "Add extra garlic (or black olives) for him". Funny how our memories work, even with a new partner and in a different house and city.


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