A community of peers created by the Soaring Spirits Loss Foundation
Went back to hospital unit where my widowhood began. Anyone else ever do this?
Yesterday I did something I have wanted to do for 18mos. I went to visit my sisters and brothers in the Trauma Intensive Care Unit(TICU) at RI Hospital. This staff was amazing in their care of Brian and in thier care of me during Brian's 4weeks there. Because Brian could not talk to me I spent so many hours talking to and getting to know them. And they got to know me too. I wanted there to be conversations going on as much as possible in case he did ever come out of the coma. I wanted him to hear me talking about him to all of them and to hear laughter and his chatty ole Kathy doing what she does best.
During this time and looking back now...they gave me my first real glimpse of HOPE. Hope that Brian would recover and when that ended Hope that I could go on with my kids.
After I walked out the day we let Brian go I was nervous about going back but I really wanted to give them something. I tried to figure it out...picture of us....picture of a tree I took when I was there at the hospital....a plaque. Then one day Michele Neff hernandez posted a picture of "Hope Matters" written in the sand on Myrtle Beach..PERFECT! So I got it printed and framed and presented it to them yesterday. I spoke and cried a little and was greeted with some of the most long awaited hugs I could have imagined. I was at first worried when we headed to the actual unit for the presentation but despite the sad end to Brian's treatment there...the TICU holds the feeling and faces of Hope that started me on this journey.
I was also overwhelmed when I saw that another family member of a patient there after Brian was appaled by thier old waiting area(It was horrible and many people sleep there to be near thier loved ones) and got all the waiting areas in the hospital updated and all the furniture donated and it looks amazing. I was so happy that new families don't have to deal with was there before.
They loved the picture and are placing it right by the entrance to the unit. Right where I would have put it and so that everyone who enters will see Hope right away.
It also makes me think I want to volunteer on that unit in some way.
Views: 64
Replies to This Discussion
-
Permalink Reply by EverydayMorning (Sam) on -
I think that's a great thing, and I'm so glad you were able to do this.
Its only been 3 months since my Patrick died, but I've thought about what I want to take the amazing staff in the ICU. I The day after Patrick died, the kids and I took up a box of chocolates to the ICU staff and his cardiologist office. It was my way of showing them that I didn't blame them. Things don't always go the way we plan or hope, and I know this was what happened with Patrick.
One of the sunset pictures I took while we were in Oregon, the kids and I decided we wanted to add an inspirational quote to it and get it printed out in a poster size to hang on the wall in our dining room. I thought that would be a great picture to give to the ICU staff when I'm able to bring myself to go back to the hospital.
-
Permalink Reply by srm541 on -
Oh how my heart skip a beat when I saw your post, Tears, ((((hugs to you))) Lady.
I did this in what was almost a year of my Gerry's passing. My good friends, son was in the ICU , and I just knew I had to go and support her, as she did I. To my amazement, I felt a since of peace about it once I was there. Like it was all the pain and sorrow had gone, just a for a while. As I knew he was no longer suffering and with his heavenly father.
Thank you, for the post. I just now dealing with other new grief issues. Will they ever end., the answer is, Yes
HOPE MATTERS.
-
Permalink Reply by bj628(Bonnie) on -
I have gone to Hospice House several times, Usually with chocolates & a card one time flowers and a Card. The hospce house here has 12 private rooms. We were there almost a month. The staff & Volunteers there are Awsome. Though it was horrible time.. We made many Happy Memories. My step daughter was there also for the last weeks. We became very close through this also.
They are true angels there,
-
Permalink Reply by Sherbear on
-
Just 5 months after Dave passed away, my mother was hospitalized and was on the same floor that Dave was when he recieved the news of cardio myopathy. He didn't die there in the CCU but this was the beginning of the end.
As I exited the elevator and realized what floor I was on, passed the CCU and continued onto my moms room I was filled with grief and anxiety. I shouldn't have been there. I could hardly speak with the doctors and nurses.
I couldn't go back anymore. My brother dealt with the hospitalization from there on and also into Hospice care.
I'd never reacted like that before.
-
Permalink Reply by CharliesGirl on -
When I was writing other thank you notes after Charlie died, I sent notes to some of the nurses In the CCU. I included a picture of him so they would know what he really looked like without the tubes and IV lines and swelling.
About 6 weeks after he died I had requested a meeting with two of his doctors. I needed a few explanations and clarifications. The meeting was in the same hospital complex, so afterwards I stopped in the chapel and then took the familiar elevator to the CCU on the 8th floor. Usually when I went up I was still hopeful and when I came down (especially the last time) I was not.
My plan was to visit with some of the nurses. However, I never made it into the unit. In the same waiting rooms I had frequented for a month were all the family members of the new patients. Many had just been given some new devastating news. Some were sitting on the floor in the hallway crying. I could go no farther. I ran back to the elevator and left.
Yes, Charlie received good care there from good people, but he also died there. I pray I will never have to go there again.
Julie
This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people
Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.
Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.
We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."
HOT TOPICS!
© 2013 Created by Supa Dupa Fresh.
