I am not a kid anymore I am 66. The last time I dated was 45 years ago. I am not sure that I want to date yet but am thinking maybe in the next year or so.
In the meantime I need a lot of help in HOW to date at my age. In the '60s as a late teen and in my early 20s I met most of those I dated at dances, I went on Friday and Saturday night around a country dance circuit. Now if I meet men it is mainly as part of a couple and not as singles.
I don't want to go into online dating or go to a meet up I am not ready for that. But I would like to find someone to go to the movies etc with.
Tell me your own experiences or where did you find that someone special?
Thanks for mentioning the part about your husband's ashes. I did the same thing when I went to Africa a few years ago. (Judith and I had talked about a trip to South Africa just a few months before she died. She had also wanted to go to Kenya or Tanzania.) I took some of her ashes with me and scattered them at a few locations when I went to Zambia, Zimbabwe, Malawi and South Africa. I don't know if she'd approve of my actions, but *I* certainly felt better that I did this.
Thanks, callie2! I know I'm blessed in many ways; have traveled beyond what I ever dreamed I could do and still more adventures to come. Ron and I were truly soul mates in that respect; we both loved travel and were willing to spend more modestly on cars, restaurants, etc. because travel was a priority.
One of the Soaring Spirits moderators has suggested a moderated chat on the subject of travel, so stay tuned!
Athena53 - I too loved to travel with my husband and have since travelled solo once or twice. It was sort of depressing, eating alone, feeling a little nervous by myself at attractions etc. I'd love love love to hear your take on how to do it more successfully, I just can't imagine sitting home and not getting up and going - I have the means to do it modestly and the definite desire to be out looking around this great world of ours. My husband would definitely be cheering me on!!! Tips, info would be much appreciated!!!
Angeldawg, I'm not crazy about sitting alone in a restaurant either. Ron and I tended to have a fast lunch somewhere or even just snack as we went along, then buy stuff for dinner and bring it back to the room. It was a nice way to unwind at the end of the day and it saved money. In Iceland I rented an Airbnb so ate most of my meals in my apartment- I loved that and will definitely use Airbnb again. I also realized I was taking more organized excursions- this gave me some interactions with other people. One friend from HS who travels a lot for his job said he tended to get into conversations with the locals (at least the ones who spoke English) and had really had some enjoyable interactions, but I'm a little more introverted.
My trip to Central America was a small-ship cruise (the line is called UnCruise). Mostly married couples, with a few singles (including 2 widows who were in their 50s and happened to be cousins). The married couples weren't stuck together 24/7; one might be up for the early breakfast while the other slept in or attended the 7 AM yoga class. One might be on my hike while the other went kayaking. So, I never felt like a fifth wheel.
Posting on FaceBook helped, too, although I realize you're advertising that you're away from home. I liked telling friends and family what I was doing/seeing and getting their reactions.
I haven't been very active on these forums but have browsed them pretty frequently. I'm 60, and my husband died three years ago. I haven't been remotely interested in dating until today, actually. A very good friend of mine wants me to meet her boyfriend's brother and go on a blind double date with them. I'm OK with that, but I'm also feeling very insecure about myself. I think I'm reasonably attractive and intelligent, but I'm also about 40 lbs overweight, and, well, I have a 60 year old body. I'm not sure anyone would be interested in me and all of my flaws and still accept me the way my husband did. Does anyone else have the same insecurities?
I think we all have those insecurities! Let us know how the double date goes. It would be nice to go out that way , less stress than the first time out with a stranger. I've mostly dated men I have known for a while. Not that I have had a lot of dates. I am 70 and have been a widow for five years.
I would be surprised if ANY of us women on the shady side of 60 DIDN'T have those insecurities!
And, unless you're in cougar territory, the guy is going to have a similarly-aged body. At this age, I expect sexual attraction to build up slowly as minds connect.
Thank you ladies for your replies and for understanding my insecurities about my physical appearance. How sad is it though, that we as women still feel judged on the way we look. We should be seen as the strong, independent women that we are who as widows have looked at the death of our partners in the face and survived. I will let you know how this "date" goes. Haven't been on one of those since 1981. Wow.
Just go with fun on your mind...not a sexual anticipation or physical contact and it will be worth your time just to laugh again with a man. Men wanting young, slim, attractive women and not caring about experience or compassion or capacity to love or intellect~ are shallow and not worth wasting time with...BTW We only get less physically attractive as we age...but cleanliness and charm can be claimed and used to keep things going. Have fun. You are created with perfection if you love. Be blessed and assured. You are beautiful.
If he turns out to have a pot-belly, scraggly beard. excessive tattoos or and talks about his boat, motor cycle, dog or bucket list...fain a headache and go back home!
or stick it out and you can have the last laugh! lj
laurajay..what a wonderful way to go into dating.....I do agree and have met many men my age that are very unkept...in need of a haircut, shower, and clean shirt......the motorcycle and dog also take all of their time...I have come across the same..but ..have to draw the line at Tattoos...My late husband had 22......on different places of his body..they were all in good taste and meant something......he was absolutely beautiful.....6' 185 #......aqua eyes.......cleaner then any man I ever knew, neat as a pin..always well dressed and neat in our home...hair cut every 3 weeks to keep it neat....so his tattoos had nothing to do with his appearance or personality....I have two.....a basket of flowers on my calf with my deceased daughters name written under it....and a B in script and a small peace sign on the inside of my left wrist in memory of my late husband Bill.....he is at peace now after suffering like no human should suffer for almost 4 years before he passed....so I just wanted to throw in that Tattoos don't make or break a person...some of us with tattoos have better manners, are caregivers, helpers , kinder and more gentle then a lot of other.....Peace..
Slick...just MY dislikes not meant to ruffle any feathers! I'm sure some people like dogs, pot bellies, motor cycles, and bucket lists too.. My point was if right away someone doesn't come close to YOUR personal expectations or likes-- keep your sense of humor and keep looking. Never settle and make the most of the new experiences before you...but don't sacrifice your values or preferences just to please someone...Again, my opinion. Peace as well.