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I am not a kid anymore I am 66.   The last time I dated was 45 years ago.  I am not sure that I want to date yet but am thinking maybe in the next year or so.

In the meantime I need a lot of help in HOW to date at my age. In the '60s as a late teen and in my early 20s I met most of those I dated at dances, I went on Friday and Saturday night around a country dance circuit.  Now if I meet men it is mainly as part of a couple and not as singles.

I don't want to go into online dating or go to a meet up I am not ready for that. But I would like to find someone to go to the movies etc with. 

Tell me your own experiences or where did you find that someone special?

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Got some hugs at church on Sunday, everyone was in a happy mood and passed the "love" around. First time for a few weeks.....sigh.  My son and granddaughte  did give me hugs while they were here. I do miss those family hugs, it is a pity they live so far away.

Just had a week in hospital for an infection in my melanoma affected leg. Once again when the social worker asked if I would like her to call anyone beside my daughter who is my power of attorney I realised there is no-one else to call. I knew my daughter would call her brothers and I could message a couple of my friends but who else needs to know?  It is one of the dilemmas for those of us who are widows or widowers who have not partnered up again. For me it is a REAL lonely feeling.

For those of us without children, it's both lonely AND difficult.  Even for something like a colonoscopy, having a friend come with you is just not the same as having your spouse there.  I had to have mine done in a hospital setting because they arbitrarily decide if your BMI is above a certain point you have to have it done in the hospital rather than the outpatient clinic.  It's nice to have a friend to take you, but it's not the same as having a spouse there.  My husband had me there through both of his concurrent illnesses, but if I get cancer or some other illness, he won't be there.  I recently took a woman I'd never met before to hers.  She'd had to resort to posting on NextDoor to try and find someone.  My sister will step up to the plate when she is in town, but she travels a lot and she believes in the Great Medical Establishment Conspiracy and that being vegetarian and doing yoga is guaranteed to prevent cancer, so I don't know how much help she'd be.

Hi Sue,

I hope that by the word "had" and that you posted here, that you are home now.  I hope you don't try another repeat just so you can sample the hospital's food.

When I had my gall bladder attack, it was the absolute worst and most intense pain I've ever felt.  I was transported to the hospital where I was scanned and X Rayed and sampled my first cocktail of drugs for the pain.  Honestly I was so sick I never thought about being alone, I was too miserable.  Then, I went to see my family doctor who sent me immediately to see a surgeon.  By the time I saw him the pain had been gone for 3 days and I was my normal self.  He quickly squashed my feelings telling me that I had to have the surgery and that I could walk down the stairs to leave the building and I'd have another attack.  I said "is this afternoon too soon?"  He did it two days later.  So there I was dressed in the very latest chic hospital gown, on the gurney and answering all sorts of questions.  The nurse noticed that I was really nervous and seemed frightened.  She found out I was a widower, and that I'd never been in a hospital before.  I was there for Susan for virtually all of her surgeries, recoveries, and traumas, and here I was all alone.  It was frightening to be on the receiving side of the experience.  She patted me on the head and told me I'd be fine, and that she was going to give me something that would take the edge off my worries so that I'd be more up for the surgery.  I saw her start to administer the drug and when I woke up, there was a different nurse and I asked her when they would take me off to the OR.  She laughed and said I'd already been there and they done that, and that I was in recovery.  This was supposed to be a same day surgery, but, it was more involved, the gall bladder had folded over on itself and become gangrenous so they kept me for 3 days on IV antibiotics.  Where was my other half when I needed her, yapping it up with St. Peter and the gang!  That was a terribly lonely experience. I sure could have used her reassurance and tender touch.  Being sick and by yourself is no fun! 

HUGS

Frank

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