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I had a person who was in the throes of divorce tell me that MY loss was "beautiful and romantic." My husband was dying of cancer at the time.

 

I felt sorry for her, and so, she went un-punched.

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Definitely doesn't make the top of the list, but it was the first thing that came to mind.  Let me preface by saying that I'm not often tolerant of or nice to telemarketers, or even customer service type phone calls in general, my thinking is if I wanted to talk to you, then I'd call you, and if you want to contact me send me a letter or an email, don't call me at home.  Anyway that said, after my wife's passing, if people would call looking for her if they asked if she was available I'd reply not really being as she's sealed in a box six feet underground, if they asked if the could speak to her I'd reply that she's no longer able to speak, and I won't lie, I did get a certain sense of satisfaction from the quick sorry to bother you or whatever preceded the termination of the call.  One day a particularly ballsy telemarketing woman actually answered with "are you serious or just playing with me" to which I replied with a short synopsis of the most horrific aspects of battling leukemia and ending up buried in a cemetery.  She apologized and offered her condolences before hanging up.
ok Peter ... I just laughed at this!! I totally get it!

Love it!  I do chuckle @ the shock some people express when I say, "No, Duane can't come to the phone/door, etc. because he's DEAD!"

I did that too!

I have done that too!  With my grandmothers passing as well as my husbands. The sound on the other end of the line makes my day :P

About those phone calls and junk mail--I have a friend who, when he got calls asking for his DW would say, "No I don't know where she is, but I have a phone number where you might be able to get some information."  And then he'd give them the number of the funeral home.

 

With my DH, I still got collection notices for a bill he never owed in the first place.  I started writing on the envelope, "No longer living at this address."  I was able to do that, laughing and not crying, because it was like my husband's sense of humor back in the days before he was sick. 

 

I need to work this out with the bill collectors!

I FOUND OUT THAT ANY BILLS MY WIFE HAD IN HER NAME ONLY, i WASN'T RESPONSIBLE FOR.

I CONTACTED THE COMPANIES EXPLAINING THAT SHE HAD PASS ON AND THEY WERE QUICK TO HELP ME.

SHE HAD NO ESTATE, NOTHING IN HER NAME THAT REQUIRED BEING PROBATED, SO THEY HAD NOTHING TO GET.

LOOK INTO THIS, EVEN IF IT ONLY GETS RID OF ONE BILL, IT'S BETTER THAN NOTHING.

I know exactly what you mean.  I talked to my husband WC attorney.  Between the two of us we came up with this -- I wrote on the envelopes "Deceased, return to sender" and guess what, I got no more mail from the bill collectors. 
I started doing that too- and it works!!

Ah, well. That didn't work in my county in Texas. I not only had to pay the bills that were in his name, I was stuck for his law practice debts because the minute he died I because the president of the law firm, unable to bring any money into the firm, but responsible for paying off what was owed.

Yes Texas does have some stupid laws, Skylark.  Some have been on the books forever.  Where in Texas do you live?  I live in Dallas.

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