This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

I had a person who was in the throes of divorce tell me that MY loss was "beautiful and romantic." My husband was dying of cancer at the time.


I felt sorry for her, and so, she went un-punched.

Views: 91931

Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

Yes Texas does have some stupid laws, Skylark.  Some have been on the books forever.  Where in Texas do you live?  I live in Dallas.

Let me know if you do Paula because I would enjoy that very much.  You are in Carrollton so you can't be all that far from me.  I am in Northwest Dallas in the Walnut Hill Webb Chapel area.

Maybe we could meet for breakfast at the Mecca on Harry Hines or for lunch at the Wild Turkey on Walnut Hill.  Both places have great food.  The Mecca has gotten a little bit high.  Jim had said that the last time he did breakfast there it was around $10.00.  Then there is Mama's Daughter on Harry Hines and they are pretty reasonable.


I am in Texas, too, and trying to figure out what debt I'm legally responsible for.  I just posted this message somewhere else on the site and friend requested you.  Any insight as to how to handle medical debt specifically would be immensely appreciated... 

So I'm sure many of you have been where I am now and I don't know the site that well so maybe I should have searched for other threads first.  But I came home to a follow up letter from a lawyer telling me I owe $10,000+ in outstanding medical bills (from just one hospital) despite my last legally guided response letter stating that there is no estate.  I lost my husband about 9 months ago after his 13 year battle with cancer.  I missed the first 10 years of his fight.  I'm 35 years old and live paycheck to paycheck and thought that I somehow escaped the debt collecting run around.  Some of the alleged charges date back several years before my husband had to file bankruptcy from all of the mounting medical debt.  Some are when I know for a fact he was under my insurance which I thought had everything covered.  Just thinking about going back to those thick files and jumping into this fight is exhausting.  There are people close to me in my life that I can't even bring this up to because I assured them that I would be financially okay and that following my heart would not result in financial ruin.  Like there isn't enough to deal with already.  I'm sorry - I'm just frustrated and mad and scared and alone.  This could be the first of many.

Do you think this applies to a Mortgage?  I have not told them he died in 16+mos because I am afraid since I'm not on the Mortgage that they will take the house from me.  I am actually talking to a financial planner soon and trying to figure out if I can buy something smaller in the next year or so.(Not putting my name on the mortgage was a mutual decision since we wanted to refinance in 2007 but my credit was awful)

I had the same problem, I had my name put on the deed but it is not on the mortgage. Of course I am paying the mortgage. I am in NY I know i didn't have to pay my hubby's cc bill but i did out of respect to him. He hada great credit rating and helped me though major hospitalizations. I never thought in my wildest dreams he'd be diagnosed with cancer and be gone in a little over 3 mo. 

Check and see your state laws. I live in Wisconsin , and as his legal wife with grown children I was the sole heir, and went through probate. If the spouse had kids from a different marriage then it gets more complecated. But check, free information on ask a lawyer, you get 1 free question , but the answers are posted to others questions as well. I felt better going in, for probate as I had an idea. Wisconsin is a community property state ( means you own jointly if married).Our morgage stated a single male , we bought our farm before we were married, he had the credit rating I did not. In small towns this is very normal. Good Luck I have been a widow 17 months .

I've had the same thing with 2 credit cards in my husband's name only. The companies acknowledged that I wasn't responsible, but then offered to cut the bills in half!!!!! Then they called my daughter who lives out of state wanting to know about probate. Like you, there was nothing that required probate. They still send me a letter every so often. I save them, but don't respond. My husband passed away almost a year ago. I am wondering when it will stop.

I gave them the address and phone number to where my hubby was buried. If they had any problems they could contact him there, but I doubt they would get a call back from him... :/

I've been told that and I've also been told I must pay them.  I'm confused is this true in every state?

My husbands favorite at his business bank called me when she saw the obit in the paper and alerted me I should close the account and that it was sole owned by him and not under anyone else's responsibility. I appreciated the heads up. Turns out our MC and discover was the same and since they weren't willing to change it to my name, I won't be paying them either. Being a "signer" doesn't show you are responsible.
I told someone that they could go to the cemetery anytime they wanted to talk to my late husband and if he responded please tell me how to get in touch with him.



© 2019   Created by Soaring Spirits.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service