My husband died on Aug 28, unexpectedly..
I have a grief counselor- her husband passed away at 47 years of marriage too and so, she traveled this path. I do have a grief group, 4 widows 1 widower. Most a little bit different journeys because all were caregivers for spouses for 1 to 5 years. Still, this helps a little. Marty, he went in for a routine hip surgery, like he did 6 years ago. He came home for my caregiving for just 2 weeks. Then rushed to
Marty, he went in for a routine hip surgery, like he did 6 years ago. He came home for my caregiving for just 2 weeks. Then rushed to hospital and after 28 days he died. A new book announcement came in
A new book announcement came in a Email, Its Ok that You Are Not Okay: meeting grief and loss in a culture that doesn’t understand. The author was widowed around 38 years old. Her husband died when swimming one day. I find some solace in knowing that I am not crazy. The world as I knew it is in
I find some solace here and in this book, in knowing I am not crazy. The world as I knew it is in a gazillion pieces, there’s no way the pieces can fit together, there’s no way pieces lost can be replaced, and the pain is relentlessly excruciating.
Most of the pain is in the evening and early morning - we each retired just 2 years ago and whether we were home or even traveling, we had settled into a lovely and loving routine around those two parts of the day. During the day we each went our way. But now during the day, no matter what time, I can go from simply walking from one room to another, forgetting or even remembering why, but like just a few minutes ago, then burst into tears, sometimes full sobbing.
I've been here about a week or a little more. And I am sorry I am although happy to find it a place of understanding and help.
I am responding to this because I have very similar feelings. First, so sorry for your loss. It is so new. My husband died in 2015 and after throat cancer. We had been married 47 years and were also just retired. I understand the feelings you expressed of seeming to feel lost without him. I feel the same way even now....I guess I manage it better at times now than I did, but the intense pain is still there. It's that loss of someone to share all the little moments, the intimacy, etc. That is a huge hole in your life and I wish I had a solution for you. I think connection is one thing that is important and that is why I am here....good thoughts to you, jan
Jan I am so sorry for your loss. It's losing so many parts of me that he was. I think my last list count was about 27 things, and of course I'm sure I've missed more than that. It IS a huge loss in my life, and I know you know. Thank you Jan.