Born in the 40s or earlier

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Comment by Maggie gram on April 14, 2012 at 3:47pm

Why is it that everyone seems to know what is best for you better than you do.  My daughter-in-law says they can not bring their children over to see me because I live in an apartment and it is too hard for them because they have to be quiet and they don't have anything to play with.  I have toys for the baby and I have a Wii that the 9 year old could play with but that is neither here nor there.  Then she thinks I should get out of the apartment more.  Well I work for one think.  I work 12:30 pm to 9:00 pm so it is hard to do too much during the day and I work too late to do anything in the evening.  Plus I work Tuesday thru Saturday so can't do things on Friday or Saturday evening when most people do.  I get out and go to a group and I go out and get lunch sometimes just to get out.  Only problem is I have not one to do things with.  My friend, my only friend, works Monday - Friday and gets off at 4:00 pm and when we do make plans she doesn't show up so I am alone.  What else can I do?  I am going to try some "Meetups" and see what happens.

I am just upset about my daughter-in-law right now.  There is no reason why they couldn't bring the boys over and bring something for them to do.

Comment by Jordan on April 14, 2012 at 5:46am

Oh, leslie b, what a rough experience. Look how strong you are. You faced up to it, and went back again. Cheers and extra {{{hugs}}} for you.

Comment by leslie b on April 13, 2012 at 4:31pm

Hi Linda. Everybody has these days. Don't get down on yourself for the way you feel. Rick will be gone 4 years in June and I still have those days. That's probably not what you want to hear but I just want you to know that you are not alone. Most of the time I am fine. That's not to say that I would rather have my old life back but that can't be. We all have to find our own way. We still have to meet someday soon. Take care and hang in there.

Comment by itaintme on April 13, 2012 at 3:35pm

Lindak, who knows why some anniversaries hit us harder than others. It's just a fact of live. Like Maggie gram said, don't beat yourself up over it. Tomorrow is another day. You'll feel better when you're out working in your back yard; I know I always do. Doug will be proud of you and you'll be proud of yourself once it's done. Remember the good times and smile. We all have pity parties from time to time -- it's nice to have this place to share them, where people understand rather than worry. Sending hugs your way.

Comment by Maggie gram on April 13, 2012 at 3:27pm

Thank yo so much to everyone who has responded to my posts.  It helps.

Comment by Maggie gram on April 13, 2012 at 3:26pm

Hey Lindak.  Don't beat yourself up over it.  You know there is no timeline for healing.  I am really new here but I do know that.  It is okay to feel sad and to cry.  I know I will not be over it that soon.  I am just three months this Sunday but I know I have the right to grieve as long as it takes.  Some can get over it that quickly but others can't and that is okay.  Let yourself grieve and feel the feelings.  Do what you need to do to take care of yourself.

Comment by leslie b on March 30, 2012 at 7:29pm

Welcome, Bonnie. so sorry you have to be here but glad you found this group. It will really help you as you take each step in your journey. It will be 4 years for me in June and I so appreciate the support I get here. I do hope we can help and that you find some peace and contentment. We are here for you.

Comment by itaintme on March 30, 2012 at 6:44pm

Bonnie R, as others have said, sorry to hear that you qualify to join our group, but happy to have you join us. I think you will find friendship, health and healing here. You will most definitely find understanding. We are all walking this most unwelcome of walks. I just passed the 3 year anniversary. As the song goes, some days are diamonds, some days are coal. Here's to diamonds -- for everyone.

Comment by hendrixx2 on March 30, 2012 at 3:45pm

Hi Bonnie R,

Truly understand and your pain, I lost my spouse of 40 yrs. on Nov 8, 2011.  You have come to a good place here, and will find people here who really understand what you are going through.  Wishing Peace and Healing for you...

Comment by Maggie gram on March 30, 2012 at 2:08pm

I am very recently widowed.  My husband passed away in January and it have never been through anything so painful in my life.  I am living day by day and trying to deal with the pain emotional and physical with as much grace as I can muster.  I am thankful for my faith and may family and friends and I am glad to find this website.

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