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Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

Born in the 40s or Earlier


Born in the 40s or Earlier

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Members: 226
Latest Activity: Apr 10

Discussion Forum

Joining seven weeks after my wife's death

Started by Neush. Last reply by Widow2015 Apr 7. 6 Replies

We seem to have been blessed.  We had a long (43 years) and happy marriage, jobs that we both enjoyed, two daughters and four grandchildren that live nearby, a home and neighborhood we enjoy.  We…Continue

Unfortunately finding myself here

Started by InsideLove. Last reply by Summergirl Feb 28. 6 Replies

My husband died on Aug 28, unexpectedly..I have a grief counselor- her husband passed away at 47 years of marriage too and so, she traveled this path. I do have a grief group, 4 widows 1 widower.…Continue

Joining the Club that no one wants to belong to...

Started by EarthSpirit (Carol). Last reply by EarthSpirit (Carol) Feb 27. 5 Replies

I am new to Soaring Spirits and this particular group. I find myself here as a result of my beloved husband Ralph’s passing on October 5, 2017. It seems like a lifetime ago, although only 4 months.…Continue

Comment Wall


You need to be a member of Born in the 40s or Earlier to add comments!

Comment by feelinglonely on May 10, 2017 at 8:25am

Hi Everyone

Had my total hip replacement surgery on April 25th.  Spent 1 1/2 days in the hospital, then to rehab for 8 days.  Coming home was a real adjustment due to the restrictions.  Saw the surgeon on Monday.  They gave me ultrasound of both legs, top and bottom to make sure no clots were forming, x-ray to make sure the implant was where it was supposed to be and it was.  The dermbond tape was removed and they said it looked good--so I am on the bend.  Started physical therapy, using walker and a cane.  Have lots of stairs so I have to be careful.  Just so happy to be home, but thinking about how different it would have been if my hubby was here--but, he is not so I have to do whatever I can to keep recuperating.

Barzan---glad you are doing well.  I hear knee replacement is a million times worse.  Thanks for your prayers.

Im a bit tired, but I will try to check in every few days,  Stay well my friends!

Comment by laurajay on May 10, 2017 at 5:39am

 FYI   Joan is on the mend   and I'm sure she will post here   when she can.  Thought  you'd all like to know.

Comment by Barzan on May 7, 2017 at 6:02am

lj, I had my knee replacement surgery on March 20th and due to pain meds, rigorous PT, elevating and icing the knee, I didn't get on the computer for about 2 weeks.  We are all different in our recovery time so I wouldn't start to worry yet.  I'm praying that Joan is just wrapped up with her recovery.  I don't think I got on WV for nearly a month but attended just to must answer emails.

Comment by Jim on May 7, 2017 at 4:41am

Hi Barbee.  Guess we'll never have a chance to meet.  We lived in Seattle a total of about 20 years until we moved on to Stretch Island which is about 40 miles south of Bremerton.   Am glad to hear about your meeting  "buddy" and being able to do things together..  Am happy for you.  Me?  I still have my bouts of loneliness.  I have my distractions - am taking banjo lessons and attending a watercoloring art class.  I get to workout two, three times a week... but they are no substitute for Mabel.  I've not developed friendships with woman  that I wish to pursue.  Am looking forward to seeing my Grief Therapist tomorrow; I keep an outline of topics I want to discuss with her.  I am still amazed at all the things that was done in preparing to move to Colorado.  I would never have accomplished all that had I not have wonderful friends who helped!  Their support was a blessing.  Am sorry I've not contributed much to WV since coming here  -- there isn't much to say.  Once in a while I'd attend a concert of the Boulder Symphony where my grandson plays.   I'd stay overnight at their home afterwards.  Once in a while I'd weep when thoughts of Mabel pop up unexpectedly, or in the silence of the night, I'd think of her and cry.  Yeah.  I still miss her.  

Comment by laurajay on May 7, 2017 at 1:38am

Has anyone  heard  from Joan re  her replacement surgery?   She emailed   me it was scheduled for the 25th  of April   but I was updating  my prayer list  etc and realized  I had not read any posts from her regarding her recovery.  Joan, if you read this please give us a brief  update .  We care  and wish you well.            lj

Comment by Alexandra on May 6, 2017 at 7:06pm

Hi Jan, I don't like it when people call me those names either. but since I've been in the south, I've gotten used to it. I even find myself saying "well, bless your heart" when something nice happens to me:) I got from your original post that you are still grieving quite a bit (no surprise there). but also that you are trying to make a life that your Don would be happy for you to have. It's just damn hard. But I do hope you will keep posting, if not for yourself, then for us. I read the posts every day and find comfort and strength with what people post, not necessarily the cheery ones, but what people are going thru ~ what their beefs are and what helps them and what doesn't. I think the comments about what you are called was just a distraction, the real message I got was that you miss your man! Yes, we are all different, but we are all the same in more ways than we are different. (in my opinion:)) So hugs to you and everyone here! ~ Alexandra 

Comment by barbee on May 6, 2017 at 6:32pm

Well said LJ! I'm in total agreement with you on this!

Comment by laurajay on May 6, 2017 at 5:40pm

Oh Jan!   My reply  to your  not liking   those  names  was not made to hurt you  or make you think  you are  wrong to think that way.  I just was so surprised to read it  when I am so happy  when people  take time  to speak to me or  help me and I like  fun  greetings.  Part of the reason we post  here is to express our feelings in truth.  And  we have all many extreme  differences of opinion  in many areas but that does not mean  some are right and some are wrong  just that we share  our ideas  and that is all  RIGHT   no wrong   ideas  and  no critical ideas just  different  ones!  And this is a safe place  to share because of it.  Topics  like  pets, travel, health,  "a new man/woman" in your life,  faith( religion) , re-location, etc. have  the   whole spectrum  of beliefs expressed   by the seniors on this board  and many  very different! No wrong beliefs  just expressing ourselves  so other  won't feel alone.  Some love and keep pets.  Some do not.  Some practice within  certain  religious canons.  Some do not.  Some eagerly desire  another  mate.  Some do not.   Some  crave  social activity  others  prefer  meditation/serenity.  Endless  differences all expressed  by  widows/widowers  moving  through  the grief of losing a beloved spouse and they are in pain.   Everyone  is right  and everyone has  the opportunity   to share right here.  If someone  says  others are   wrong  then they  violate  the purpose of this group.  I don't  think  that  has happened and I hope you reconsider  not  commenting in the future.        I for one  enjoy  hearing  other's  stories/progress/concerns  etc.         lj

Comment by Faolan on May 6, 2017 at 5:40am
They don't offend when they come from someone my own age group, or older, but when it comes from youngsters I find it disrespectful, and patronising, maybe I'm too old school.
Comment by Maggie on May 6, 2017 at 4:18am
Those names have never bothered me either, in fact I rather like it when someone calls me dear or me just seems sweet, not demeaning....oh well to each his own.

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