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Born in the 40s or Earlier


Born in the 40s or Earlier

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Members: 225
Latest Activity: Mar 10

Discussion Forum

Unfortunately finding myself here

Started by InsideLove. Last reply by Summergirl Feb 28. 6 Replies

My husband died on Aug 28, unexpectedly..I have a grief counselor- her husband passed away at 47 years of marriage too and so, she traveled this path. I do have a grief group, 4 widows 1 widower.…Continue

Joining the Club that no one wants to belong to...

Started by EarthSpirit (Carol). Last reply by EarthSpirit (Carol) Feb 27. 5 Replies

I am new to Soaring Spirits and this particular group. I find myself here as a result of my beloved husband Ralph’s passing on October 5, 2017. It seems like a lifetime ago, although only 4 months.…Continue

Comment Wall


You need to be a member of Born in the 40s or Earlier to add comments!

Comment by BelovedPeach on September 18, 2017 at 9:17pm
WOW Laurajay, I guess you told me! I was just excited to see the name of a city that was in my state besides NYC! The excitement got the better of me and I even apologized for it! I had no intentions in joining your group in discussion, but thanks for giving me permission to continue to read your group discussions that are available for anyone to see on the internet, whether you are a member of WV or not! You came across loud and clear in a rude, mean and insulting manner, bullying me back to high school days! It seems that this old soul at 45 has more manners and love in my heart than you do as an elder…shame on you, as everyone here has lost a precious person in there lives and are trying to find comfort, solace and peace wherever they can no matter there age or what group there in! Without your permission needed! I will leave you be with your group. May God bless you with some understanding and some love for others, no matter there age!
Comment by ceilya on September 18, 2017 at 12:24pm

Hi BelovedPeach, I know how you feel with the age of the groups.  I think it is probably because sometimes people in a certain generation can relate to different things like songs, travels, kids, grandkids, movies, etc etc etc.  But since your husband was more in "our" era I have a feeling you may relate as well.  My husband was also older than me and believe it or not I relate very well with the 80 - 85 group.  As for getting involved with discussions I personally don't think this is the place.  This site has been for me anyway to come and vent when no one understands and I know the people  on here will understand.  Also for where I feel connected when others tell me to move on with my life.  My life moves on with or without me present in the moment but here is where I can stop and be honest with my feelings that I, even after 7 years, may be having a difficult day.  

I don't have the opportunity to be on here too often because I work and have other commitments that keep me busy.  But like you I was worried I would come here and it wouldn't be any longer.  We should feel comfortable that this site will be here as long as any of us need it.  So advice from an "old" lady come here and feel safe to share your feelings but don't get involved in discussions.  Unless it is about where to go for vacation or how to make a good NY Italian meatball.

You are between Syracuse and Utica what town?? I hope you have the best day you can.  Ceilya

Comment by Okbobbo on September 18, 2017 at 12:08pm

Beloved Peach, Frank, and Ceilya,

My parents would take me to Rochester every other summer to visit an Aunt and Uncle. One of the last trips I took with my beloved Laura was to Rochester (Greece and Monroe), to visit cousins and with them to Buffalo (Salvatore’s Restaurant), Lewiston to visit the Basilica, and Niagara Falls. As a child we visited Watkins Glen and walked the steps - down! I have many fond memories of those trips.

Beloved Peach - write your post in another word editor and then copy and paste into the posting box. Its so much easier and you can write in a size that's readable.

Comment by BelovedPeach on September 18, 2017 at 11:37am
Frank and ceilya, I am between Syracuse and Utica and I can't tell you how comforting it is to know that there are others on this site that are nearby, as most are from the midwest and beyond, or NYC. I was born with an old soul (I'm 45), without children, and can relate to this group better than any other. My husband and soulmate, passed last November (he was 65) at Strong Memorial. I know because of my age that I don't belong in this group, but I can relate more reading this group, than I can any other group mentally. I have to say that over the last 7 months I have laughed and cried with all that are here in this group. At one point, when an argument arose, I became very nervous as I watched this group start to fall apart and people started to leave. I didn't chime in, but started to feel another loss, as I didn't know what I would do if I couldn't come to this group for some comfort in my own loss. So I thank you all for being here for me in the worst time of my life. I do have to agree that the current chat room is conductive to "younger" people with children and all that that entails. Being a retired "old soul" without children, I have a hard time relating to a lot happening in the chat room, as well. For your benefit, I would suggest that a separate chat room be created for this group or within this group, so that you can discuss things that more relate to your needs and wants. I also wish that they had a bigger comment box that showed more than 5 lines at a time, so that I can go back and reread what I am saying, which would be easier for me to keep me on track with my thoughts. But you can't have everything in Thanks again to this group for being here for me when I needed it the most and apologize to anyone that is offended that I chimed in. Thanks and God bless!
Comment by ceilya on September 17, 2017 at 7:56pm

Hi Frank, yes it is the never-ending saga of my roof but hopefully by tomorrow it will be done except for the inside repairs.  I can't take anymore disruption so I will ask that they come back another time to start fixing what was damaged inside.  I am trying to see something positive in all of this but not easy although I like the skylight.  There was very little light in my den and now I have light at least in the morning.    I am from a little town outside of Buffalo.  Lancaster.  I go back every year to visit family and friends.   I usually split my time between Buffalo and Utica where my dad's family is from.   When I was there last month I went on the Miss Buffalo cruise and my cousin took a picture of me at the USS THE SULLIVAN.  I remember as a kid watching the movie of the five Sullivan brothers of which the ship is named I believe.  Yes it is a small world.  Sorry about your wife 35 years is a long time.  Jim and I were married 40.  Sometimes the 7 years seems like 7 days and other times it seems a lifetime ago.  But I still miss him as I am sure you still miss Susan.  Thank you to everyone for being here for each other.  Have a good night....Ceilya

Comment by Frank on September 15, 2017 at 9:50pm

Hi Ceilya,

Saw your note on the construction.  You must have used the same crew that Susan and I had building the addition on our home!  Three years after Susan's passing, they finally finished the addition and drove off. When I got home that afternoon, I discovered that what they did not do (finish) would cost me a couple of thousand more for someone to correct the work.  I finally finished it myself and got the CO after two years of misery with them.

I saw you are from the Buffalo area. I am too.  I'm from Greece NY between Rochester and Buffalo. Went to Greece Olympia HS and later to MCC then into the navy for 20 years.  The first ship I was on is now moored at Navy Park in Buffalo, the USS THE SULLIVANS DD-537.  My brother lives in Holly and my sister in Hamlin.

Small world.

Congrats on your 7 years.  Susan suddenly passed in her sleep of a silent heart attack 2 months after our 35 anniversary in Dec 2012. 



Comment by Faolan on September 15, 2017 at 4:49am
Me too, and Alexandra, Ceilya, it was bad enough when the Croatian bachelors above me had a boiler leak, and my bedroom ceiling was damaged, but your roof damage makes it trivial by comparison. I expect your dog enjoyed going to work with you, tho'. Hurricanes and Terrorists, I can't decide which is worse.
Comment by elaine on September 14, 2017 at 1:09pm

So pleased you are okay Maggie - what a terrifying thing to have to go through.

Glad you weren't on your own.

Comment by ceilya on September 14, 2017 at 10:51am

It has been a while since I have been on here but always feeling a sense of comfort to know this site exists.  When they changed the name I panicked thinking where do I go now when I  need to know there are people who understand how I am feeling.  I did take my yearly trip to the Buffalo area again this year.  Wasn't sure since with all the new regulations on flying and just trying to stretch your legs is a major issue but I went.  Since Jim passed it isn't the same going home but I do it regardless since I still have a lot of relatives and high school friends there.  So much going on in my life.  I only seem to get on here when I need to just vent in a safe place.  I had a roof leak which turned into needing a new roof which turned into damage inside which turned into one roofers foot coming thru the ceiling which turned into a possible sky light which turned into can't find the right size in our area which turned into high winds and the tarp flew off and on and on and on.  This is one of the things that Jim would have handled and the stress of dealing with contractors and X amount of dollars has turned into XX amount of dollars.  I have had to bring the dog to work every day because of the banging and cannot go home until they leave each night.  But I can hear my mom saying "it could be worse you could be in Florida" and this I know.  So somewhere in me I am grateful.  Not sure yet for what but I am gonna be.  Sorry to complain because it does seem trivial with what is going on in the rest of our country but something directed me to the site which gave me the opportunity to vent.   There is so much more but need to get back to work but I will be back.   Thank you all for listening with your eyes.   I came here almost 7 years ago when Jim passed and did not know how I would make it 7 days let alone 7 years but when the worst of days hit I could come on here and find some familiar people but also new people who understood my pain of maybe just that day.  Again thank you.  Ceilya

Comment by Alexandra on September 14, 2017 at 8:03am

So glad you are okay, Maggie. I went thru three hurricanes when Dave and I lived on a boat and sailed the world. The eye went over us in Claudette Palacios, TX and it was very surreal. Luckily they were all Cat 1's or 2. But I do understand the fear/anxiety. About half way thru them we thought we were crazy for staying! Without Dave, I'm not sure how brave I would be. The cleanup here in Katy and Houston is moving along. As I drive down the residential streets it still shocks me to the core how much people have lost and the massive effort to clean it all up. Mother Earth like to shake us up once in a while:) Hugs to all, Alexandra


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