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Born in the 40s or Earlier


Born in the 40s or Earlier

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Discussion Forum

Unfortunately finding myself here

Started by InsideLove Oct 21. 0 Replies

My husband died on Aug 28, unexpectedly..I have a grief counselor- her husband passed away at 47 years of marriage too and so, she traveled this path. I do have a grief group, 4 widows 1 widower.…Continue

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Comment by Frank on November 2, 2017 at 9:16pm

Thank you all for your encouraging words and thanks Barb for the card.

I am improving and coming to grips with my loss of Scott.  I wish things had happened differently.

((((HUGS)))) and again, Thank You.



Comment by Faolan on November 2, 2017 at 3:26pm
This is awful to learn, parents should never have to outlive their children, and a double loss is even harder. Love and Blessings Frank.
Comment by barbee on November 2, 2017 at 3:16pm

Frank, so very, very sorry to receive the word of your multiple losses. A card with a private message is on its way to you. Words are so inadequate at a time like this. (((HUGS))) from both Vern and me

Comment by elaine on November 2, 2017 at 2:35pm

Frank, have just read Laurajay's post.  So sorry to read this news - my thoughts and prayers are with you.

Comment by laurajay on November 2, 2017 at 11:52am

Dearest  Frank   On the outside  chance you did not get my private  email  I wish to extend  my sympathy  on your latest  losses...your  friend and your oldest  son.  I read your post  in our year of loss 2012 postings  and it truly grieves  me.  You have my love  and prayers  that  your grief  will find a place of sanctuary sailor  man.  We  are here  for you  as always.  Feel our love across  the many miles.     Hugs   lj

Comment by Faolan on October 23, 2017 at 12:34pm
A retired greyhound is ideal for older folk, low maintenance couch potatoes. Light grooming, and because they are sprinters, just two stately short walks a day. Not all have raced, some just don't take to it. If I wasn't disabled, a retired greyhound would definitely be gracing my home.
Comment by Don on October 23, 2017 at 12:20pm

I love most kinds of dogs, especially English Springer Spaniels and Brittany Spaniels.  They re such loveable  beauties as well as great hunters.   We enjoyed  many a delicious pheasant and quail with the help of those fine animals and got lots of exercise walking them...   Over a 61 year period, we had 6 Springers and 1 Brittany.  All of the Springers were named Charlie Brown, the Brittany was Sam, short for Samuel.  I miss them more than I realized and would have more if I had a best lady friend to help with their care.    By myself alone  I just cannot do everything that is necessary to properly care for a loving pet..   We took them with us everywhere we could,except when we used air travel.   God, they were all so much fun and so loving.. 

Comment by Faolan on October 23, 2017 at 7:08am
We bred and exhibited etc German Shepherds and Samoyeds for over 30 yrs, companions first and foremost, no kennel dogs for us. Our last GSD died aged 16 yrs from a stroke, Babsi was a German Import, she waited until my husband came home, went to each family member in turn vocalising, then she calmly lay down, had her stroke and died, no fuss, no fear, as naturally as giving birth.
One of my Samoyed bitches became a PAT dog in her veteran years, visiting a nursing home. There was a new resident, an old lady whom hadn't spoken a word since finding her husband dead in bed beside her one morning I sat Suki in front of her and gently placed the ladys hand on Suki's head, introduced her, within seconds the old lady was repeating her name and stroking her, staff and doctors crowded round us in amazement, taking photographs of this "miracle", One thing animals have taught me is this, death is Not to be feared.
Comment by InsideLove on October 23, 2017 at 5:39am

Gosh. This thread seems like one long one, with different topics and that the most recent discussion was about pets. But I wanted to introduce myself, so I started a new discussion, "Unfortunately finding myself here" - a separate discussion.

So, did I do this incorrectly? Are the group's guidelines different than some others I am in?

Pets: my husband Marty and I had three dogs over our 47 years married life. Funny because HE and I grew up in a family who adored cats! But I developed allergies to cats over the years. Plus, he and I preferred the seemingly being able to feel more from them as a source of unconditional love. We traveled so much we often spent the first 24 to 48 hours expressing our guilt and concerns - was Chanel ok? Had the house sitter been there on time all day? Those kind of worries from guilt.

The first dog, a German Shepherd, we had to find a farm for when he was in the Air Force, and we were transferred to Turkey. But we LOVED Leda - smart as a human (picked up her empty bowl of water one day to lay at our feet to tell us she was way beyond thirsty and why the heck were we doing not giving her water?!)

Our second one took us into not so allergic breeds - a miniature mix mostly poodle. Ginger lived to be 16 years ago. She was dying of congestive heart failure just the week my husband needed his first open heart surgery at 47 years old. I had the painful work of making the decision, with him, to say goodbye to her.

Before we got our 3rd dog, my one request was that HE put her down with me should that happen again. It did. He did. And it was JUST as painful.

While I love dogs, and it's been just two months since Marty suddenly passed away after a routine hip surgery with complications. I've decided as much as WE (and I) love these furry friends we had, who gave us so many MORE memories, I just assume travel than welcome guilt in my life again.

Comment by only1sue on October 23, 2017 at 4:03am

Frank years ago we had two kittens too, unfortunately one of the cats died young so we had the other alone for some years.  Then we had a cat and a dog which we supposedly had just for six months but they stayed here until they died.  Two pets seem more contented than one on it's own.


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