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This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

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Born in the 40s or Earlier

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Born in the 40s or Earlier

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Members: 224
Latest Activity: yesterday

Discussion Forum

Joining the Club that no one wants to belong to...

Started by EarthSpirit (Carol). Last reply by EarthSpirit (Carol) Feb 8. 3 Replies

I am new to Soaring Spirits and this particular group. I find myself here as a result of my beloved husband Ralph’s passing on October 5, 2017. It seems like a lifetime ago, although only 4 months.…Continue

Unfortunately finding myself here

Started by InsideLove. Last reply by InsideLove Jan 12. 2 Replies

My husband died on Aug 28, unexpectedly..I have a grief counselor- her husband passed away at 47 years of marriage too and so, she traveled this path. I do have a grief group, 4 widows 1 widower.…Continue

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Comment by grandmafi on July 13, 2011 at 3:27pm

HI Fiona back for another wee chat ...... its way past midnight here and my coach has turned into a pumpkin but thought I would stop by and say hello again .......I was reading that a couple of you have "those " anniversaries looming ..... always difficult and I really havent learned yet either how to stop the melancholy feeling that preceeds them .... then they usually turn out to be not nearly so bad as we thought they would be..... even after 6 years of widowhood , no matter how hard I try to celebrate Billy`s life as opposed to dreading it ....I still cant shake off that heaviness.... I do bounce back much quicker than before  so thats a positive step in the right direction ...... I make a concious effort to count my blessings and not to let grief dictate what my mood is going to be....... grief permeates every single part of us ...its such a robber  of joy and we need to punch it on the nose and be stronger than it ... easier said than done huhh??????...... Anyway... going to toddle off to bed now...... there is a beautiful full moon tonight .....  took its picture ....  will post it soon ... understanding hug all around the room ...x

 

 

 

Comment by Jordan on July 13, 2011 at 10:30am
Runnergirl mentioned that she thinks it's time to dispose of those last t-shirts. In another group I am in, a woman is planning to make a quilt with her husband's t-shirts. I mentioned this to my son and his wife, and they loved the idea. We have several crafty people in the family, and one of them suggested we might also use some t-shirts to make covers for sofa pillows. Just a thought.
Comment by leslie b on July 13, 2011 at 6:09am
Hey Marcy. "One step at a time, one day at a time" is a very good mantra to have. Another one I always keep in mind when I'm feeling low is "This too shall pass". Firsts are always hard but you will get through this weekend just like you have made it through everything else so far. This journey is a long one with many twists and turns. Just hang on to your wonderful memories and be at peace with the knowledge that we here have all been there and are willing to help if we can. ((Hugs))
Comment by catmanor on July 13, 2011 at 5:36am

While I wish none of us had the "qualifications" to be part of WV, I'm glad to see our little group growing. We're kind of the tweens...somewhere between the young widowed with their busy families and the elderly widows of my mother's generation.

I'm facing one of those dates this weekend...our anniversary is the 17th. It will be the first since Dennis died on 1/1/11. I've tried to make some plans to help get through it but I have to say I'm terrified. His birthday was 2/24 and I absolutely fell apart...hoping to avoid that this time.

Hearing everyone tell their stories here has helped some...I know that I'm not alone and if I'm losing my mind so is everyone else. My mantra continues to be "One step at a time, one day at a time".

Thanks for listening...

Comment by owlbert on July 12, 2011 at 10:31pm

As Lee 'says' the internet is amazing, and has   become a very important part of our lives indeed... a means of meeting, and communicating with friends, from all over the World, who really understand what we are going through.     Sadly Madeline no longer walks by your side Lee, but, poor substitutes as 'we' are, 'we' are with you and share your grief on this road.    I write in the plural sense because 'we' citizens of Wid Ville share the common 'bond' of grief and know what you are going through.

Before Maggie died I set up small a website/blog to keep my mind occupied etc.    I thought the site would 'die' when Maggie died but my sons encouraged me to keep it going and I still write it up every day.    Now I get 'up' in the morning, looking forward to 'speaking' to my friends.    The internet, for me, has been a source of comfort, inspiration, and at times encouragement.    I am off out now to unclog the 'log' in our boat because the 'speedo' bit isn't working!     Have a good day everybody... they can be.... as "itaintme" said.

   I did have a good time yesterday communing with nature "itaintme" ... you sound like you understand that sort of thing.    I like that!     Off down to the harbour.    Might even get a photograph for the 'Hutte'.   "Catch you all later"

Comment by itaintme on July 12, 2011 at 7:05pm
I must agree about the wonders of the Internet connecting us from all around the world. What an amazing age we live in! "Mutilation of the soul," that is a very powerful phrase and oh so accurate. I continue to be amazed at how quickly a connection is made with someone else who has lost a spouse, but truly no one else truly understands. Thanks to all of you for helping to walk this walk.
Comment by leslie b on July 12, 2011 at 2:00pm
Hi again Fiona. I am in London, Ontario. That's just 2 hours away from Windsor. In fact I was in Windsor on Saturday to watch my grandson play two lacrosse games against the Windsor team. It is a small world isn't it? I've been widowed 3 years now. Mutilation of the soul! What an apt phrase. It describes how I feel perfectly. Hope to talk to you again soon. You sound like a very wise woman.
Comment by grandmafi on July 12, 2011 at 1:47pm
hello Leslie..... yes .. it is so helpful to have companions on this journey who can walk the walk ..... where in Cananda are you ??? my sister lives in Windsor Ontario and I have visited a few times. I have been widowed ( hate that word) 6 years now .... mutilation of the soul !!!!..... Trying to restore wholeness again and its one step forward a two  back ....... still have such moments of overwhelming loss as well as days when it looks as tho  all is well ... still one day at a time ...... can now count my blessings ... could`nt do that for a long time ..... still suffer from overwhelming lonliness at times even when surrounded by family and friends ...   have met some bautiful people on this journey that none of us wanted to take and still find that its only those who have experienced loos of their soul mate_ wind beneath their wing partners can truly understand ......  love and light and rainbow hugs all around the room ...x
Comment by leslie b on July 12, 2011 at 1:35pm
Hi Fiona, glad to meet you. Once again it is too bad we have to meet this way. Looking forward to talking to you in the future. I am in Canada.
Comment by grandmafi on July 12, 2011 at 1:28pm
hi there everyone .... Fiona from Scotland checking in ..... Albert ... delighted to see you on here... glad we met the other day and exchanged details ........ blessings ... Fi xxx
 

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