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Born in the 50s

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Members: 723
Latest Activity: 17 minutes ago

Discussion Forum

Dating

Started by Mike. Last reply by Barzan yesterday. 18 Replies

Anyone in San Diego ?

Started by ron323. Last reply by Melissa on Friday. 3 Replies

Anxiety

Started by ron323. Last reply by Melissa on Friday. 11 Replies

Giving Myself a Panic Attack

Started by Shoosie2. Last reply by Tekwriter Aug 9. 10 Replies

Problems with moving

Started by Racingfan60. Last reply by Tekwriter Aug 9. 3 Replies

Comment Wall

Comment

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Comment by riet 17 minutes ago

Today it is 4 months since my husband died.  I just don't know how to go on .  He asked me a few days before he died to think about 'that old fool' once in a while. He shouldn't have done that.  He is never out of my mind.  Not for one second. And I miss him so much.

Comment by chef (John) on Friday

You may wear your ring for as long as you want, Tekwriter. Now that I'm beginning Year VIII, I no longer wear mine, but I do have both Judith's and my wedding rings tied together with a white ribbon. I know a fellow widower who's in Year V and still wears his.

Barzan, like you, I gave Judith's clothing to various agencies. (I gave her work outfits [she was an attorney] to local agencies specifically requesting "professional attire" and hope that someone who picked up something of hers got the job she was seeking as a result.) 

Comment by Barzan on Friday

Chef, I still have a number of my husband’s things after 7 years.  I have lots of his tools.  I need to sell them.  His writings - keeping.  His soft brown corduroy shirt - snuggly so keeping.  He had a vast amount of great books - keeping most.  His clothes were donated to a teen shelter.

yes, we can keep wearing the rings.  I moved mine to my right hand but never take it off.

Comment by Melissa on Thursday

Tekwriter, I've gone around and around with that myself. I tried taking it off. I put it back on and wore my husband's ring next to it, on my middle finger. His ring is quite heavy and bulky compared to mine, and that was uncomfortable.

What I ended up doing is wearing my husband's ring on the ring finger of my right hand, with my ring on top of it. That keeps it from falling off. I wear my grandmother's wedding ring on the ring finger of my left hand, as a symbol of marriage and family. It works for me. Do whatever you feel comfortable with. There are no rules!

Comment by shelley on Thursday

I like wearing my rings.  I also wear my husband's watch.  

Comment by booktime (Susan) on Thursday

I did stop wearing mine about a month after. My finger felt incredibly naked. Then last year in going through my mother's jewelry, I came across a silver ring with an S shape on it. She had made it. I put it on my ring finger and it fit perfectly! I wear that one as a symbol that I was married and also in memory of my mother. It makes me very happy to wear this ring.

Everyone will do what is right for them. All of our paths are so different, so unique.

Comment by LP on Thursday

Tekwriter - no - there is no “have to” about anything! You do what you feel the need to do.

i will wear the ring Chris placed in my finger for the rest of my life.  I wear it in his honour and in the memory of twenty-three years of happy marriage. My jewellery choice is no one’s business. If people see it and think I’m still married, well, then, so what?  There is no harm done. I will always feel married to him, I will always feel that I am Chris’s wife. 

I can understand  if someone might want to remove a ring because they wish to start dating again, but personally I don’t, so the ring stays as a reminder of what was - perhaps the only- great success of my life.

Comment by CarLady on Thursday

Wearing your wedding rings is strictly a personal choice. The 5th anniversary is coming up September 1st for me and I still wear mine. Everyone should do what is right for them. There is no time limit, no right or wrong. I know ladies who wore their rings the rest of their lives. It’s your choice.  

Comment by Ma_Megabyte on Thursday

I would say not unless we want to.  Many people stop wearing their rings (or switch them to their right hand) when they start dating again.  Some people buy a black/dark ring to wear instead of their rings on their left ring finger.  I have tried taking my rings off, but my hand feels as though it is missing something, and the rings feel right there.  So, I have no plans for taking mine off.

Comment by Tekwriter on Thursday

Do we really have to stop wearing our rings?

 

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