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Are you dating? What's it like at "our" age?  Have you joined a dating site? Do you NOT want to date?

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Slick,

Whether it's a tongue or a penis inserted into my body, I think they're both purdy damn intimate! :-()

Actually, I do get what you're saying about kissing; its romantic, sensual & consuming ...

At 58, men my age also look crusty & unkempt just like the older ones. I've come across guys I grew up with who have commented on my still looking good. Uh! What to say? Oh, uh, nice truck. What's your dog's name? Squint ...

My mother's last boyfriend was 82yrs old when he died, up until his death he still maintained himself & always looked quite dapper. That man was always sharply dressed and used the best scented colognes. And to think, I finally found a new cologne DH actually liked the Christmas before he died. Jeezus, trying to get him to part with his Old Spice in previous years was a tug of war, you'd think I was trying to pull out his teeth! And wouldn't you know, both our sons wear Old Spice. "Sigh"

I will be honest here:  I have looked at "Plenty of Fish" a few times, not out of interest but just to see what would be out there if I were interested.  And there are only two kinds of men who post well-groomed photos:  Corporate types who would bore me to tears, and black men.  Almost all of the black men in my area appear to be well-dressed and well-groomed.  And mostly they seem like the nicest and most gentlemanly among a sea of biker guys,Grizzly Adamses, and just plain zhlubs.  I would have no issues dating someone of another race.  A bigger stumbling block for me would be religion.  I am not a Christian and will never be one so a devout man would not be suitable for me.

OH Melissa ...'Old Spice" Bill wore it too...I loved it ....but I did get him to wear Obsession for Men which I love...and I gave the last bit left to my grandson when Pop Pop passed...

Yep you got me...Kissing to me is very romantic, sensual and consumes most people to go further...to get "in the mood" JMO......

most of the men who come onto me are around 57-58...and look ten years older then me ...dirty, greasy hair...UGH! I do like short hair , or even long if it;s clean and in a ponytail....but not flying all over and dirty ,not combed for months...the grundge look......a nice clean well kept beard can be attractive ...and the cologne...YES!!! ...:) 

Your Mom's last boyfriend sound like what men should be like, care about their appearance ...they certainly have a laundry list of what women who contact then should look  like, be built like, wear in and out of bed, and what sports they should play.......I think men over 50 have come from a different world.....

Oh, man, ain't that the truth?  Why do men think that women will get a good first impression by them talking about lingerie and high heels?  Name me one woman who wants to go to sleep in corsets and garters and teddies.  You know what women want to sleep in?  Nice soft jammies.  You know what women want to do with high heels?  Kick them off. Especially when we get north of 50.  I'm sorry, but a 60-year-old in a corset and garters is pretty darn ludicrous. 

It is truly an education reading this stuff.  I give credit to guys who put effort into actually writing what they like, but if you're going to write "Heads turn when she walks into the room", then don't bitch about how you aren't meeting anyone, because most of us don't look like supermodels.  Or even like Susan Sarandon.

Look, I admit to being shallow.  I like a good-looking man as much as the next person.  And for 30 years I was lucky to have one who had no idea how handsome he was.  But I'm not JUST about shallow, and I'm smart enough to realize that drop-dead chiseled handsome is out of my league at this point.  Men in this age group don't seem to realize that.

It's good for me to do this exercise every now and then, it reminds me how content I am in a life filled with good friends and interesting activities.  And comfy jammies.  :-)

Bergen & Slick,

The problem with too many men is they think they're in a Built-A-Bear toy store ... 

Jerk offs dismiss the 100% fact women are human beings!

They also forget to mention what they will provide for all the perks they believe they're entitled to, deserving of. Can you imagine one of these guys drooling at a computer while composing his profile (?), as he allows his imagination to run wild -who knows what else he's doing. Yuk! At the same time, many want a cook, laundress, camper, hunter, house keeper and who knows what else in a corset, crotchless panties & stilettos.

I've been hit on by men of all ages including babies in their 20s, they're all nasty! I don't flirt, I'm under 5' w/long graying hair & a muffin top. The only attribute I have is muscular legs, both calves & thighs - horrible looking in a short dress w/heels -He-Man from the waist down. Let's face it, men & women alike, look at physical features first, however, men look at the carnal parts of a woman whereas women look at their eyes or hair or something completely different.

I find it amusing in a snarky way when I get the impression men think that because I'm short I can be picked up or rammed on top. If not that, then it's the legs -do they really think I can/will clamp onto to their body or penis to squeeze it tightly. In their dreams!!! Ignore these space cadets ...

The absolute truth is call girls, prostitutes, madames, swingers, sex kittens & the sexually indiscriminate do retire from their active life style. They also want companionship in their chapter 2. They may be the ones who contact the horn dogs as well as be willing to wear & do all the things on the list. Look at Mae West, she still thought of herself as a sex goddess into her 80s -the queen of show very little. Her last movie was Sextette at the age of 85. MW's mother was a former corset model, aunt was a corset maker.

"I don't like myself. I am crazy about myself." Mae West ...

I'd be leery of someone who wanted to "come watch a movie" ... But not in a theatre. My perception is that he'd be looking for something else... Maybe I'm wrong. One man asked me if I'd heard of the new theaters w seats that redline... For comfort.. I was not thrilled with that suggestion too...

I am new to this site and am finding my way around. I thought I would see how others felt on this topic and I see some similarities in how I feel. I would love an occasional companion to go to dinners, events, etc., but am not interested in anything beyond that. I am widowed a year and four months and the loneliness does work on me at times.

BergenJC, I really do not need a purse or a nurse, but it would be nice to have a friend that would be sweet to talk with on occasion. She would be really cool if she could fix me a sandwich ever now an then. I was listening to song that Olivia Newton John was singing last night. In the song she stated it's okay to put your troubles on my shoulder.

Now this is how I see it, I need her shoulder to cry on, and she would be welcome to cry on mine while dancing in the dark. She could leave purse at home.

David

David...I see it as you do..but we're all different....:)

I just read your post....sure comforts me about the being able to cry on her shoulder n she is able to cry on yours! Yes I'm bored n I'm reading a lot, n it is helping me cope with this process I'm going through. Thx
BergenJC --- the last two paragraphs of your post are my thoughts on the matter also. But I also agree with parts of David1980. My good friend (also a widow) started dating about 10 months after her husband died. She met a super nice man who had been widowed for years. They are enjoying going out to dinner and weekends together. I am happy to see her happy. But I also see the complications this brings to her life. She is independent and is trying to combine that with submitting (not a good word, but all I could think of) to the ideas and schedule of another person. But I guess this is no different from the start of any relationship, is it? I know that I am not ready to tackle a new person in my life. If it happens OK, if it doesn't that is OK too. A year ago, I wouldn't even have said that. All along something inside kept telling me that I had to start over by myself. I have learned lessons that I can't even put into words. So I continue on my path --- as do all of you. Keep sharing your lives, it helps.

I also see both ways ..that's why I threw in we are all different......I have tried dating sites in a moment of stupidity...maybe some are lucky to meet someone normal on them but I wasn't one of them .....any and all men who I think Bergen describes perfectly were posting me whether divorced or widowed....I learned a lot about men who have never been married and had children..we don't even live on the same planet..but mostly I think what makes me turn away is what Choosing LIfe said......I have in almost 5 years made some parts of a life that I love and wouldn't give up for anyone...so I guess friendship, companionship more so then a relationship is what I would like...sadly my only sister and 3 closest friends all passed in our early 50's so I am truly alone...I retired to take care of my husband...so I have no job .......a few not serious health problems keep them no serious by being able to rest when I need to...so that would all be taken away....the men I've met talk so much about family...how very, very important their family is to them...so is mine to me....do they think women need to be told this so they know they're giving up their family? maybe my family at their ages are happy as things are and don't want to be forced to spend a holiday with someone else's family....I'll stop because I have ran this whole idea in my own mind and that of others ....so many times...I still land on the same plate....we are all different , have different reasons for dating or not dating...no rights and no wrongs here..

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