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for some reason I have panic and anxiety at high levels that comes on sometime in the morning or afternoon. No matter what Ido, or what drug I might try to take. It has been two years, and I seem to have trouble living alone and knowing I am ok and safe. Does anyone else experience this?

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I'm at 15 months, and I go through something like this periodically, usually about certain topics or problems that are coming up.  I start feeling like I can't solve, it's overwhelming, it's going to end in disaster or harm or a worse problem.  It really upsets me, because I used to feel strong and competent.  Then I get upset thinking that maybe I only felt strong and competent because I was with my husband Randy.  We were together since I was 16.

Lately I've been using a metaphor for myself that I am an early stage recovering amputee.  I used to know how to stand, walk, run and even dance, but right now (especially the last couple of months when my numbness has started to wear off), I am so off balance.  There are times when I can't do anything, it seems. My new motto is that I'm taking a rest and not doing anything hard if I can help it.

I wish I knew what to tell you.  For me, exercise in general helps, especially with falling asleep, which is my most bothersome symptom.  My son kept suggesting learning meditation with Headspace, which I started daily 2 weeks ago, and it seems to be helping a bit.  I'm a little more conscious of how I'm visualizing my problems and of my self-talk.  Baby steps, I guess.  

I hope you get more suggestions.  Hugs to you.

Hi DrGayle,  nine years in and I get anxiety attacks off and on daily.  I have to say that it’s most likely due to the virus, sheltering at home alone and longing for the touch or hug from my family and friends.  For you, the more recent loss of your husband probably enhances the your attacks.  I have a cat who senses when I’m getting anxious and he jumps in my lap for a cuddle.  Like a miracle, it centers me.  Times like this, it’s a blessing to have a 4 legged companion.  

What I can suggest Is to do some deep breathing exercises and go for a walk.  Soothing music also helps.  If you watch tv, stick with sitcoms or non thought provoking programs.   Most important to spoil yourself with kindness and have someone to talk to who’s a good listener- like the people here.

Hugs to you,


Yes, every day.  I feel for you.  Unless one has experienced severe anxiety, they can't understand it.  I hope you get some good responses on how others control it.  Mine happens to be medication, after trying different techniques and therapies.  I think all of us who have anxiety have had it worse in the last few months with all that has been going on with the pandemic, etc.  I as well as many others are here for you.  Sometimes just knowing you're not alone with these feelings helps.

Warm hugs,


At 5 months, my anxiety is still pretty much constant.  I think it may be diminishing a bit, as it isn't getting to a panic level as often.  As others have suggested, I've found daily walks help.  I reached out to an old friend of my late wife some months back to walk with me occasionally, and having her to walk and talk with has helped reduce the sense of isolation.  Talking to her also helps stop me from imagining I'm losing my mind entirely.  Not sleeping well makes it worse, and I've found melatonin somewhat helpful for that.  I've found booze and other drugs just make me wake up with the same problems I had before, but with a hangover added to the mix.

I'm also kitty-sitting my daughter's cat.  Having another creature to take care of seems to help, both in terms of having physical contact, and in keeping me from getting too lost in my own head.  A while back I forgot about some bacon cooking in the oven.  I didn't notice when it started burning until the cat jumped on my lap and meowed as if to say "Hey. You with the opposable thumbs.  I hope you aren't waiting for me to take the bacon out of the oven"!

I'm still doing lots of stupid, forgetful things like that.  Not sure I'm ever going to be very good at this living alone thing.

I have nothing to say to help you, except that I also get panic attacks when I wake up in the middle of the night and realize I'm alone. Realizing it's a panic attack helps me talk myself out of it, but it is still scary. Just know you're not alone with these feelings/experiences.

I just lost my husband in July, 2020. I too get panic attacks, when the word Hospital is mentioned, or if I am driving in the direction of the Hospital. My husband was in the hospital ICU for one month. I was allowed to visit with him for only half hour during the day.

I am having a very difficult time. We were married for 48 years.Not sure if I will ever be okay.


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