This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

As the weather warms and thoughts of summer begin to beckon me somewhere...with an "anywhere but here" kind of mentality, I start my annual battle of the mind about traveling alone. It's not insecurity, mind you. I have traveled a lot on business, but that's always a planned destination with purpose. Not much time to wander beyond the absolutes. A couple of my usual travel companions are tied into family jaunts in the next few months so I thought this might be the season I break out, and hopefully break free of "couple mania"... constant reminders of how great it was to travel with THE one I miss! What's worked for some of you? Have you traveled alone to somewhere exciting by yourself? Any suggestions, ideas?

Views: 2141

Replies to This Discussion

Last April I went on a 2 week road trip - alone...... I drove from Michigan to Texas where I visited a girlfriend and then across then took back roads to Colorado Springs to visit another girl friend - then took back roads home. I cried most of the drive to Texas - sometimes so hard I had to pull over - I realized that making new memories so far away from the safety of my home brought up a deep sadness and tears that I really can't explain. I was happy to find comfort with my dear friend - we spent our time together watching old movies and talking - just what I needed. When I left for the second part of my trip I stopped all along the way - took remote roads - got out of my jeep whenever I saw something that caught my interest. When I got to Colorado I went hiking, rock climbing and rode some trails on horseback - all new for me. There were still a few tears but mostly I felt renewed and strong. I returned home a different person - family and friends noticed. When my husband was dying he told me he wanted me to live a full life after he was gone - but for a long time I was just going through the motions - the trip which of the two weeks I was alone 8 of the day's was the beginning of starting to live a full life.....

Here's my 2 cents worth:  I unexpectedly answered an offer on Linked In and ended up traveling to South Africa for a month, working in a school to help students in a poor region improve their skills so they would be viable in a university setting.  The timing was maybe a little early in my grief journey, yet it was a huge growth time for me.  Learning another culture opens one's eyes also, and gives new appreciations.  I should also mention that i met a dear friend from WV in South Africa - so we actually met and will travel together when the opportunity arises.  

Last year, I signed up for a "roommate" on a single travel to India.  The make up of the group was interesting, but singles look out for each other in a way others do not.  (Our young guide from India observed this - that couples tend to stay in couples, whereas singles know everyone, know who's missing, intermingle more at dining tables, etc.)

I just completed a trip to Australia/New Zealand with a widow friend who has always wanted to go there also.  The travel company is not one I would choose again, as the numbers of participants was too huge.  But as a "two", we could mix and mingle with both singles and couples quite well.  The nature of the group in Australia was very open and the ages were very diverse.  15 of us went on to NZ and inherited additional people there - up to 48 people.  The nature of that group was very different, not quite as fluid.

I enjoy travel - and will continue in whatever way works!  I've not been quite brave enough to travel completely alone, as Travel Solo does.  Since I live in a rather isolated area, I think I appreciate group energy and interactions best.  I also appreciate not having to think after the trip is underway, as all lodging, experiences, etc. have been preselected.  I get to relax and enjoy the people and places.

I'll look forward to your updates!  


Pat, you sound like a kindred spirit!

DH died in November and in his last months I booked a small-ship, nature-focused cruise in Panama and Costa Rica.  I just got back on-line; the cruise ended this AM and I'm in San Jose, Costa Rica for a couple of days.  I had a fantastic time.  DH and I had taken this line (UnCruise) in Alaska twice and it tends to attract active, down-to-earth, curious, nature-loving people.  No fixed seating so I had a chance to have meals with just about everyone (only about 60 passengers).  More couples but they were nice people and frequently didn't do activities together so I might be having a conversation with just one or the other at any given time.

Iceland in August will be a little different since I'll be on my own but I'm still looking forward to it.

I'm also glad you posted this, Carolinaheart. I wish I had someone to travel with. I'm at 4yrs. No one I know is interested in traveling. I did travel to Ecuador for a month. The traveling was by myself, but I stopped in Houston and visited a niece and my daughter and family live in Ecuador. So, technically I didn't go on a trip by myself. Everything seems everything is per person double occupancy, with is expensive when you have to double.  Everyone I know in this town isn't interested in traveling. Those family members and friends that travel with a spouse don't seem to want a third wheel. I've even said  "hey, let me know if you're going somewhere, I can meet you"  I'm very interested seeing suggestions. 

Looks like we have the makings of a travel group! 

I'm serious. We could pick a place and date. Somewhere in the middle for a first one.  I'm in Oregon. Maybe only a couple of nights, in case we can't stand it. :D  Just a thought. 

count me in

I have been having feelings like that too. 

I met one widow online here who purposefully took several short cruises even in the first year after her husband;s death. She just wanted to know she could do it. 

I have been thinking of buying some simply camping gear to camp in my car - maybe go up into the high country for a coupe of nights - for teh same reason - to know that I can do it. 

On the other hand   - there are some travel groups for single women. It could be a fun.

These links might help to give you some ideas:

Let me know what inspires you


Great ideas, Maria Louisa!!  Thank you for posting!!

I have been wanting to get out and do things since my husband passed almost 11 months ago. But even when I just go to Walmart or something simple like that once I get there though I can hardly wait to get back home. I have though made a 2 night reservation in August to go to Laughlin Nevada. My husband and I really enjoyed going there so that's why I chose to go there. I hope I haven't bit off more than I can chew.

Hi Maria

My husband, Mal, died on 5th February 2018, only six weeks ago and I have been on two cruises. The first with my girlfriend, Carmel, because everywhere I looked at home I got another knife in the heart. The second was with my grandson, Geordie. I came back two days ago. Everywhere, there were couples, people holding hands, and I broke down several times. However, people were very kind. I know I can do it, I can travel anywhere, it is just seeing couples that breaks me up. I feel so alone. My grandson is only 10 and his focus was on having fun with his new friends (fellow cruising children) so I was still left on my own most of the time I would not take a child again. However I love your links. Thank you for  them. 

Hello Carolinaheart, I am new to this sight, and I read your thread last night and it was like God answered. I lost my husband 11-2014. We were full time RV for 7 years. We found out he had cancer 6-1 and he died 11-18. I moved back in our house and sold the rv. Now trying to deside sell the house and hit the road? I miss the rv life. How did you like Rv women?


© 2019   Created by Soaring Spirits.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service