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Born in the 50s

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Comment by Roxi on June 16, 2019 at 1:25am

Ciao Ron i think that in the middle of the storm you can find some oasis to find comfort and appreciate life again...enjoying your trip to london and the company of your son...ciao roxi

Comment by SweetMelissa2007 on June 15, 2019 at 5:39pm

[[[Hugs Ron]]]

The mental exhaustion I experienced was from depression ...

I wasn't able to keep up w/much of anything in going from one to another to finally laying on the couch. Habits changed to a later time such as getting my morning beverage, eating, etc ...

There are activities that are either too difficult to engage in from a sentiment stand point or hampered by the the lack of energy due grief - it is normal ...

As for loneliness, it became less & less of a problem as the years go by. I learned to be unmarried as well as comfortably alone. I think of Bob everyday w/lots of smiling & laughing. When my grief ended, all was resolved in now living my life happily & peacefully unemcumbered from that emotional Rollercoaster called grief ...

Take care of your needs first ...

Wishing you peace ...

Comment by Melissa on June 15, 2019 at 3:58pm

Ron, there are days when I don't get out of bed. I don't sleep, either. I just lie there and wait for time to pass. It's a horrible feeling.

The first year or so, I was frantic with grief. Now, I'm just exhausted. In my book, exhausted is better than frantic. 

Just take things one step at a time. As my husband used to say, "They have stores in London. There's nothing you can't get if you need it."

All you really need to be sure of is passport, tickets, and any medication you need in a carryon. You'll be good to go. 

Comment by Barzan on June 15, 2019 at 12:10pm

Ron, so sorry you are struggling so much.  Hopefully being with your son and a different country will provide some insulation from your pain.  I’m sending you good vibes.

Riet, after 8 years alone, I still feel a small amount of resentment when seeing older couples and couples holding hands.  I can see why celebrating anniversaries that aren’t ours can affect us so profoundly.  I’m sending you a big hug.

Ultra, some days the magnitude of my loneliness for B is just too exhausting.  There are days I have to will myself out of bed.  If I didn’t have my 4 legged bundle of fur, I may hide in bed myself.  Sending you some virtual hugs.

Thank you all for having been there for me a few days ago.  It’s comforting to know I have you here to share with.


Comment by riet on June 15, 2019 at 10:12am

Ron,  Feeling alone is all-dominating. It eats away all the beautiful things. I hope you can find some peace and quiet with your son. But how can life be full again, as it was? Impossible! I need my husband for that. What a happy life we had together.
This is a difficult Saturday for me. Exactly 50 years ago, we went to a family celebration together for the first time after we met. His cousin married. The happy couple are now celebrating their golden jubilee in good health. I am very happy for them, but I would have loved it so much for us together. I apologized for the party. I can not do it. Everyone of the friends and family is still together with his spouse. Only we were not allowed to stay together.
I really try to think of all the beauty that we had and how happy we were. But on some days it's so hard.

All the best to everyone of us.  Have a nice weekend

Comment by Ultra2015 on June 15, 2019 at 9:44am

Hope everyone is doing ok today.

Its been a dark hole for the past few weeks.  Remembering June 9th 2015 was the day we found out Sandi's breast cancer had metastasized to her brain. June 9th wasn't a trigger I had anticipated.  I see a lot of posts about exhaustion.  I get up try to eat and have coffee and then go back to bed.  Barely staying ahead of the days chores.  And packing for my London trip is at a stand still.  Have to get back to that.  16 months and the loneliness is overwhelming.  I am looking forward to seeing my son and his wife.  Just have to get to the airport and make it happen.  

Thanks for listening


Comment by LP on June 14, 2019 at 1:48am

Hi suzan,

I didn't see this feed until today. I hope you were able to find some peace yesterday. It sounds like you made the best of it. 



Comment by KJPE on June 13, 2019 at 6:57pm

amen to that.

Comment by Barzan on June 13, 2019 at 12:35pm

I wish to thank all of you for sending me good vibes and support.  To pass the day so far, I sat at my sewing machine and made chemo hats for breast cancer patients at the hospital where I retired from.  It was the best way I could think of to spend this day.

Hugs to all,


Comment by Melissa on June 13, 2019 at 11:59am

Wishing you comfort and peace today and every day, Suzan. All my love~


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