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Born in the 50s

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Latest Activity: 16 hours ago

Discussion Forum

Misery loves company

Started by Tess. Last reply by Mari 16 hours ago. 14 Replies

Sunday Blues

Started by LP. Last reply by Estragon Apr 19. 10 Replies

How old was he?

Started by sadderbytheday. Last reply by DIVA70 Jan 26. 6 Replies


Started by Lark. Last reply by Maggiepie Jan 24. 14 Replies

Keeping a journal sometimes helps

Started by sadderbytheday. Last reply by sadderbytheday Dec 31. 9 Replies

Comment Wall


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Comment by CarLady on March 26, 2020 at 3:59pm

BEAV, thanks so much for your kind words. You made my week  :-)

I pray we all stay healthy and safe, and that our countries remain allies. 

President JFK said these words:“Geography has made us neighbours. History has made us friends. Economics has made us partners. And necessity has made us allies. Those whom nature hath so joined together, let no man put asunder. What unites us is far greater than what divides us.”

The Kennedy brothers and Martin Luther King gave the best speeches in my opinion, and delivered them with passion. Their words are timeless.  

Comment by BEAV on March 26, 2020 at 3:45pm

CarLady, thanks for your post. Here in the San Francisco Bay Area our existence mirrors yours. I've handled the isolation pretty well up until today. Yesterday was my Sister's 65th birthday and I so very much wanted to be with her and her family to celebrate. They live 1 hour away, but it's just too risky to be around them for each other's protection.  Yesterday I also heard from a friend who I've not seen/heard from in 20 years. And he happened to be the one responsible for my meeting the love of my life and husband of 25 beautiful years. While we had an enjoyable time connecting again, I had to drop the bomb of Gary's passing 7 months ago. So yesterday was a bittersweet day by all accounts. So today I've been pretty blue considering everything on top of this very isolating existence. But your positive words have definitely uplifted me and for that I'm thankful for you AND this wonderful community where the sole purpose is to support on another. 

Comment by Barzan on March 26, 2020 at 1:58pm

Hello everyone,  here’s an new 20 questions if you’d like to play.   Copy and paste.  Can’t wait to see your responses.

1. what was your 1st pet and his/her name?

2.  Did you have a favorite stuffed animal as a kid?

3.  What was your favorite subject in high school?

4.  Did you earn an award or get a trophy for an accomplishment in school?  Which and for what?

5.  Were you ever in a school play?  Name and your role:

6.  What was the 1st concert you went to?

7.  What is your favorite sport?

8.  What is your favorite thing to cook?

9.  What item(s) did you save from your childhood?

10. when you look out your front window, what do you see?

11.  What is your favorite season and why?

12.  Do you have a talent that isn’t marketable but fun?

13.  One piece of clothing you just can’t part with.

14.  Which is your favorite room in your house?

15.  What is the last book you read?

16.  What show do you binge watch?

17.  Your favorite flower is?

18.  What is the one food you have to out for that you wouldn’t cook?

19.  Are you a morning or late night person?

20.  Do you like doing the 20 questions?

Okay, let’s see what responses we get.  Have fun.


Comment by CarLady on March 26, 2020 at 12:10pm

In Toronto we’re asked to stay home except for groceries, pharmacy, medical and necessities only. Those who’ve returned from out of country are under mandatory quarantine for 14 days. Most stores are closed, except those that are approved to be open for necessities.  We are seeing more cases of this coronavirus every day.  
I have video happy hour with a few of my widowed friends but I’m not seeing my son, daughter and new baby grandson and I’m really sad about that. I started painting a room as a project to keep busy. When I start to feel really down, I look at Bill’s photo and remind myself that he would give anything to be here right now even under these drastic circumstances.  He wanted to live so badly but it wasn’t to be.  This crisis will pass and in a few months and our lives will resume. I have faith that we will all survive this, as we are surviving after losing our spouses, stronger and wiser than before. Hugs and hope to everyone. 

Comment by Mary on March 26, 2020 at 11:45am
I'm so very sorry, Riet. I think most of us have been exactly where you are now. It's hard not to think of "what should have been" or "what should be". I find that I'm constantly fighting bitterness.

I'm grateful that we have this place to share our thoughts without feeling bad or that someone is going to judge us - or even worse, suggest that we "volunteer or get a hobby" to "get thru" these feelings.

Thinking of you...
Comment by Melissa on March 26, 2020 at 10:58am

Oh riet! I'm so sorry!

I'm crying more now than I have since my husband died. All I see and hear about is how people are getting through this crisis together, and how blessed they are to have each other.

Then I feel guilty for not being happy for them. But I'm not happy for them. I have never felt so alone in my life and I just don't want to hear about how happy you are with your partner.

Your friends' happiness SHOULD be yours! You deserve it! We all deserve love and comfort and peace. ALL OF US!

I really feel you. I don't want to speak for the rest of us here, but I think most feel the same from what I've been reading.

This is the only place we can be honest and honestly, I am filled with ugly emotions along with the ever-present heartbreak. That's really not like me. It didn't use to be, anyway. But it is now.

You are in my thoughts and in my heart. How is your weather? Is it warm and sunny yet? I keep thinking we'll feel less sad when we get some sunshine.

When things in the world are back to normal, I would love to visit your country and meet you. I have a friend in the Netherlands and I'd like to meet her too. We all have each other, and I'm so grateful for that.

Keep talking to us, riet!

much love~

Comment by Barzan on March 26, 2020 at 10:49am

Dearest Riet,  I’m feeling the same way.  We are on mandatory stay home orders in Colorado and I was thinking earlier today how most of my family and friends all have someone beside them except me.  Then I thought about all of us in this group who are in the same boat.  Having a pet is helpful but my cat would much rather sleep than carry on a conversation.  So there’s that.  
My husband, if he were here now, would put himself on the front lines helping everyone.  I miss him terribly.  I miss not having lunch or dinner with my friends.  I can’t even visit my mom in her care facility and her health is failing.  
I've lived through a revolution so I’m determined to live through this one.

all I can send you is a virtual hug and you remain in my thoughts.

I will post another 20 questions later today or tomorrow.  I think it helps a little.


Comment by riet on March 26, 2020 at 10:30am

I crashed today. Dear friends thought to cheer me up with a cheerful whats app from both of them. They drank a glass of wine together. They reported that they were still in good health and hoped the same for me.
They looked so happy at the age of 75 that I could only gasp and think: that  should be us: my husband and me.
 After this, I've been crying enough  for a whole year now. I really wish everyone their luck, but suddenly, again,  I saw what I had to miss .
I just had to tell someone.  Hugs

Comment by Tess on March 25, 2020 at 11:45am

Lioness, there are those who do depend on cannabis. And as far as the liquor stores, as far as I am concerned, a little imbibing may just help people get through this chaos. 

Comment by Barzan on March 24, 2020 at 2:49pm

Hi Lioness,

Glad you are doing well and are safe in BC.  It would be so nice if we didn't have the chaos we are experiencing here in the US.  It seems that our lives don't matter as much as the stock market.  Heartbreaking.


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