Born in the 50s

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Comment by BillsWife35 Terri 11 hours ago

Gordy's Widow:  I did the same.  I did it many more times.  Then one day, I was home alone ... and I yelled at his picture and cried really hard; why are you never coming back!; YOU ARE never coming back; YOU ARE NEVER EVER COMING BACK, kind of over and over.  I was really sad and angry at the same time.  It really really (REALLY) hurt.  You all know that deep down heart stopping wrenching feeling.  But I think it did help over time.  Now I can calmly say to his picture or in my heart I know you can't come back, and you are NOT supposed to.  But, I want to be with you; when my time comes.  I will be with you when the time is right. I miss you and I always will."  I am trying to use that montra to keep me going.  It's just one one more thing we have to do to keep going forward.

Comment by Joellen 12 hours ago

I hear you.. my dream was for us to go together so neither one of us had to live without the other.of course that did not happen... I am misserable..

 

Comment by Gordy's widow 12 hours ago

I also ( and this was much harder)wrote  a "good bye I'll see you later my love" till we meet again sort of letter to my honey, and I took that and buried on the beach at a boat club we used to be members of.... however that didn't help too much. It was symbolic but it didn't help me to let him go..... I don't , didn't, can't let him go......   wish I had been the one to pass......

Comment by Drifting 13 hours ago

Dianne - boss is a Bitch - Pluto is good

Comment by MyNewLife (Melody) 13 hours ago

Diane, I'm so sorry that happened to you. I have come to hate that line, "nothing personal, it's just business." How awful for you. I love that you sent her to Pluto! :)

Comment by Dianne in Nevada 14 hours ago

And Melody ... this worked to get me over the anger at my former boss, who called on my birthday to tell me it was just too hard for her to not have me available 24/7 so she was moving me into another position and bringing back the person I had replaced 9 years ago. No birthday wishes ... just this news at a very emotional time. This was just 2 weeks after his cancer diagnosis and while my husband was still in ICU after a second emergency surgery. In another Brave Girl exercise, we're taught to only let the right people into our 'soul house' and to keep others at a distance - behind the fence. For those who need to be further away, we can send them off to the moon. I tried that at first, but the moon was still to close. She's up on Pluto now. 

Comment by MyNewLife (Melody) 14 hours ago

Lol Gordy's W, I have a BBQ grill that will work just fine.

Comment by Dianne in Nevada 14 hours ago

LOL Gordy's widow ... but you are absolutely right! I attended Brave Girl Camp and one of the exercises there involves writing our deepest hurts and anger in a journal ... being really honest and saying things we would never be able to say out loud or to the person.  Later we each tossed our journal into a bonfire, standing together as that ugliness disappeared. It really did help me get rid of some 'stuff'.

Comment by Gordy's widow 14 hours ago

Is your blog here Mel? I would print and burn. There is something cathartic about the flame, really, I am not just a fire bug! LOL

Comment by MyNewLife (Melody) 19 hours ago

I took your suggestions and posted about her on my blog. I actually posted about her at the time it was happening back then, so even better. Now to decide if I turn it into a letter (to burn) or just let the exposure of putting it out here be good enough.

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