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Born in the 50s

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Comment by booktime (Susan) on Wednesday

Tess, I agree. Things do get magnified! I can't think of anything specifically but I've been there for sure!

Gary'sWife, as a librarian, I was happy to hear your story! I always try to remember that everyone who enters the library comes with a story. Hopefully a joyful one but sometimes so very sad. And all we can do on the other side of the desk is try to make a bright moment in a dark day.

Comment by Gary'swife on Wednesday

Oh Tess....I hear ya/.   When we are under stress it's just so difficult to deal with these unexpected and irritating things.  I remember after my mother died I was at the library, and the librarian said I had book fines, and I kind of lost it....unjustifiably.  Luckily, librarians are some of the most patient, polite, people on earth.   Later I was shocked at how I had acted.  

Sending hugs and come here to vent anytime.

Comment by Tess on Wednesday

Hi all. I just needed to vent, to share, to feel bad with others that may have similar emotional responses. Today I got a parking ticket. Initially I was super infuriated, still am. It is because of the street cleaners coming through and I didn't have time to move my car. I am juggling a million things, selling my house and getting ready to move. I was so mad I called the police station. No, I didn't use profanity, though I clearly wanted to. I always have had a quick response when I feel that situations are unjustified. Now, I guess because I am alone and feel the need to defend myself, I get really pissed off. Things like this feel so magnified. Am I alone in this?

Anyway, I think I'll pay the fine in coins, mostly pennies, LOL.

Comment by riet on May 14, 2019 at 7:14am

Dear friends

Roxi and Allan,

I sympathize with you. These memorial days are that hard. Of course our loved ones are never out of our minds, but on some days you feel the loss much worse. 

 Melissa, it is sometimes very hard to find any energy if you are having a hard time. Sometimes you really long for the time when everything was so easy because it was " the two of you ". Now it's not just sitting alone en lonely in front of the TV, but making all the decisions yourself, processing all the dents of life itself. These tasks are sometimes so unclear . So heavy to do it on your own. Take  good care of yourself.

Shelley, Thank you for the insight you often give me in this search. I also really appreciate your messages.

Hugs for all of you, thank you for being there.

Comment by Ultra2015 on May 14, 2019 at 6:14am

I'm with you Allan.  15 months and I still miss my girl everyday.  Day by Day is all we can do I guess.  

Take care

Ron

Comment by Allan_sch on May 14, 2019 at 2:00am

Today is one year since my sweetheart went home to be with the Lord 

i miss her everyday. It’s been a tough year, but I take it just Day by day 

Comment by Melissa on May 13, 2019 at 1:49pm

Riet, I've had the same thought many times. "Okay. You've been dead long enough. You can come back now."

Completely irrational, but there it is.

I noticed yesterday that I'm just feeling worn out and over this thing called life. Not horrible grief, not depression, just exhausted to the bone. I am using all my energy trying to find a reason to live, and then living.

I'm just so tired of it.

Thanks for being here. Peace to you all.

Comment by Roxi on May 13, 2019 at 10:42am

Tomorrow is 14 months....and i'm missing him intensely... " you're missing only one and the world is a desert" ...how true ! 

Comment by irishlady (jan) on May 13, 2019 at 10:01am

Maggie...I too am at 6 years. I feel like you. I am fairly content but not joy. The loneliness does creep in. I can be out having a good time and then I come home and shut that door and the loneliness of not having someone there to greet you and ask how your day went can be overwhelming at times. I also agree that some day can be interminably long and yet. years seem to go too fast at times. And I also am not looking for anyone. Hard to top the best, which my husband was. I was blessed to have such a wonderful marriage.

Comment by shelley on May 13, 2019 at 9:54am

riet, I so appreciate your post.  Yes, I think the regrets will continue for a long time.  I'm more able to control my thoughts, but the regrets are still there.  And yes, the changes that I wish we could share.  Both big and little changes-  I finally bought a new microwave oven.  It was on our 'to do' list.  He'd like the new one.  And comfort, i miss that so much.  Didn't realize how much a part of our relationship it was.  It was so automatic, so basic, so effortless.  And yes, the missing.  I still have moments when I tell him I can't do this without him.  Daily I ask him to be with me in whatever way he can.  It's been 18 months for me and I don't know if I miss him more.  But I definitely miss him more deeply.  Thank you, riet.    

 

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