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Born in the 50s

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Comment by shirley on December 28, 2011 at 11:03am

like your spirit Letha and you are doing amazing for your time frame.

If you have a tendency towards depression as i do, that mindset is nice to hear, but out of reach - at least for now.

I applaud you.

Comment by Letha on December 28, 2011 at 9:38am

So sorry for everyone having a tough time. I'm now at not quite ten will be ten wks. Friday. I can honestly say I have good days when I keep busy and can even laugh and smile with people. Then I turn around and have a crappy day. I try really hard not to have too many bad days because I know Michael would absolutely HATE me sitting around crying and feeling sorry for myself. He was the "Snap out of it already!" type. I pretty much made up my mind that no amount of crying or moping around is going to change anything..he's still going to be gone..and I really don't want to live my life like those 'bad days' all the time. I'm confidant that we'll ALL have better days ahead. We've already been through the worst.

Comment by SallyStarre on December 28, 2011 at 9:16am

Thank you famingt for your post.  Going thru a really tough time now and trying to pull myself up.  Mem I'm glad you are having a better day. I guess we need to get thru the bad days and savor the not so bad days.  Wishing us all better days ahead

Comment by flamingt on December 28, 2011 at 9:06am

To all of us on our journeys....picture the path that you are on in your mind.  See the crest of the hill above and you are hiking that rocky trail to the top.  Gravity pulls you back, but you persist, and when you get to the top, you can see a much better view!  Then you have to follow the path down the other side of the hill, it's easier, there are fewer rocks, your body just wants to run down that path!  It's exhilarating.  Each of us has this body that goes up and down these paths...but our MINDS are always sensing the next step. may sound crazy, but when I get melancholy and start feeling loneliness and grief, I sit down, take a deep breath and close my eyes.  Then I picture myself on the top of the hill looking all around at the view, and it's beautiful.  My love is right there with me inside my heart.

I hope this all helps you.  It has helped me (even while I typed it!)

Comment by Joyce on December 28, 2011 at 3:51am

@FlamingT:  I'm early in this journey, I'm at 11 weeks but I loved that you shared what Maria said.  It is beautiful and really made be feel a little better.  Thanks.

Comment by Joyce on December 28, 2011 at 3:48am

@Boburly, I understand what you're saying and everyone's journey is so different.  We have each other and we'll take one baby step at a time.  The holidays are very rough to get through.

Comment by Joyce on December 28, 2011 at 3:44am

@Mem: I sorry you're having a hard time and I totally agree with you.  This is also my first holiday without Tom and it is been terrible.  Sometimes the overwhelming sadness is more than I can take.  I'm sorry about the business but if you gave the business to your son you have to trust his judgment.  But the memory of all the work you and your husband put into it must be hard on you.  ((Hugs)) Hopefully, we will all get through this together.

Comment by Stumbling (Susan) on December 27, 2011 at 6:56pm

So sorry you are having a tough time.  This was my first also, and I know the ache that is in your heart.  If your husband gave the business to your son, then trust his judgement as if to if he should sell.  If Andre gave him the business, He knew that his son would know what to do.  I send you hugs.  I wish you less heartache.

Comment by freddieb on December 27, 2011 at 5:34pm

Boburly, feeling sad or depressed after a holiday or special occasion is normal.  Just take each day at a time.  This is your journey and we can't compare ourselves to other people, even if we are all experiencing the same thing, our journeys are different, and that's OK.  I haven't dated anyone since Walter died, and I don't have that desire, but I am determined to live a full life even in the midst of my grief.  But, this strength doesn't come from me, it comes from my faith in God.  

Comment by mahagen on December 27, 2011 at 4:23pm

Ah son is getting married in June. So many mine fields to navigate through.  The rehersal dinner, who to invite, the song for the mother son dance..... having to make all the decisions alone..... Wish I had a group of drunken friends to invite!   


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