A community of peers created by the Soaring Spirits Loss Foundation
Groups are a place to help locate folks "like you," and maybe say "hi."
Welcome to this group's coordinator, Wannabmartha!
Latest Activity: 6 hours ago
Juls...so agree with what has been said, but I think there is a difference. Sudden death leaves you completely and totally in shock, one minute they're there and you're talking about what to have for dinner, the next they're gone forever without warning. The results are the same, but there is no preparation. It sounds foolish now, but it never occurred to me in 38 years of marriage that Don could die soon, then one day he did. What you do as her friend is the same as any death. Just be there, don't forget her as time passes, try to remember what helped you. Dianne said it well. I know you understand. Good luck!
Juls, reaching out to this friend could end up being a wonderful gift for you. As Joyce said, just bring her the soup and give her a hug ... and let her know that you will be there for her. Whether we lost our loves quickly or after a long illness, we all share the pain, the loss, the fears, the sleeplessness, the worry, the loneliness. You can provide her with hope that she will survive by seeing that you're still standing.
A co-worker who lost her husband 10 months after I lost mine has become a very close and dear friend, and we were brought together in a similar situation as yours. I hope you and your friend find the same connection.
Lauralee: So happy for you that it's a benign cyst. Whew!!!
Juls, I don't think it really matters the difference in how your spouses died. You understand more than anyone else unless they are a widow or widower. Just bring her the soup and give her a hug that's all you need to do. Hugs to you too
I found out today that a friend of mine (she did some really nice things for us when Frank was so ill) found her husband dead on their treadmill yesterday - massive heart attack. I'm stunned and paralyzed on what to do. We haven't seen each other in months - we aren't close friends and I didn't know her husband extremely well. But they were a loving sweet couple and my heart is breaking for her - I want to help her in some way. I'm planning to take some soup to her house tomorrow after work. She has two kids in their 20s, a close sister and her mom lives nearby. Anyone out there who lost their husband to heart attack who could enlighten me on how her grief may be different? Our situations are so similar - she and I are the same age and both work in schools - and yet so different since my husband died of cancer over time.
Just to say hi I was born 1952 and hubby died 2010. I have to have surgery to straighten a toe 26th March. I will go into hospital as a day patient my sister will take me home after surgery. She will just stay with me for a couple of days. I will be at home on my own after that. With me foot in plaster and hobbeling around the house. I am abit depressed it's not the op I am worried about. It's just being alone in the house after surgery that's getting me down.
Thank God Prayers answered. :)
All is well - benign cyst this time. That is one thing I don't have to deal with now and I am grateful. Thanks again everyone.
Thanks Debbie, Dianne, Drewlady and Cristina for your words of encouragement and caring - I have my appointment scheduled for Friday and hope to find out something then. It is hard to think about anything else but of course life's stresses still occur in the meantime. I hope you and everyone on this site had some peace today.
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