Born in the 70s

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Comment by MrsD 9 hours ago

Why?????? do the schools have to throw these family days?!!!!! Why can't they let family life just be about that - family! Family time is none of the school's business, unless they suspect there's abuse. It serves no purpose and in cases such as ours does more harm than good.

Comment by widow38 on Thursday

Just passed the 6 month mark! My 13yr old son seems to be getting sadder by the day! I wish I could help my kids feel better!

Comment by onmyown on May 14, 2013 at 2:42am

So sorry Brandee.  If she has to, could she make the gift for a grandfather, uncle, etc.? It's so hard. I get that.  I often feel that if it was just me, I  could endure the pain but watching my children grow up without their dad is excruciating.

Jen

Comment by Brandee999 on May 14, 2013 at 12:34am

I have been going through some similar things with my oldest child in school. She is the only child with a father whom has died but there are several others who's fathers are not in the picture. Well, the room mother throwing the end of school year party wants to make Father's Day gifts for the party. I talked to the teacher asking her to call it something different but she not exactly the most cooperative person in the world. I know I can't shelter my babies from Father's Day forever but I was hoping to make this first one just not exists for them this year. I am learning we can nay take each day one step at a time. We are all doing the best we can. There is no manual on the right way to handle the loss of the love of your life. I can say this I am thankful for this site everyday.

Comment by Magee77 on May 5, 2013 at 7:38am

Hi saturnMOON, 

I know it is tough...like you I lost my hubsand when I was 37 and have two kids.  Be proud of yourself.  You are doing a great job as a solo parent.  There are two parent homes that can't even do what we do.  We have been struck hard, yet we get up every day and survive.  We are all doing a great job.  Being a parent is tough, but doing it alone is even harder.  Hang in there. 

 

Comment by MsA on May 5, 2013 at 4:50am

Hi saturnMOON,

I identify with your situation at your kid's school. My daughter is the only kid in her class without a daddy. It really hurts a lot. We can't do half the things her classmates do because it is impossible with just one parent. It's easy to feel like a failure. Hang in there. We are not failures. I pray for gentler times ahead for all of us here. Hello Natalie, Michigan Girl, Life's too short & everyone!

Comment by Natalie on May 4, 2013 at 3:03pm

Hi Michigan Girl,

 

Thank you so much for your kind message. I am so sorry to hear about the loss of your beloved husband. Our husbands are almost the same age. David was 44 when he passed. Just 2 weeks before his 45th birthday.  Thank you for the sage advice about taking baby steps. I am doing my best and am trying to fight through my grief as hard as he fought through the cancer.  Thank you again ((hugs)) Natalie

Comment by saturnMOON on May 4, 2013 at 12:13pm

Hi Everyone,

I'm new to Widville, but was widowed 2 and a half years ago at age 37 when my husband passed away from a heart condition.  I'm raising twin six year-olds solo and my closest family is 100+ miles away.  I really want to define a new roll for myself other than "Widowed Mother of Two," but am stuck, like many of the comments I've read here, with being the only single parent that I know. 

I feel under the microscope when I go to the kids school functions because I'm by myself and all the other mothers seem to be able to volunteer for the lunch hour, library time, etc. while I work full time 20 miles away.  They seem to have all the bases covered including a husband and household income that allows them to be stay-at-home moms while their kids are young.   

Sometimes I just feel like I'm a failure in a neverending test of parenthood where the cards have been stacked against me since before the kids were born.  How can I give them "normal" when we so very clearly are not?  How can I move on when I can't even keep up?

 

 

Comment by Michigan Girl on May 4, 2013 at 1:53am

Hi Natalie. I was 39 when my husband died to of pneumonia he was 43. He passed Feb 16. Sorry for why your here but hope you find some comfort and understanding. I understand the pain. You think you can't possibly hurt so much but yet you do. Take baby steps and be gentle with yourself. I am still taking baby steps myself. (((Hugs)))

Comment by Natalie on May 3, 2013 at 1:05pm

Hello Everyone,

 

I am 39 and lost my beloved husband David on 3/15 of this year. He had myeolodysplasia and passed due to pneumonia.  He left me with his two beautiful teenage daughters who I did not give birth to, but are my daughters with all my heart. I am brand new to Widow Village and hoping to find kindred spirits.  I miss David more than knew I had capacity for. He was a fighter and I know he would expect nothing less of me than to fight through my grief.  Any wisdom or encouragement you can offer is deeply appreciated. I am so sorry to all of you for this terribly way in which we are connected, but very gratefuly to have finally found a support for the widowed.

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