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Born in the  70s

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Comment by SFbay on May 17, 2019 at 12:15pm

Thank you, Clare, ID8 and brokenhearted for your comments...

We've all lost a part of our body, which will never be back and we have no choice but to learn live without it...

But what if we fail to learn, then what will happen?

If there is a share house of widows... I will move in today....

Comment by brokenhearted on May 17, 2019 at 11:16am


It's very understandable and "normal" to feel like this.  You find that one special person you want to spend your life with and then they're taken away much too early.  You can get through this, it will not be easy but you can.  It still hard to believe I've been a widower for 4 years now at 47.  Just take it day by day, or sometime hour by hour.  Seek comfort/guidance in those who care about you, also try to seek comfort in yourself.  We need to try learn about our "new" selves.  Always have hope.

Comment by ID8 (Pete) on May 17, 2019 at 9:12am


I get what you are saying. At 48 years old I can’t believe I am a widower. I always imagined we would grow old together. I am also afraid for what the future holds for me.

Comment by Clare on May 16, 2019 at 9:08pm


I feel this way all the time. I was born in 79 and he was born in 76. He walked out the door and I went looking for him when he didn't come back. I found him gone (heart related) on my front door step. My youngest has the same thing wrong with him but now we know and can monitor it. Still scares me though. That I could lose him too.

Comment by SFbay on May 16, 2019 at 8:55pm

I was born in 1977 and he was in 1976...

I really wish when I wake up tomorrow morning, I am 70 years old/ 80 years old....

I am 41 and what if I live another 40-50 years... I am scared....

Comment by Sad in Milton Keynes on May 15, 2019 at 4:54am

Born in 1972, he was born in '70..

Comment by Sad in Milton Keynes on May 15, 2019 at 3:26am

Hi Manjo, my email address is [email protected] Please contact me. It would be wonderful to connect with you.

Comment by Sad in Milton Keynes on May 15, 2019 at 3:11am

Hi Manjo, please contact me directly if you can. I too am an African, from Kenya, but live in England, we moved here from America 2 years before my husband got leukaemia. He passed away 2 years later, and left me with a now 9 year old. It's tough and lonely, and I have not met many Africans who's husbands have died in their 40s, esp from cancer. So I would love to chat and connect with you:)

Comment by Manjo on May 14, 2019 at 5:24am
  1. Lusaka Zambia, Africa. I lost my husband in December 2012 after losing the battle to prostate cancer that had spread, it was a very difficult time but I give thanks to God who cares for us. The past 6 years have been very lonely because I had to move to my country where I had not lived for many years and everyone has their own thing going on with their families. We never had any children, and sometimes you just need someone to talk to and I doesn't matter what the subject is because it just gets too quiet at times. Its not easy making new friends at a certain age but I still smile every time I think of something good.
Comment by AMA on December 16, 2018 at 8:53pm

NYC Widow 71.....I’m so sorry to hear about what is going on. My husband passed away almost 6 years ago.  I have 3 children who keep me very busy. My youngest (8) is a very athletic little boy. I find myself having to “hang out” with the Dads at football, baseball, soccer etc.  I always felt that they bent over backwards to make me feel comfortable. Lately it’s clear that I am the only woman...and no longer welcome in boy world. In addition my girl friends (all married like yours) simply talk about all the fun vacations they are taking to celebrate anniversaries, how they are remodeling their houses etc. There are at least 3 Holiday parties I was not invited to this season as well. I’m struggling to figure out where I fit in.  Not married but not single (I’m not ready to date). Trying to be a Mom and a Dad but not included in the Dads group. Not able to engage in conversation with my girl friends!  

So I feel your loneliness and understand too well what you are facing. Sadly I am not anywhere near NYC as I live in Southern California but hopefully knowing that you are not alone will help a little. I hope you are able to plug into a good group someday soon. Until then stay strong.  


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