Widowed Village

A community of peers created by the Soaring Spirits Loss Foundation

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Born in the 80s

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Members: 173
Latest Activity: on Monday

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Comment by CaseyLea7 on Monday

Kaitlin,

Make sure to save any voice messages and text messages.  Sometimes I read them or listen to them for comfort.  I know it's hard, no way around it.  Hugs to you.

Comment by kaitlin1983 on August 19, 2014 at 7:02pm

I lost my husband 14 months ago to brain cancer. He was 30 yrs old. So thankful I have our daughter who is 4 yrs old. I miss him so much and have kept his cell phone on this whole time. Just wanting others input on shutting off his phone. It is such a hard decision.

Comment by CrazyWidow on August 19, 2014 at 2:13pm

Local support groups never did me much good.  Same thing as all of you - most of them were my parents or grandparents age and we were in such different stages of life.  I felt jealous that they had all those years together that Kevin and I did not.

Hugs to you Jwdnl on your 8 months.  That's tough.

Comment by CrazyWidow on August 19, 2014 at 1:58pm

Foreverandever I understand where you come from-my husband too had a very rare cancer-Angiosarcoma.  We had no children but watching him pass away slowly, yet quickly, from that cancer was devastating.  It took me a lot of therapy to get those traumatic memories to fade.  Hugs to you as you make this journey without him.

Comment by jwdnl33 on August 10, 2014 at 7:52pm

It will be 8 months this week since I lost my loving wife... I still feel lost at times but have been doing all that I can to continue on, set goals, drive forward putting one foot in front of the other. I moved into a new place last month and this has by far been one of the most challenging tasks since losing Adrienne. All of our life, that I boxed up and put into storage about 10 months ago prior to Adrienne and I moving in with her parents, was all now be opened and pulled from boxes. There are many that I closed back up and just cant deal with yet.... I am grateful for the home, Just trying to make it feel like home without my wife beside me to help every step of the way. Love and prayers to you all throughout all of the different walks, struggles and paths you may be going down. Jesus Calling is an amazing daily devotional that I use now. Have a blessed day.

Comment by CaseyLea7 on August 2, 2014 at 8:57am

Foreverandever,

Yes, sometimes it feels lonely even within the widow community.  I go to a young widow support group where everyone is still 10-20 years older than me.  They don't have toddlers to raise, their children are self-sufficient.  Luckily there are sites like here where you can meet people who really are dealing with similar things as you.  I haven't reach the stage yet, but there will be a time when I have to explain to my daughter what happened and why her life is different, re-live it again.  

There better be some good things in store for us - those that have nursed their dying husbands, struggled with their death, all the while carrying for a young child.  Hugs to you and here if you need a friend.

Comment by Foreverandever on August 2, 2014 at 2:56am
CaseyLea7 it sounds like you and I have a lot in common. Like you, he was also my first love and only love really. I never expected to be a widow at the age of thirty, but then again who does? It seems like nobody really understands what I'm going through. I try to be strong, but lately it's just been hard. Over the last three months my daughter has become very inquisitive and keeps asking why her daddy got sick and why he isn't here when other dads are...it just breaks my heart and stirs up so many emotions.
Comment by CaseyLea7 on August 1, 2014 at 10:25pm

Foreverandever,

I lost my 32 year old husband to a cancer rare for his age, and have an 8 mo old baby girl.  I also lost my best friend, first love, the person I knew I was going to old with, just as it sounds like you have as well.  I am sure you feel like you lost a little of what made you the person you are, I know I do.  It's not fair you are here.  If you need someone to talk to/vent to, etc, let me know.  Prayers to you and your family.

Comment by Foreverandever on August 1, 2014 at 9:07pm
Hello everyone. I'm new to this site and I'm hoping to find people who can relate with my loss without fearing any judgements. I became a widow on September 27, 2013 after my 34 year old beloved husband lost his battle with a very rare type of cancer. He was on a ventilator the last two weeks of his life and to this day I still wish I would have been able to at least hear his voice or at least have him see his little girl one last time before he passed. Our daughter had just turned two and the hospital staff recommended that we not bring her in the room because it might traumatize her. Losing my husband has been the hardest experience in my life so far. We dated since i was fifteen, married nine years later, and became parents two years after that. I spent half of my life with this man. He was my best friend, my better half, and I did everything to keep him here for as long we could. I miss him dearly....everything reminds me of him. At times, I just feel so lost without him.
Comment by CrazyWidow on July 17, 2014 at 4:06pm

Casey - the thing that helped me heal?  Time and this amazing support system here with Widowed Village, at Camp Widow (campwidow.org) and also an amazing family.  My friends kept me busy, my family loved me through it all, and the widows stepped up with empathy and knowledge.

 

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Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

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