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Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

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More Than One Loss (Multiple Losses)

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More Than One Loss (Multiple Losses)

For Villagers who had more than one loss close together, or who lost a child, or were widowed more than once.  You're not alone... please connect here.

Check the 'Help' tab for more guidance or send questions to [email protected]

Members: 202
Latest Activity: on Friday

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Comment by Slick on Friday

thanks Diane for your vote of confidence....it was hard and took a long time......but I got so sick of living death...that I had to come back into the real world .......HUGS and PEACE to all...

Comment by Patience (Diane) on Friday
Hi Steve and Slick..it certainly is hard for all of us.. and Slick, I'm so glad you have "learned how to live life.." ((((hugs))) and cheers to that!
And Steve, I appreciate being able to read your kind words ((((hugs))))
Comment by Slick on Friday

Hi Diane and Steve.....I feel the same as Steve....It is tough...I had multiple losses..starting with my Dad, daughter, sister , 3 of my closest friends for life, in laws, mother Husband...I think I got them all...in a very short period of time...last being my mother in 2014...so I have had time with a one on one counselor to deal with grief...I no longer live death as I did because I had more deceased then alive...it was hard...but I have learned how to live life.....there are so many birthdays and anniversaries....that happen all year long...

I am so sorry you have had so many in a short period of time...it almost makes you used to it until it stops and them you can feel again and it hurts...grief sets in....and heartbreak...thoughts and prayers are with you..

Comment by Steve on Friday

So Sorry, Diane, Its so tough, this part of our life when it seems that everyone is leaving. 

Hugs to you,

Comment by Patience (Diane) on Friday
Hi Steve, going to make it, Hyliek and Slick.. I have been following along here without commenting much. In 2012 I lost my Dear Husband Wayne and 6 weeks later our very very best friend, Ray who was as my husband was....a "friend to all!" .
..Now 2017 has been really difficult - my Father in Law died in February suddenly of a heart attack. Then my own Father died April 7th after a long battle with Alzheimer's...this Father's Day will be hard for my girls and I - we've officially lost all of our fathers..
My daughter's grand father in law is 86 and doing very well, so that is a blessing and I'm hoping we will see him on Father's Day...
Comment by Steve on May 16, 2017 at 5:29pm
Hi GTMI, sorry, i forgot your first name. So sorry to hear of the 3 recent losses. They are tough one at a time, nevermind 3 in 1 month! Last year was like that for me, Dad passed Feb 16, dear friend April 19th, (my bday is April 21) then my partners mother in May 2 days b4 mothers day. I was very close to Mikes mom, closer than my own mother.
This year 2 friends in early 50s, and a very sweet aunt is days away from passing, w stage 4 cancer at 63. Ugh. I know everyone shares similar journies. Its just so difficult to heal, when they keep happening over and over. I dont go to funerals anymore, because i dont want to remember them that way. I would not go, then continue to support families after. Thats how i am. I know most feel differently, but, i dont visit Mikes grave either, or anyone elses. I dont believe our loved ones are there, i visit them in my mind every day. If i go to grave, im in bed for a week after. (((((Hugs))))
Comment by going to make it on May 16, 2017 at 4:24pm
Steve, I feel exactly the same! 3 deaths in the past month!! Thought it was just me. I still attend some funerals out of respect, but not all of them. It's just too much.
Comment by Steve on May 16, 2017 at 8:15am
Hi Hyliek, sorry to hear you had some bad weather, hope all is well now. Its strange how i have found life works. At least for me and maybe you, and others. Once 45 hit, in my age, all hell broke loose with people passing. Friends, relatives, spouse, parents, so on. No kidding, i cant count them all, at least 20 or more, in past 10 yrs. significant people in my daily life. Its been really tough. Its kind of weird now, its almost like it doesnt surprise me anymore. Im sad at another loss in my life, but, its not a shock, like it used to be. I dont go to funerals anymore, ive been to too many. So many passing in mid 40s, thru early 60s. I always thought most people made it to mid 70s anyway. Not in my life. Maybe its because we were all a child of the 60s and 70s? Lol. I know i was crazy in my teens and early 20s! So were most of my friends that are mostly gone now.
Comment by hyliek on May 16, 2017 at 2:43am

Sorry our weather affected our internet a bit.  How you all keeping.  Thanks for the positive feedback, at least I am not crazy yet.  The deaths were close together so I think it is all hitting me at once, but I will be fine. (((((hugs)))))

Comment by Slick on May 13, 2017 at 3:15am

Hi Steve..................  hyliek.......I also went through a time when I was very snappy with others...it also isn't me ...it has since passed Thank God....Maybe after 4-5 years.....it's very hard to be a full time caregiver and get up the morning after our love passes..........alone , no purpose in getting up, fear of what the future holds...and feeling so alone and missing them so much.......I hope this passes quickly for you...it does rear it's ugly head at times for years...but it's shorter lived and not as severe......PEACE

 

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