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Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

More Than One Loss (Multiple Losses)


More Than One Loss (Multiple Losses)

For Villagers who had more than one loss close together, or who lost a child, or were widowed more than once.  You're not alone... please connect here.

Check the 'Help' tab for more guidance or send questions to [email protected]

Members: 226
Latest Activity: Feb 22

Comment Wall


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Comment by Steve on May 19, 2017 at 1:20pm

So Sorry, Diane, Its so tough, this part of our life when it seems that everyone is leaving. 

Hugs to you,

Comment by Patience on May 19, 2017 at 1:17pm
Hi Steve, going to make it, Hyliek and Slick.. I have been following along here without commenting much. In 2012 I lost my Dear Husband Wayne and 6 weeks later our very very best friend, Ray who was as my husband was....a "friend to all!" .
..Now 2017 has been really difficult - my Father in Law died in February suddenly of a heart attack. Then my own Father died April 7th after a long battle with Alzheimer's...this Father's Day will be hard for my girls and I - we've officially lost all of our fathers..
My daughter's grand father in law is 86 and doing very well, so that is a blessing and I'm hoping we will see him on Father's Day...
Comment by Steve on May 16, 2017 at 5:29pm
Hi GTMI, sorry, i forgot your first name. So sorry to hear of the 3 recent losses. They are tough one at a time, nevermind 3 in 1 month! Last year was like that for me, Dad passed Feb 16, dear friend April 19th, (my bday is April 21) then my partners mother in May 2 days b4 mothers day. I was very close to Mikes mom, closer than my own mother.
This year 2 friends in early 50s, and a very sweet aunt is days away from passing, w stage 4 cancer at 63. Ugh. I know everyone shares similar journies. Its just so difficult to heal, when they keep happening over and over. I dont go to funerals anymore, because i dont want to remember them that way. I would not go, then continue to support families after. Thats how i am. I know most feel differently, but, i dont visit Mikes grave either, or anyone elses. I dont believe our loved ones are there, i visit them in my mind every day. If i go to grave, im in bed for a week after. (((((Hugs))))
Comment by going to make it on May 16, 2017 at 4:24pm
Steve, I feel exactly the same! 3 deaths in the past month!! Thought it was just me. I still attend some funerals out of respect, but not all of them. It's just too much.
Comment by Steve on May 16, 2017 at 8:15am
Hi Hyliek, sorry to hear you had some bad weather, hope all is well now. Its strange how i have found life works. At least for me and maybe you, and others. Once 45 hit, in my age, all hell broke loose with people passing. Friends, relatives, spouse, parents, so on. No kidding, i cant count them all, at least 20 or more, in past 10 yrs. significant people in my daily life. Its been really tough. Its kind of weird now, its almost like it doesnt surprise me anymore. Im sad at another loss in my life, but, its not a shock, like it used to be. I dont go to funerals anymore, ive been to too many. So many passing in mid 40s, thru early 60s. I always thought most people made it to mid 70s anyway. Not in my life. Maybe its because we were all a child of the 60s and 70s? Lol. I know i was crazy in my teens and early 20s! So were most of my friends that are mostly gone now.
Comment by hyliek on May 16, 2017 at 2:43am

Sorry our weather affected our internet a bit.  How you all keeping.  Thanks for the positive feedback, at least I am not crazy yet.  The deaths were close together so I think it is all hitting me at once, but I will be fine. (((((hugs)))))

Comment by Steve on May 12, 2017 at 10:51pm
Oh yes, i remember after my partner passed, I of course was lost without him, however, i was just so lost not having 1000 things to do everyday, to care for him and keep things going at home. I went from going 100mph from 6am till midnight, 7 days per week, to nothing! It was so hard to get used to "relaxing" and just concentrating on me for the first time in years. It took quite awhile to get used to that new norm. Also, personality quirks, like shorter temper, being sleepy, or not being able to sleep, now liking reading, or now hating reading, its all completely normal with what we have been thru. Its crazy-making.
Comment by hyliek on May 12, 2017 at 9:28pm

Hi Steve, yip sometimes it is harder than others.  I find myself becoming irritated more easily with people, as I work with people all day.  It is not in my nature, but I think it will pass as I learn to settle down to a single life again.  Find my feet etc.  Always had to take care of someone now I feel at a lose end sometimes. 

Comment by Steve on May 12, 2017 at 8:26am
Hi Hyliek, oh my goodness, (((hugs))) to you with regard to your husbands and daughters. I have family in Joberg, have never been to Africa, but hope to go someday.
I have also been thru a period of great loss over the past 10 years, and its tough to learn to live without these people and animals in our daily lives. Im so grateful to this site, and all the wonderful people i have shared with here. Its truly saved me countless times in those darkest of times. My heart and thoughts are with you. Take care
Comment by hyliek on May 12, 2017 at 3:44am

Hi Slick, I am forever grateful that I have a super Church who is so supportive.  Even helped to break down my bathroom door to get my husband out when he collapsed from a stroke, unfortunately he passed away within 12 hours.  What you do you do for a living and where do you live.


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