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This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

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Pregnant Widows

If you are pregnant now, or were pregnant when your partner passed, you'll find others here who share your story.

Check the 'Help' tab for more guidance or send questions to [email protected]

Members: 69
Latest Activity: Feb 1, 2017

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Comment by Caledonia on April 1, 2016 at 6:51pm
I lost my husband Sept 30 2015, I was 35 weeks pregnant at the time with our first child. I gave birth to our little boy Nov 18th and it's so hard, knowing he will never met his Dad. I talk about him all the time to my son, who I named after his Dad, but it's so overwhelming to imagine life as a single parent. I know I have help and support from our families, but I never in a million years thought I would have to make the parenting decisions on my own. We hadn't even picked out a name yet, it breaks my already shattered heart to know his Dad died not knowing what his son would be named. It's been 6 months and I feel liked the grief gets worse with every baby milestone because he's not here to share it with us.
Comment by Coral on April 1, 2016 at 4:55pm
I find weekends so hard to get through...granted every single day is hard...weekends were our time...it was always just the two of us, and though there is much support from family and friends, I keep finding I want to be alone...as if somehow I'll be with him. Constantly the sadness of him not being there through the delivery on our baby overwhelms me.
Comment by AchiPong on March 21, 2016 at 5:09am
Coral, I used to speak with him in my mind, imagining what would he say or what will be his response and it really drives me insane. This is the kind of pain I think that won't heal by time itself. I think It would be here forever and will just get used to it.
Comment by Coral on March 20, 2016 at 12:21pm
Pessie2015&Achipong,
I wake up every morning wondering when the pain will go away... As if one day he'll be back and things will be back to normal. For some reason, thats the only thing that brings me comfort, is the hope I'll see him again, or somehow communicate. We lived with his parents when he passed, and it helps in a sense of feeling he's still here... It just pains me so much to imagine raising the baby without him, giving birth without him, as he would excitingly tell me he couldn't wait for it all.... It does strangely help to know I'm not the only one going thru this, as it's hard to explain or for others with a different relationship with him to relate.
Comment by AchiPong on March 17, 2016 at 8:09am
Coral, We're about to know the gender of the baby before he died because of the accident. My husband never get to see our baby's kick and gender. I am too expecting in June.

Pessie, It is really hard to believe what happened. I am still wishing that one day I will wake up with him by myside. The denial stage we'd been going through.
Comment by Pessie2015 on March 17, 2016 at 6:02am
I've been on here for awhile but couldn't bring myself to post. I lost my husband suddenly to a fall on October 16, 2015. We were going to announce our pregnancy with our second child the weekend he passed at my birthday party. I can't believe 5 months has passed. I still have a difficult time believing it happened and that we're in this position. I have an almost 2 year old son and I am due May 1 with another little boy and it's just heartbreaking to know they will never know their father. We are fortunate enough to have moved in with my parents so they can help because most days I feel like I'm not emotionally or even physically there for my son the way he needs. I have found comfort in yoga, reiki, and, meditation, but nothing takes away the pain of the loss. I know just find myself missing him so much and he's still on my mind every moment. I feel for all of you that are going through this, I have found it helps to talk with other strong, beautiful women in similar situations. I know we will be ok, it just is not the life we ever planned or would have imagined for our children.
Comment by Coral on March 16, 2016 at 6:57pm
Achipong,
I understand how you feel... I lost my boyfriend Feb 10th by a motorcycle accident... I feel its hard to explain the pain to those around me considering he was my everything, and knee each other in ways no one else did...I miss him everyday... And cry when I feel the baby kick, because it reminds me of the first time he felt our baby kick and how excited he was.... it's hard to imagine this without him... And I too feel alone. I'm 6 months pregnant and expecting in June...
Comment by AchiPong on March 11, 2016 at 6:32pm
Thank you Halfking, every memories he left me were surely like bittersweet now and I will definitely share it with the baby when he comes out, as he grows.
Comment by Halfking on March 11, 2016 at 7:43am

And I will add that even though I am nearly eight years out, and my daughter just turned 7 (I was two months pregnant when I lost my husband)not a day goes by that I don't think about nor celebrate my husband.  Just today on the subway platform, taking my daughter to school, we heard a song he played for me at our wedding and I held my girl and we danced right there.  Was a bittersweet way to begin the day.  But I share with her freely (as appropriate) and I constantly share with her things about her dad.  So they remain with us, always.

Comment by Halfking on March 11, 2016 at 7:40am

Hi AchiPong and all - I check in now and then and and am again so saddened to see more in similar situations.  For those of you "hanging on" and wanting to die, I get it, it is a dark place to be.  But I will suggest that you focus on your pregnancies and let that be a beautiful excuse for moving forward through your days.  Take small, very small steps - just get yourselves through each day.  Therapy is extremely helpful and you should lean on those on this site who are living proof that your days will be brighter and your children will be wonderful joys when they arrive.  They are well worth living for.  Please feel free to reach out to me directly as I am not on this site often...  Just keep going!!!

Susan ([email protected])

http://thesusie.blogspot.com/

 

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