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Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.
Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.
We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."
For those widowed suddenly or unexpectedly by any cause.
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Latest Activity: yesterday
Does anyone live in st. Louis missouri? I am hoping to connect with other widows and widowers. I live in illinois near downtown missouri. Message me if your interested
Mrs. Hehar, Hospice of the Valley has grief support groups and counselors. Might be a good place to start. I know what you mean about the anxiety. My heart rate & blood pressure went through the roof after my husband died. Laurajay gives good advice- I keep forgetting that the 'okay' days don 't last. I get sucked under by waves of hopelessness. I have to learn to be more conscious of and more prepared for what my life is like now.
Mrs. Hehar. This place we are asked to remember is not for us to give legal or medical advice but to share our stories. We are not professionals nor licensed to tell anyone what to do- only to suggest our opinions. Please, like administration says, do not choose an action to take based only on what you read here. My suggestion is to not do anything for now that will add to your anxiety. Not Landmark or anything that requires lots of money or in any way uses mind control without being licensed/ or without credentials to do so.
Can you begin with a religious person who can remind you of your gift of life and purpose? Help you to realize death is every person's experience sooner or later. Assure you that every crazy, strange, surreal feeling you are having is 100% normal when grief is raw/fresh as yours is~ if not a religious counselor what about social services or mental health or hospice services? Can your medical doctor give you suggestions or refer you to someone? Don't put it off--pick someone and go. If they don't seem right when you meet them. Leave and try someone else. It's your life your choices. You need to feel comfortable when choosing help.
For now, while you are anxious and crying a lot and out of sorts in pain- be your own best friend to help you in healing. Don't expect instant answers or solutions. Eat well no junk- you want to get strong to meet life's new challenges. Sleep when you can. You are not Wonder Woman. Don't expect to snap back and have things back to normal because normal has had real changes and will never be the same. Trust that there is an understanding within you that will in time come to the surface and help you move forward. You just don't care and don't see it -yet. It will come. Slowly. Best of luck. Be gentle and patient with yourself for a little longer- time required for healing...lots of time.
Hi, I sent you a friend request. I've been reading a lot about it and the more I think about it, the more it scares me. I am having really bad anxiety today. I need to pick a therapist and just thinking about making that choice is freaking me out. The heat doesn't help. Please send me some of those suggestions.
Mrs. Hehar, my sister specifically was involved in it for at least a year or two. Even volunteering so it was less expensive for her. There was some positive to it, in terms of the life coaching/improve yourself sort of advice. But I would say that cult is not too strong of a term. There was a lot of manipulation and control going on, especially the idea that if you seek these things in any other manner from any other place you are doing things wrong, judgement if you don't come as often as they ask, judgement as you leave/try to leave, and the monetary cost that increases. My sister also had a romantic relationship through someone there that became more and more abusive as well, which of course the Landmark people, being the sort of place they were, however much they were aware of did not intervene in, and maybe it was because of her boyfriend's shaping by the place that he thought he could control and manipulate my sister in the same way Landmark was. I would avoid the place. I could point you to other places I would trust for that sort of help, both nationally and if you want to PM me with the area you are in.
I'm not sure really, some reviews call it a cult, but some people say it really helps you think clearer and people come out feeling happier? I feel like it might be a self help kind of group/forum. I heard its like 3 days long from morning til evening and there are group discussions and lectures. Honestly the information on the net seems biased, I tried to search if any widows attend, but I found nothing in my searches. That is why I thought to ask here, maybe someone here has gone? I know someone who had a divorce and attended it, but my situation feels so much different than a divorce. Hell I wish it was a divorce and not a forever never going to see him again in my life situation. Omg I am not having a good day. Just saying that made me cry hysterically. I wish there was someway to fix this.
What is it?
Hi, I was wondering if anyone here has taken this course called Landmark? Someone in my family suggested it to me, saying she wanted to take it. But I have no idea that if what I am going thru it would be a good idea. Has anyone tried it? or any thoughts on it?
I got the OSHA investigation report for Marcus's accident in the mail on Saturday. It has given me a little bit of peace because now I know exactly what happened, but SO much anger because this could have and should have been prevented. I can feel myself putting up barriers and isolating myself so this anger doesn't lash out at those innocent bystanders in my life. Every.single.thing has pissed me off since I opened the envelope. I want to turn this anger around and be proactive with it... but find myself more interested in brewing and stewing.
My life: Wake up, shake off the dreams, do whatever it takes to get through the day. 9:00pm, begin wine and drugs to help me fall asleep. Dream about searching for my husband, often finding him dead. Wake up, shake off the dreams.... Repeat. Day after day. Night after night. My life.
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