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This site is run by widowed people, for widowed people

Widowed Village connects peers with each other for friendship and sharing. The moderators, administrators, and others involved in running this site are not professionals.

Please don't interpret anything you read here as medical, legal, or otherwise expert advice. Don't disregard any expert's advice or take any action as a result of what you read here.

We're friends, not doctors, financial or legal professionals, and we're not "grief experts." But we are here, and we've been "there."

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Suddenly Widowed

For those widowed suddenly or unexpectedly by any cause. 

Check the 'Help' tab for more guidance or send questions to [email protected]

Members: 1623
Latest Activity: 16 hours ago

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Comment by wannabmartha on March 3, 2011 at 11:41am
My husband and oldest son died together in a plane crash January 2009. "Suddenly" my life changed completely. It's been a slow and painful adjustment that I'm constantly struggling through. I notice now that the lows aren't quite as low. The awful feeling in my stomach is not quite as intense as it was.
Comment by kismet on March 3, 2011 at 9:14am

Hi, I'm new. My husband died a long time ago. We married just prior to his death. I'm so glad I had the chance to marry him before he died. 

 

I'm just saying "hi."

Comment by bmcmillen on March 3, 2011 at 8:15am

Hi I am new here. I became widowed suddenly in August 2008. My husband committed suicide that day.He was 42. We had been together for 25 years.  Tuesday was our wedding anniversary and I feel like all the depression and anxiety are hitting me full force. 

Comment by EatPrayLove on March 3, 2011 at 6:01am

Hi Carol,

I knew as soon as I got the call that it was very bad because if he had been at all able, he would have called me himself. He was 46. He'd had a normal EKG, good cholesterol levels, fit, active. He had only been sick twice in the 22 years I knew him, and both times were mild colds. There just are no guarantees.

 

Lorie

Comment by Carol Scibelli on March 3, 2011 at 5:13am

Oh...so horrible EatPrayLove, 

   What a phone call or knock at the door.  My husband, Jimmy, died almost five years ago and 'suddenly' was really a month of suffering from Lymphoma...he had just turned 56.  How old was your husband? 

Comment by EatPrayLove on March 2, 2011 at 5:03pm

Hi All,

My husband died very suddenly almost three years ago. He was at work at the time. They said he said "oh" and fell to the floor. He had no symptoms or warning signs.

Comment by CIN_C2006 on March 2, 2011 at 11:22am

the word, "suddenly"...WOW! Ronnie was preparing to participate in a fishing tournament for the weekend. He told his fishing partner (which was also his best friend) that he needed "relieve himself" one more time B4 going out in the boat for the day. The friend went to see why such a long delay...found Ronnie unresponsive on couch. I did not find out of what Ronnie actually died from until the Donor ppl said that he had Bleed Out eternally....was from a ruptured aorta abdominal aneurysm (AAA). Ronnie would had been age 57 in 6 more days.

Comment by Susieg on March 2, 2011 at 10:08am
Well Kane,  I think you are very brave.  22 months for me, I still have not done it. And I don't know when I will.....I still wear my rings.  And his.  I still feel married, and I don't see how getting rid of any of these things, or changing my ring to my right hand, is going to make me feel better.
Comment by Kane on March 2, 2011 at 8:11am

Well I just finished cleaning out the last of my husbands clothes - 17 months later.  I have saved lots for the kids (and me) to go through whenever they want!  What a hard thing to do, but I knew I was ready.  I cried the entire time and my kids just played around me and did not ask anything, I think they just knew it was Daddy's stuff! 

 

Tomorrow is his birthday....we are celebrating with cake and sushi!

 

I am going to have a cup of tea now, and maybe a big bag of chips (never at 10am!).  How to be kind to yourself on days like today?!


VOLUNTEER
Comment by Soaring Spirits on February 18, 2011 at 6:13pm

About "who can join" -- I don't think it's important to be "accurate" about it... I think it's what you feel, where you feel you belong. There are some who will want to join both (like.... had cancer, but died from it very quickly). But because all the conversation here (and in Long Term illness) is open, people don't have to JOIN just to learn about your experience, only to "mark themselves." So we don't want all the moderators joining both groups just to feel a part of it. If it sounds true to you.... join it (you can friend people regardless of whether you join). Mainly groups are to identify each other, so we see the same faces from page to page, and so that the OTHER discussions are as inclusive as possible. In my experience, OPEN discussions rule -- the differences start to pale the more we learn from each other.

Hugs to you all for sharing... let me know how this is working for you, are you finding things of interest, would you like to do more, etc etc. We're delighted to create a new place that supports YOUR needs!

 

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