Widowed in 2012

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Comment by Lynne on June 7, 2012 at 10:21pm

Hi Bonnie and Deb.  Haven't checked in on this group in a bit but saw your names pop up today and wanted to say how very, very sorry I am for your losses.  I think that you can find a lot of care and support on here and, certainly, people to chat with and share your thoughts and feelings with.  We are all going through much the same thing so the understanding part comes all too easy.  I lost my husband of almost 41 years on March 27th - a sudden and unexpected heart attack (no prior diagnosis or treatment) and I'm still struggling with all the feelings that come along with such a thing.  We're always sorry for the reason that someone else has to join our group but please know that we're all here for each other.  Wishing you all the best.  Lynne

Comment by Bonnie on June 7, 2012 at 10:03pm

I can't believe I need a group like this.Thank you for all the kind welcomes. I am still in denial I think.My kids have returned to their lives.I feel so alone.I'm sorry that anyone would need a group like this.I just hope I can make it through this part of my life journey on my own. 

Comment by Deb__ on June 7, 2012 at 9:52pm

Thank you for the warm welcome Ccdague. I am so sorry for your loss. I hate cancer so much. 

Hi Bonnie. Looks like we joined this group at the same time. Your grief is so fresh right now. Those early weeks are a blur to me now. I'm very sorry for your loss Bonnie. xxx

Comment by Ccdague on June 7, 2012 at 9:29pm

Bonnie and deb...I am so sorry that you both have joined our group....I lost my husband Denny on march 22 to melanoma. Bonnie...you are new to this as I was when I joined. Stay with us these next few months especially....we will help you walk through this bumpy path. Stop in to chat....there are many there who can hold you up when your own legs refuse to do so.

Comment by Bonnie on June 7, 2012 at 7:58pm

Hi,I"m new to the group.My name is Bonnie and I lost my husband May 27 2012.My pain is raw right now and I hate the idea of having to belong to a widows group.I was married to my soul mate 38 years and raised 5 great kids.He was ready to retire and we were going to do things for just us now.He died from a sepsis infection.I'm glad I found this group.

Comment by Deb__ on June 7, 2012 at 7:41pm

Hi everyone,
My name is Deb. I lost my wonderful husband (my best friend) and our children lost their lovely Dad on 17th January 2012. He died of bile duct cancer just one month after diagnosis. The world is a very lonely place without him. He was 47.
xxxxxx

Comment by Suz on May 29, 2012 at 6:50pm

Laura,

I am so sorry you lost your soulmate. I lost mine, too. Hopefully we can all help each other.

Fondly,

Suz

Comment by AlanRRT on May 29, 2012 at 3:09pm

Hi Laura (MissMyBuh-buh),

So nice meeting you in chat today.  So sorry that you have a need to be here, but there are many that can understand what you're going through, because we're all on this miserable journey together.  I pray you will find some peace and comfort in your life.  WV is one of the great tools that we have to rebuild our lives.

Alan

Comment by moosemama3(Renee) on May 25, 2012 at 9:15am

I hate seeing new names pop up :( but glad you find your way here.  I have ups and downs, some days feel I am doing better than I should right now for a love that was so deep and strong.  Where it has only been 2 months since physically he has been gone I think I may very well have started grieving back in January.  After all the research and knowing his chances were slim for survival.  I hold onto our spiritual beliefs and I KNOW he is with me in all that is done daily.  We talk and have coffee.  Fridays are still very difficult for me, I find fear of being alone setting in and trying to fight those feelings as that is not the type of person I want to attract into my life.  I find I count weeks and w/o realizing it... subconsciencely I count the actual months.  The waterworks were flowing the other day and I couldn't for the life of me figure out when until I started blogging and it was at the exact moment 2 months prior he took his final breaths.  I get up, get dressed, put my makeup on and a happy face for my customers, for my children even when inside I want to cry and hide.  Even though I deal with hormonal moms in my job...the gift of seeing new life always is amazing helps.  I never thought I would be able to appreciate working in the hospital again but once I pushed past the anxiety those first days/weeks it has gotten better.  I still feel like working again after only a week was too soon, but now feeling okay.  Maybe it is getting back to swing of life, keeping his spirit alive, our belief etc it is all helpful, I still miss him dearly and cry if I stop or sometimes even if I hear the windchimes that were sent in his membranous will make me tear up.  I still find I talk to my customers as if he is here and have to stop and change subject before I cry.  Bereavement rollercoaster sucks for sure.  Counselor said I looked good the other day so that felt good to hear.  Does anyone else blog?? 

Comment by Danabear on May 25, 2012 at 8:37am

Hi Everyone. I'm sorry to see all of us here. My husband, Dana, died suddenly on March 19, 2012 of cardiac myopathy. He had successfully fought a severe form of non-hodgkin's lymphoma 3 years ago and was cancer free. What we didn't realize, until the autopsy, was that the chemo had badly damaged his heart. I have two boys - ages 6 and 7 - that I'm trying very hard to be 'present' for right now, but it's a daily challenge. I'm so glad there are others here willing to listen. Thanks.

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